Loyalty. Honesty. We'll stay together through thick or thin. Friends forever, we'll be together. We're on top 'cause we play to win.The words reverberate through your thoughts, challenging the underlying foundation of your modern day belief system, and make you question existence itself.Welcome to "Miami Connection".The films producer, and leading role, YK Kim, was a savvy entrepreneur who enjoyed success in Central Florida in the 80's teaching martial arts. He wrote and co-directed this film on his own dime, and this masterpiece is a shining example of what can be achieved when one knows Tae Kwon Do and is ready for a good time.It's no secret that 1980's Florida was a haven for cocaine drug trafficking. Hollywood attempted to glorify it with TV shows like Miami Vice, and with films like Scarface. But nothing captures this moment in time and raises a huge independent middle finger to the powers that be in Hollywood like "Miami Connection".While scholars will argue the misdirection created by the films title, let's once and for all set the tone and clear the air. Bad guys: Miami - Good Guys: Orlando.It was true then, and it's still true to this day.To truly understand the gravity this film creates, first one must fully understand the essence of it's main characters.Dragon Sound is one jam-tastic rock band whose instruments don't match the synthesizer-laden sounds they make (who cares because the 80's were confusing) and throw it down frequently at Central Florida's hottest night club. (at the time I think it is called The Edge, or maybe JJ Whispers). And the bad guys are super upset because the owner of the night club is letting Dragon Sound play instead of their band. Within a few moments of hearing Dragon Sound play, its evidently clear as to why they have been supplanted. Disrupting the bad guys drug trade, as well as everything else is an afterthought. Herein lies the beauty of this masterpiece.If you are familiar with Orlando, this film will resonate eternal. Church Street, middle of the night, gang fight involving poured beer, taunts, convertibles, and action that gets spilled over onto Magnolia. "That Son of a B! Right There!" Who knew that in the 80's, the owner of Station 441 was a bad dude Korean that wore a Mickey Mouse apron and beat down punks who tried to skip out on their bill? All that's missing is Mama B's!Its all about a regional bearded crime boss named Jeff, and fingerless gloves, mullets, biker gangs paid in beer, slow motion Bruce Lee sequences , cocaine, shirtless Tae Kwon Do rock bands, tough guys, making dreams come true, aviator shades, borderline racist daddy issues, grape feeding, asking what you have in the bank, "Against the Ninjas" ala Pat Benatar, uninhibited butchering of the English language, Mid-rif t-shirts and Sport Coats, the University of Central Florida, and ninjas on motorcycles blocking your route to the airport.The musical score really stands out in this movie. One cant help but love the dark wave 80's synthesizers playing out in the train scene.YK Kim is the 1980's version of Leonardo Da Vinci. "Masterpiece" is a term that barely scrapes the surface. The International Programming Contest results are in! We made fourth place. MAKE SOME NOISE!!!If you are young, old, male, female, doesn't matter. Stop everything going on in your life. Put it all on pause and prepare yourself for the life changing experience you are about to embark upon...Miami CONNECTION

