When I reviewed "Where the Boys Are", a 1960 film about a group of college girls spending a spring break on the beaches of Florida, I pointed out that its coyly suggestive attitude to sex meant that it could only have been made during the not-quite-permissive era of the early sixties; it would have been too suggestive for 1940 or 1950 and too coy for 1970 or 1980."The Beach Girls", which deals with a similar theme except that here the beaches are in California rather than Florida, shows us just how a film on this subject would have been made in the early eighties. Sarah, a young college student, rents a beach house from her uncle, hoping to use the break for some serious study. While there she is joined by her friends Ginger and Ducky, who are far more interested in having fun than in studying. ("Ducky" is presumably a nickname, although it is never explained how she came by it or what her real name is. The scriptwriter must have been unaware that in Britain at this period "ducky" was an offensive slang term for a male homosexual). At one point one character even uses the phrase "where the boys are", suggesting that the film was conceived as a deliberate updating of its 1960 equivalent. ("Where the Boys Are" also has a major female character with an odd, unexplained nickname, "Tuggle").There are two main differences between the two films. "Where the Boys Are" is not a pure comedy; it starts off as one but introduces a more serious note towards the end when one of the girls is sexually assaulted. There is nothing remotely serious about "The Beach Girls". And "The Beach Girls" is, of course, much more sexually explicit, although even here there is a limit to its explicitness. The film-makers are always careful to stay on the right side of the thin dividing line between a sex comedy and a porno. There are plenty of explicit sex references (to say nothing of explicit drug references) but no explicit sex scenes; plenty of bare breasts and bottoms on display, but nothing full-frontal.There are a number of strands to the plot. One involves Sarah, a seemingly plain, frumpy girl who only has to take her glasses off and let her hair down to reveal herself as just as drop-dead gorgeous as any of her glamorous friends. (Spot the cliché!) Even when Sarah has let her hair down in the literal sense, however, she takes a lot longer to do so metaphorically; her main aim is to find True Love when everyone else is just looking to find True Sex. Another strand deals with the attempts of Ginger and Ducky to seduce (among others) Sarah's uncle and a third deals with the world's most inept drug-runners being pursued by the world's most inept coastguards and with what happens when their supply of cannabis goes missing. There is also a running joke about an accident-prone handyman and another about a Peeping Tom who is always spying on the girls with a telescope. As with most movies of this nature, however, the plot is not really important except as a means of achieving the film's one true end, which is to show as a group of pretty girls, and equally pretty boys, wearing as little as possible. The one exception seems to be Sarah, who spends most of the time fully dressed, only briefly stripping down to a one- piece swimsuit. Perhaps the actress Debra Blee signed up in the belief that this was going to be a quite different sort of movie; she certainly acts like it. It would be fair to say that you would not expect to find major acting talents in low-budget sex comedies like this one. The trouble with "The Beach Girls" is that you can't even find minor acting talents in it; most of the cast appear to have no talent at all. Val Kline, who stars here as Ginger, appears to have made no other films at all, and I can understand why. Most of her lines were nearly inaudible. Jeana Tomasino as Ducky is only slightly better, but she did at least go on to appear in a few other films, doubtless helped by her status as a Playboy model. The scriptwriters were just as talentless as the cast; the plot lines are feeble and the attempts at humour all fall completely flat. What I found most offensive about it was the running assumption that drug taking is good healthy fun and that if everyone sat around all day smoking pot the world would be all the better for it. In fairness to the film-makers I suppose that the strains of cannabis available in the early eighties were less potent, and therefore less harmful, than modern ones.Today, fifty-odd years after it was made, "Where the Boys Are" has taken on a certain period charm. The passage of more than three decades has not done the same for "The Beach Girls". All it has today is a certain period charmlessness. The seventies may be remembered as the decade that taste forgot, but films like this one serve to remind us that tastelessness did not end with the decade. 2/10

A dark, esoteric look at... nah, it's an 80s teen sex comedy. I admit to being a big fan of the genre. It was the one thing my Father and I ever really bonded over, and God knows the 80s gave us enough of them. Even Andrea Dworkin probably saw 'Porky's' and 'Revenge of the Nerds', but there are dozens and dozens of them out there, like 'The Beach Girls', that have slipped into the neon-soaked haze of the forgotten 80s. Anyway, the movie. The plot is... well, if you watch a movie like this for the plot, you're probably one of those people who goes to McDonald's and buys a salad. Everything is an excuse for the bevy of young women--and even the guys in this case, as there was some unfortunate sausage on display--to get nude. In that 'The Beach Girls' certainly delivers. The fact that our main protagonists are female (a rarity in these kinds of films) made it all feel *slightly* less exploitative at least.Filled with pretty girls, excessive drinking, drug use and offensive ethnic stereotypes, 'The Beach Girls' is everything you'd expect from a film of this genre. If it doesn't exactly reach the heights of 'Hard Bodies', at least it's better than 'Screwball Hotel'.

After reading all the reviews, comments and "spoilers" I'd say all of you missed the point of the movie. That there is no point! It's just mindless, let go of your inhibitions, forget about the world, fantasize about a sexy girl, "Oh, yeah! I partied like that!", nothing on at 4 a.m., debouch-puristic, voyeurism is the bomb, T & A in your face flick! (Whew!) And! Let's not forget the "Playboy Centerfold" everybody loves so much, Jeana Tomasino! Who is now Jeana Keough!(Whoo-Hoo! Divorced! Can you say, Oedipus? Not only was she in the ZZ Top Afterburner music videos(drool, drool, drool...pokies!) She did TV too t0O! The A-Team, St. Elsewhere, Cheers and T.J. Hooker! Not only did she do TV shows, she did reality TV and a little game show called Millionaire. As a celebrity question presenter? The Real Housewives of Orange County 2006, she appeared in 18 episodes. So she didn't really disappear, as some would say. Oh! Little side note here, @brannonburns...you are so Capitalized! You missed one capitalization in the second HER in your comment...just thought you ought to know(and I know you pick-knickers are checking it out now, so anal). HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! XD

Debra Blee is Sarah the straight arrow bookworm tasked with housesitting for her uncle Carl (Adam Roarke). The fact that it is a fairly large estate on the beach makes it the ideal spot for the endless parties thrown by Sarah's polar opposite friends Ginger (Val Kline) and Ducky (Jeana Tomasina). Ginger and Ducky also bring a hitchhiking wanderer Scott (James Daughton) who seems to be interested in getting to know (in the biblical way of course) the shy Sarah. Meanwhile a drug deal gone bad leaves garbage bags filled with marijuana on the beach which are found by the girls and are kindly handed out to attendees of that night's celebration. Soon, Carl is notified by neighbors to return home immediately to put an end to the hijinks whereupon he becomes instantly smitten with the usually topless Ginger and Ducky. You get the jist.Don't expect "From Here to Eternity" as this is the typical early eighties beer, boobs and beach flick that doesn't require a strong storyline in order to display the next pair of breasts, though I'm not complaining. The women are all very attractive especially the voluptuous Sarah who finally shows off her wonderful assets toward the end of the movie. Ducky, played by Jeana Tomasina can be seen on "Housewives of Orange County" as a not so svelte anymore (Then again who is?) Jeana Keough. The sideplot involving Carl and the much younger Ginger and Ducky is too much to believe even for a silly movie like this. Why would these women saddle themselves with this old man when plenty of men their age are at their parties? Future Hugh Hefner "housemates" perhaps? All things considered watching this movie is like peeing in the ocean. It gave you quick relief and nobody has to know you did it.