Let's put aside the fact that it doesn't follow the original message of the story or, you know, the story itself. It can be forgiven for that, as well as asinine elements like Milady surviving and the Musketeers deciding that the best way to forestall a war between France and England was to blow up the Duke of Buckingham's house. The high production value adds it's part to make it at least visually interesting. The continued appearance of familiar faces will make you say "oh, it's so-and-so", which is just about the most fun you'll have all movie. The fatal flaw of this film is, without a doubt, the script. It is so cliché and modernized that I amused myself by guessing what line would come next and was right an unnerving amount of the time. The jokes all fell flat, the Mission Impossible style of action made me want to cry, and it was clear that the actors were rushing their way through the lines as quickly as possible to collect their money. It made me smile that someone actually got paid to write this script, and then whoever played Constance got paid to look like she was reading off of cue cards every time she was on screen. Let's talk about the actors, none of whom are French or bothered to try for a French accent. Watching the good guys was like watching paint dry. The Musketeers, who are all good actors, looked bored to tears, and while that might have worked for a time due to the rut their characters are in, it soon became clear that Matthew MacFayden's brain was taking a nap while he let his deep vocal chords say the lines, hoping the baritone would cover the necessary bases. Luke Evans did his hair in a mirror and knew that that would be enough to keep girls watching, so he didn't even bother. Ray Stevenson had the most charisma, and so predictably got the least screen time. Logan Lerman tried, but seemed more like he needed to go back to high school than one of the greatest swordsmen in France. I already discussed whatever Constance was supposed to me. A mannequin, perhaps. It seemed that the King and Queen had the only real character and heart in the entire film, which is unfortunate because she is barely in it and he is a dunce.Oh also there is a character who is supposed to be comic relief played by James Corden. Casting Oscar winners and fan favorite as villains almost guaranteed a complete overshadowing of the heroes, though this didn't make them exponentially more interesting. Christoph Waltz is good enough that he would have to try to fail, but he clearly regretted buying whatever it was that necessitated the salary of this movie. Milla Jovovich pretty much just did what she does every movie, which is not always a plus. Mads Mikkelsen gets a shout out for at least trying to do a good job despite awful lines and zero character development, and per the usual Mads, succeeding very well. At least he looked cool and managed to deliver his lines with a straight face and a certain amount of menace. I do feel that he broke character at the time of his ridiculous death, where I could have sworn that he was visibly relieved at finally being able to leave this travesty of a film. Orlando Bloom alone gets full stars as being the only person, including the audience, having any fun, and having a lot of it. Bottom line is, unless you need a really good laugh, this is all Redbox has to offer or you're a big enough Bloom or Mikkelsen fan that you want to see them as another cool minor character, skip this one.

In some ways this film can be seen as being enjoyable in a tongue-in-cheek, goofy, 'not to be taken seriously' type way, but it's the wait that's involved in getting there that is likely to be a make or break aspect for the audience....I must admit that I'm not overly-familiar with the source material here so wasn't really sure what to expect; however I was slightly disappointed with the actual structure of this film. Here, we have a first half which seemed to have very little going on and seemed to exist only as a long-winded way of introducing D'Artagnan. There are some amusing moments to be found in this set-up, but for me it felt that there was far too much unnecessary padding to what is essentially a fairly simple story.Given that it was slow in building itself up I hoped that my patience would be rewarded by some fantastic swashbuckling action and impressive fight sequences and once again I left feeling slightly disappointed. True, there are some fight sequences and some swashbuckling, but not enough - maybe my expectations were too high, but I just found that the film was rather weak as both an action film and as a story. I also thought that the ending was rather poor as well.Thankfully the film does benefit from strong camaraderie between the principal cast and this does help to carry the film through some of the duller moments and makes it feel slightly better than it should be - as D'Artagnan Lerman brings a sort of cheeky charm to the film and also brings some much needed fun. The likes of MacFadyen, Stevenson and Evans also work their roles well too and all 4 of these players are what really hold this film together.My thoughts on this version of The Three Musketeers is that it was entertaining in spots with the principal cast making it quite fun to watch at times. However, I thought it was a little on the slow side and also thought it would be more action-packed. For those reasons I found it a little disappointing overall.

Silly movie this one but not boring. It cost $75M and it shows. There are huge problems though.First of all we deal with a classic here, so it has a legacy that must be respected. In this version, every character is presented as a buffoon. The acting, the deliverance...Leonardo da Vinci, we learn, has drawn up plans for a flying "war machine," a combination of dirigible and seafaring galleon. The plot and the dialogs are full of hot air like the war machine. The director is obviously thought that these were minor issues!The action is dominated by green-screen and Matrix-like effects.Overall: Not boring if you are 9 y.o. but a disgrace nevertheless...

The Three Musketeers (2011): Dir: Paul W.S. Anderson / Cast: Logan Lerman, Milla Jovovich, Orlando Bloom, Christoph Waltz, Gabriella Wilde: A surprisingly entertaining version of a story that has been exhausted through many terrible releases. Director Paul W.S. Anderson has made many stupid films such as Soldier and Event Horizon but here he presents the famed characters as a token of grand entertainment. Problem is that the title fails since there seems to be four or five Musketeers here as oppose to the usual. Lerman Logan is the young new edition whose father was a Musketeer and he seeks the same reputation. He gets his wish when several misunderstandings lead to a planned confrontation, which fuses into beating up several armed guards. They are arrested and end up on a quest involving airship blueprints and a stolen necklace. Logan fares well as the young Musketeer out to prove himself as well as place himself within the midst of danger and exhilarating sword action. Milla Jovovich steals scenes as a female who betrays the Musketeers after a theft. She is faced with an effective situation aboard an airship that seems too fatal until the closing scene. Orlando Bloom is good as villain Buckingham who outsmarts the Musketeers with Jovovich's betrayal but his defeat bears some humour. Gabriella Wilde plays Logan's romantic other who attempts to warn him of the odds against him. The screenplay is entertaining without being too action oriented, yet celebrating the special effects. Do not expect a provocative writing but do expect fun filled pointless entertainment. Score: 8 / 10