How can I example the reality series "THE FARMER WANTS A WIFE"....lets see...It is an embarrassment and total stupidity of THE SIMPLE LIFE,the mental and all out instability of American CHOPPER not to mention COMING OUT GOTTI,the flawed planning and out of ignorance of INVASION IOWA, THE JOE SCHMO SHOW,and BEING BOBBY BROWN,and the personal humiliation of AVERAGE JOE, THE BACHELOR, THE ANNA NICOLE SMITH SHOW, BEAUTY AND THE GEEK, MISTER PERSONALITY, KID NATION,not to mention I LOVE NEW YORK,and the hilarious as hell THE BAD GIRLS CLUB with a mixture of GREEN ACRES and PETTICOAT JUNCTION. Then you throw them in all in a slop bucket,force feed it to caged farm critters the night before slaughter,and this is the base appeal of one of the worst reality shows ever put on television. Blame this on the network executives at FOX for bringing us pathetic wholesome what they've called family entertainment.THE FARMER WANTS A WIFE is the reality version of GREEN ACRES(for those you may not remember this classic rural comedy show from the mid-1960's that starred Eddie Albert and Eva Gabor)with a hint of several shows added in for measure...LOVE CONNECTION,THE NEWLYWED GAME,and THE DATING GAME come to mind. If you're thinking this is something right up the alley of THE FARMER'S DAUGHTER,you're in that league. This is a matchmaking reality show where some big city Hollywood hopefuls compete to become the wife for a mid-American farmer. The young attractive,and some of them are pretty but not very bright starlets are seen breathing in mosquitoes and black flies as they labor on the farm and other chores to do in the midday sun. And of course some of the girls do their chores in string bikinis in between digging post holes and lifting heavy bags of feed. And wearing high heels designer shoes under layers of expensive make-up? Don't be. They're be all right. It's amazing that Hollywood executives are planning a movie version of Green Acres by doing casting calls for the next Eva Gabor? Some of these girls would be perfect for the part of Lisa Douglass. Yes,these girls are somewhat pretty in looks,but completely dumb in others.Our farmer is either poor or moneyless,plain or cheap and he is no Eddie Albert neither. The farmer looks a bit like Goober Pyle or to some extent Mr. Douglass' assistant Eb or to put it mildly Jethro Bodine. He is just a good looking dude with lighter hair and better posture with not a lot of personality there which in some episodes he looks at these "girls" like an actor who is begging for attention or to some looking like Dash Riprock on the verge of acting like Jethro Bodine or looking like Mr. Haney about to do wrong in some parts.And they say that this was scripted? What script and can they act? What could possibly motivate fairly big normal city life girls to give up the easy life to marry a cheap farmer and do hard filthy labor? What would make them go from the big lights of the city to the hard living of the country? From Hollywood to Hooterville this was an attempt to see what happens next when they take a classic spin and make in reality.

*** May contain spoilers. *** Take the embarrassment of THE SIMPLE LIFE, the mental instability of A-MERICAN CHOPPER, the flawed planning of INVASION IOWA & THE JOE SCHMO SHOW, the personal humiliation from AVERAGE JOE and BEAUTY AND THE GEEK, then throw it all in a slop bucket, force feed it to caged farm critters the night before slaughter, and that is the base appeal of the new reality show FARMER WANTS A WIFE. Don't get me wrong -- I love watching all of these shows (but I also like to slow down and gawk at horrid car accidents when driving on the highway).Some might argue that in these sober times of an ongoing murderous unjustified war, White House torture programs, and the dropping of white phosphorous chemical munitions and cluster mines in civilian areas in Iraq, that the Presidential race should occupy all of our spare TV viewing time. But I say NO. Even during the darkest hours of WWII, Churchill took the time to relax with cowboy books, so why shouldn't we confused and troubled Americans watch FARMER WANTS A WIFE?FARMER WANTS A WIFE is a matchmaking reality show where big city Hollywood hopefuls compete to become the wife of a mid-American farmer. The young attractive starlets are seen breathing in mosquitoes and black flies as they labor to clean pig pens, shovel horse droppings, and re-arrange cow patties under the mid-day sun. And, of course, the girls find time to wear string bikinis in between digging post holes and lifting heavy bags of feed. Concerned that the girls cannot sport high heel designer shoes and wear layers of expensive make-up? Don't be. They do all that just fine.Our farmer is either poor and moneyless, or he is plain cheap. The farmer looks a bit like a wall-eyed Goober Beasley Pyle with lighter hair and better posture. Perhaps not all that much personality there -- at times he looks at his "girls" like an actor who has just forgot his lines. Worried what Hulk Hogan said at his son's recent trial is true -- that reality shows are scripted? Hey, let's not go there.Still, what could possibly motivate fairly normal big city college girls to give up easy living to marry a cheap farmer and do hard filthy labor? The answer is surely revealed by the Hollywood cameras. Hint. Hint.