I had the suspicion that the lead actor YK Kim, who also directed the film (uncredited) and basically backed the making of the film, wasn't a professional in the movie industry, and I was right. He was a Tae-kwon-do instructor, apparently (according to here on IMDb) very popular in Orlando (though the movie is shot there and Miami) and there's even a point in the middle of this movie where everything just stops - whatever there was in the story that one could follow, if barely - and we see a demonstration of his skills. And I don't mean in a fight, I mean with him and John, played by Vincent Hirsch, demonstrating their skills in like practice mode. Not that there still isn't some requisite slow-motion cinematography of course, and (as if anticipating Zack Snyder by 20 years) sometimes going into slow-motion just briefly in a shot, and then going back to regular speed. Because you got to see that foot grab on to a dude's nose! Miami Connection is some silly stuff, but done in the 1980's, and the movie never lets you forget it. Despite Kim most likely being more into the fights than the actual filming or acting, he did know to get some production designers and just, you know, people off the streets from Florida at the time to get that 80's FEEL. The hair is there, the clothes, the music... good lord the music. There's a moment when one of the bands is playing on stage - not the 'friendship' one, the 'Against the Ninja' song with the girl singing, and I swear if you look around the room it's not smoke going up around the air, it's cocaine. It's somehow made the room smoky.There is a plot involving coke deals, and rock-n-roll ninjas, and bikers at some point, and other ninjas who looks like a lift from every other ninja movie ever made (with the fleet of black-suited ninjas with the white-suited master - because, you know, camoflauge), and characters who you kind of see some relationship going on, and then the one black guy will get a letter and pour out a monologue about his parental troubles and... plot? Perhaps it's so simple but it goes to show that the filmmaking muddies it all up. Far as I can gather is this: the motorcycle ninjas are the bad guys, smuggling in drugs, and the rock band Dragon Sound (haha) is tired of it, and their master (played by Kim) is going to take it to them and stop what they're doing for good.The French Connection this certainly is not. And if you're by chance going into it thinking it'll be any good, you will be mistaken; this 7/10 rating is in large part due to the guilty pleasure factor. Actually, that's not true in that I don't feel much guilt in laughing about this movie, and staring at times in slack-jawed disbelief at the ineptitude of things like audio dubbing of lines (it's so bad it makes The Room look professional), and the moments when in the fights (and those make up most of the running time) things just get ridiculous. Watch when any time super-violence gets into the mix, anything to do with blood and gore, and the filmmakers don't skimp on that, not in the least.But why it's so pleasurable is that there's a kind of innocence to the whole enterprise. This Tae-kwon do master just wanted to expand his horizons and try something different, and somehow with his collaborators - most of them as inept as he at making movies, but passionate about martial arts and, you know, all things 80's and wussy rock & roll (seriously, these songs, the Ninja Turtles do a better job in Coming out of Our Shells). It's bad, but you don't feel bad watching it, and with a bunch of friends at home, or with the right crowd in a theater, I'm sure it's a blast. Oh, and watch for any LONG montages, including one on a beach where they're just driving along, and they cut to a shot of a couple supposedly meant to be still on the beach... after the tide's come in!

What do ninjas, bikers, drug dealers, and a martial arts themed band have in common? Well, everything, according to 1987's martial arts cheese-fest "Miami Connection"! It's a movie that I expected to be bad, but in a good way and man was I right. The basic plot of the film-if you can call it that-involves a gang of motorcycle riding ninjas taking over the drug connection in Miami with the help of their allies. For some reason, one of the drug big wigs has a real problem with a cool sounding (At least if you like cheesy 80's songs!) martial arts band Dragon Sound because his sister's in the band. Determined to shut them down, the crooks go to any lengths to shut the group down, even going so far as to supply some thugs to a wild-haired lounge singer who has an ax to grind with the band for stealing his show time! Taekwondo master Y.K. Kim stars as the band's leader and sensei Mark and you can tell the man's never had a single day of acting class in his life. Still, that doesn't stop him and his fellow cast mates (some of whom were his students, others just some bikers off the streets) from giving it their all. Can Dragon sound prevail or are they destined to fall?It's obvious this isn't an Oscar worthy picture folks. But with that said, that doesn't mean you can't enjoy this masterpiece of cheese. I mean who doesn't find the idea of a martial arts themed band battling a gang of motorcycling ninjas hysterical? The one true cinematic praise a person can say of this is the quality of martial arts used throughout the film. The part where Kim and his students are practicing their craft on the college lawn is simply breathtaking due to the amount of skill and dedication they have. Plus, it's a treat to see them riding around in their white Thunderbird (At least I think it was a Thunderbird), serving justice to any street scum that comes their way, including the leader of the biker ninjas himself, who's just as much at home in his dojo as he is in a dirty biker bar (For some reason I really get a kick out of that scene). While watching the film, though, I'm not going to lie when I say I feel a bit sorry for Mr. Kim. By all accounts, he's a real nice guy and really wanted to do a good film. Well Mr. Kim, if you're reading this just know that while the film may not get any praise from critics, in terms of entertainment value it rocks. When it's all said and done, folks, "Miami Connection" is one for the ages. True, it's no "Ben-Hur", but then again, did you really expect it to be?

It doesn't take long into watching "Miami Connection" to come up with a sizeable list of various kinds of ineptness to be found in it. But I want to start off by listing a few positive things about the movie. It is well photographed and lit, including the night sequences. Plus, the themes of friendship and loyalty found in the movie are commendable. And I can't say that the movie is *boring*. But more often than not, the movie gets away from being boring by being amusingly inept. The acting is incredibly bad; it's easy to see that none of the cast is a professional actor. The fight sequences are awkward. The songs are awful, but catchy enough that you won't be able to get them out of your head. And don't let me get started on the motorcycle ninjas! Is this a classic so bad that it's good movie? In my opinion, no - it isn't *quite* that aggressive in its badness. But with modern so bad that they're good movies being nearly impossible to find these days, this is adequate enough to feed your appetite for cinematic silliness.