Short and sweet. I never walk out of the cinema during a movie this is the 1st I've ever walked out on. Only thing funny is how unfunny this movie is. Your eyes will bleed after watching this. You've been warned. Everyone must watch this once and Im sure 99.9% of people will agree it to be the worst or one of the worst movies of all time.

Meet the Spartans has some hot male eye candy, but to be completely honest, that's about it. Travis Van Winkle is OK in his role, he's hot, bulging with muscles, and well that's all his character is supposed to be about, so I guess it works. Carmen Electra was funny at certain times, but honestly not many. Sean Maguire is hot, handsome, manly and overly macho, and that's also all his character is supposed to be about, so I suppose he was alright, his butt is nice lol, you do get to see that in 1 scene. Kevin sorbo, wtf Is he doing in this film?!!! He went from meet the Spartans to gods not dead?! Lol, doesn't make much sense to me, but whatever floats his boat I guess. But really he seemed Sooo uncomfortable in this movie, Like he was randomly dropped on the set and didn't know what the heck was going on, maybe he's just too conservative to be in a movie like this. But anyways, there are scenes in the film that are just too gross and tasteless, and it's not funny, it's just strange and uncomfortable to sit and watch. Although the love scene between Maguire and Electra was a little comical, it wasn't hilarious or anything, but slightly comical. Really there are not many laughs to be had in this film, male eye candy is really the only upside lol.

I watched this movie as I marathoned the IMDb bottom 100, so I now how much movies can hurt. this movie does not hurt me. It has no self contained plot, and after five minutes of euphoric high caused by an almost its so bad its good, my brain adjusted to the randomness of the film I just watched it and attempted to guess the jokes before they happened for the remaining 55 minutes. My opinion on it is that it was a complete and utter waste of time, and the only reason it gets one star instead of three is that I PAID FIVE DANG DOLLARS FOR IT. I could go onto Youtube watch a summary of 300, the movie this is ripping off, then a video of a grown man crapping his pants in public, and finish it off by starring at a wall for an hour and get the same experience. They didn't even let me rent it on amazon, they made me buy it so that when I am watching a movie with friends I will have to explain why MEET THE SPARTANS is in my movie library. As a side note I watched this with two other people who both claim it was the worst movie they have ever seen and was so painful to watch one of them dropped out of the marathon. My theory is that this movie did not hurt me because I am a cynical nihilist who is not surprised that such horrors could be put to celluloid. So in conclusion I would not suggest this movie to anyone and if it doesn't cause you unimaginable pain it will leave a nauseous feeling because you will have to live the wrest of your life knowing you gave money to these soulless hacks.

After sitting through "Date Movie", "Epic Movie", "Disaster Movie" and "Vampires Suck", it has become beyond obvious that the duo of Aaron Seltzer and Jason Friedberg deserve every criticism they have received. Their films are unfunny, unintelligent and unbelievably painful. There's nothing I can say about them that would make their work any more entertaining or any less stupid. So what do I think of their "300" spoof "Meet the Spartans?" Well..."Meet the Spartans" is Seltzer and Friedberg's best movie by FAR. Guess what? It still sucks. What saves "Meet the Spartans"...Okay, um...Maybe "saves" is the wrong word. Uh...Anyways, what makes "Meet the Spartans" better and funnier than any other Seltzer and Friedberg film is that it has an EXCELLENT comedic cast. All of the actors chosen in this film seem to be chosen because they actually fit the roles and have tons of comedic presence instead of merely being chosen for star power. Kevin Sorbo has some very funny moments, Ken Davitian of "Borat" has good comedic presence and I actually found the whole concept of Diedrich Bader's character "Traitero" (A clever and actually really funny jab at action movies which make it incredibly obvious who the villain is the moment he or she steps on screen) quite humorous. That said, Sean Maguire gives by far the best comedic performance in the movie. This guy is given a script that gives him almost NO comedic possibilities and can truly turn out some hilarious moments. There are multiple scenes in this movie that would have completely and utterly failed in any actor's hands but his own. Seeing all these actors trying so hard to make this movie work despite such an atrocious script not only makes me like all of them more, it makes me hate Seltzer and Friedberg more for not utilizing their obvious talents better.The biggest problem with Seltzer and Friedberg is that they don't view their movies as actual "films" per say as much as giant feature length comedic skits. Like all of their movies, "Meet the Spartans" suffers from this problem. Because of this, the film literally doesn't go 20 seconds without a joke. Joke after joke after joke is launched at the audience, and many of them feel rushed and without effort. It was like Seltzer and Friedberg just wrote down the first jokes that came into their minds without reading them over, fleshing them out or even double checking if they fit into context. And the toilet humor...Dear God, the toilet humor. The toilet humor here is so stunningly unfunny it could sink even an otherwise excellent comedy.And if the toilet humor doesn't hurt your intelligence, then the constant pop culture references out of left field most certainly will. Apparently, Seltzer and Friedberg are people who think that a Spartan elder inspecting a baby Shrek is funny. No context by the way, the elder just inspects a baby and it happens to be Shrek, complete with a Scottish accent. If the film is extra cruel, it will combine its toilet humor and reference humor into some of the most unfunny scenes in the movie (I cringed HARD when a cat took a crap on Traitero's face after he randomly turned into Sandman)Like I implied earlier, there ARE funny scenes in this movie, saved by strong comedic performances rather than an even remotely intelligent script. The "Deal or No Deal" parody, Leonidas speaking to the Prophets about his unintentionally homo-erotic battle strategy and Xerces revealing his blue screen as a secret weapon to create more soldiers are all legitimately funny scenes. Easily the funniest scenes I've ever watched in a Seltzer and Friedberg movie, but that's really not saying anything at all.So yeah, "Meet the Spartans" is a terrible comedy. For most directors, this would easily be the worst thing they ever created. But for Seltzer and Friedberg, this is pretty much their magnum opus, and almost certainly the best you're ever gonna get from these two morons. At the very least it only made me cringe a few times, whereas I cringed pretty much every 30 seconds at "Date Movie" or "Disaster Movie."