Did you ever wonder if the LDS church is deeply sexist? Good news, the answer is in short film format! Is selling people okay? Sure! Are women property? You bet! Is this a film and story that is so ingrained into this sexist religion that you will hear someone mention the 8 cow woman regularly if you live in Utah? Disturbingly, yes!But wait, there is more! Bizarre accent work? Yes! Impossible plot points? Yes! Insulting premise? Yes!And the best part? After all this, people watch this film and decide it is good advise for respect and self worth in a relationship! This film is all you need to know about Mormon culture: treat women badly enough that if they are told they might be a slave but at least they are expensive slave, and you might be LDS...

"Johnny Lingo" is a 25-minute live action short film from 1969, so only two more years until this has its 50th anniversary, maybe less depending on when you read this review. The film is in color and its director is Judge Whitaker. The one who adapted the original story by Patricia McGerr is Claire Whitaker and I'd be surprised if she isn't related somehow to Judge. He is mostly known for his work as an animator on several Disney classics and from his works as a director this one here may actually be his most known film, even if it is far from famous. I thinks as it is set on an island in the ocean, it is also visually fine, but if we are honest here about the story, that one also would have fit in half the running time. Contents-wise and character-wise, it reminded me a bit of a cartoon, maybe the effect of Whiaker's other works. I believe it also would have worked as a Disney animated short film for example. It's a close call, but thanks to the honorable statement on love and respect that I also mentioned in the title already, I will be generous and give the film a thumbs-up overall. There is no real greatness in here, but it is solidly romantic and touching and most of the production values are decent too. Go check it out. Final note: I won't go into detail about the Mormon references as I really know nothing about these people.

Johnny Lingo was shown a minimum of once a year at my grade school. It was light, memorable entertainment about a shrewd island trader who finds a wife for himself in a homely girl in whom he sees great beauty.We were unaware of the Mormon connection this movie had, because it had no references to religion, Joseph Smith or the Utah desert. It was insidious, though, for after three years, both student and teacher alike was heard rating other people by "cows". The highest compliment was to be an "8 Cow Woman" or an "8 Cow Man". I would not actively seek it out to shown my own child, as it does not rate as highly as the Ray Harryhausen fairy tale films, but it is well done, and conveys a wholesome message memorably.

This movie was made and distributed by the Mormon Church. But, unlike most films that fall into the above category, this movie is not about religion, missionary work, joining any church, etc. and so forth. This short film could have quite possibly been made by anyone. That is what makes it so good. It is a story about a trader coming to one of the small islands of the world to get himself a wife. The island is so small, there is only room enough for one village. There are none of the modern conveniences of the rest of the world, and everything is either built by the villagers or acquired by traders who visit the island by boat and trade for their handmade goods. In this village, it is custom to bargain and pay the father of the bride in dairy cows. This may sound like a serious film, but it really is rather quite funny and has some real classic lines to it that I'm sure will endear you to the film. The story is simple yet original and the flow and pacing for the film is perfect. If you can pick it up, it would be worth the effort.