This movie is unacceptable. If you were in it. You owe everyone who ever saw it a heartfelt apology. Jesus god this flick sucks

After a voodoo-inspired disaster at sea three survivors wash up on a deserted island. The three survivors are unfortunately played by Kelly Brook, Billy Zane and Juan Pablo Di Pace. Unfortunate because none of the three can act. Of course Brook wasn't hired because someone was under the impression she was her generation's Katharine Hepburn. She's just here to fill out a bikini which she does admirably. Sadly the script does in fact call for her to speak and every time she does the movie suffers terribly. Remarkably though, hers is not the worst acting performance in this hideous movie. That dubious distinction goes to Zane who is laughably atrocious. For a guy who once had some semblance of a legitimate acting career this is quite a nadir. The third wheel, Di Pace, is for good reason an anonymous nobody. He has no talent whatsoever, his horrible delivery of dialogue at least provides some chuckles. Our trio of terrible performers play a trio of terrible characters. Brook and Zane play a spoiled rich couple. She's an airhead bimbo, he's an insufferable jerk. Di Pace plays a guy who works on a boat bringing insufferable rich jerks beer. He is rather insufferable himself and, sadly for him, never learned that you don't hit women who know voodoo. You don't sympathize with any of the three characters, you certainly don't root for any of them. Forget hoping they get off the island, you just wish they'd die so the movie could be over. It's only 90 minutes long but it seems absolutely interminable. There are only two things even remotely worthwhile about the movie, both of which are located directly beneath Brook's neck. Lousy story, lousy acting, some of the worst dialogue ever written. No intrigue whatsoever. Which of the two jerks on the island will the bimbo end up with? Who cares? All attempts to build drama and tension fail miserably. This is a clear candidate for any list of the worst movies ever made.

Every now and then a small group of actors get together and make an inoffensive, sex filled location film which is really just an excuse for them to have a bit of a holiday and run around in swimsuits. And so in tradition of the Big Bounce, After the Sunset and Into the Blue, comes Three, a paper thin thriller with some completely gratuitous sex scenes and a nonsensical plot.On the plus side, we get 90 minutes making a very compelling case for Kelly Brook winning a high profile poll recently regarding the greatest bikini bodies of all time, and she is truly a sight to behold. The location certainly looks nice, though it is rather hard to believe we are on a deserted remote island.The performances are all what you'd expect, with Zane easily stealing the film from his rather wooden co stars. Brook is no worse than a thousand other actresses you've seen on screen, and while most of the thriller scenes are rather silly, Manuel's fate does pack a punch.The weakness of the story is that we are never really given much of a reason to side with Jennifer. We see her having wild sex with Jack while tied up in the opening 15 minutes, even sounding open to the idea of a threesome and as the movie develops we can't help but think that Jennifer is the exact type of woman who'd go rolling around in the sand on a deserted island with a hot Spaniard, making her husband's paranoia perfectly understandable.But in the end Three does exactly what it says on the label, and will probably help Kelly Brook top best bikini body polls for years to come.

Survival Island is a film that I happened to come upon on one of the cable movie channels a few months ago. After seeing only the second half the first time I caught it, it left me inquiring when it would be on again so that I could see it in it's entirety. It's a bit of a slow-going film with no real suspense until the middle and end of the movie. The characters in the film are very "life like" and have real talent compared to many of the films that I've seen under the same "ship wrecked on a deserted island" theme. The only character/actor that you will most notably recognize is Billy Zane(Titanic) whom I'm not a big fan of. The other actors are not to bad to look at at all. I'll admit to the fact that the "skin" scenes in the film kept me coming back. There are no gratuidous nude scenes. You'll see her nude from the waist up on more than two occasions and you will see his nude backside on two different occasions. Although they were few and far between, those scenes along with the beautiful beach and ocean scenery will satisfy those with a free night and nothing else to watch and/or do.