Let's face it; most soft-core flicks take themselves way too seriously, and that's why they're often so funny in spite of themselves; it's not merely the lousy acting, the stilted dialog, pointless, ill-conceived settings and pretentious attempts at plot (what's next? "Emmanuelle Studies Quantum Physics?") If you're one of those people who (like me) simply has to have his (or her) weekly fix of "Skin-a-max" on Saturday night, it's all beside the point so long as the leading lady is easy on the eyes and the (frequent) sex scenes are sufficiently steamy. Hey! I know what I like; I may not know much about art; but I know this isn't it! "Genie in a String Bikini" knows that it isn't art either. For once, the people on the set seem to get the joke; they know they're not great actors with great lines to speak; none of them will ever get an audition with M. Night Shamalan or Stephen Spielberg or rub shoulders with the A-listers but it doesn't matter; "life's too short to be pretentious, we're getting paid; let's have some fun with self-parody!" Inside jokes and lots of cute one-liners are a hoot and make this one of the most enjoyable wisps of soft-core cotton candy I've seen in a long time! Attractive stars "get it on" with sufficient frequency, taking their time to explore a few variations (a nice athletic threesome and a tongue-in-cheek (no pun intended) girl-on-girl-with-bondage scene add to the fun). Definitely different, and certainly worth a look!

I was up late one night and started flipping through the channels. For some reason, this caught my eye and I ended up watching the whole thing. I thought it was going to be your usual late-night skin flick--you know the type---no plot, sexy women, ugly guys, bad music, the obligatory girl-on-girl scene.For the most part, I was right, but the film makers actually took the time to develop a little bit of a plot to tie the sex scenes together. The actors are good looking (even the guys, for once!), and the acting was slightly better than your average skin flick.The musical score was good, and the cinematography was decent.If you want to settle on the couch with your significant other and watch a good skin flick, I recommend this movie.

I just finished watching "Genie In A String Bikini" and I must say, it was a very funny movie. Of course, there was plenty of sex, but the dialogue kept the story (what little of it there was) moving.We begin with a genie--named Genie (Nicole Sheridan, a fairly well known hardcore actress) and a male genie named Akbar (Evan Stone, the hardcore porn guy). For having sex with each other instead of saving themselves for their masters, they're punished by being placed in containers--Genie in a bottle (of course), and Akbar in a small trunk--until someone frees them. Once freed, they're bound by their master's wishes forever--no matter what wishes they are.Now that we've got the story out of the way, hilarity can ensue. Enter Major Tony (Alexandre Boisvert) who stumbles upon both containers on a trip to a foreign country. He brings them home and accidentally frees Genie, who's willing to do whatever, if you know what I mean. Of course, he explains to her that he's engaged to Suzanne (Kennedy Johnston) and can't participate in any "genie love." "You can make love to me for hours!" Genie exclaims, giving us one of our many quotes of the movie.What Tony doesn't know is that Suzanne doesn't want to marry him for love--she wants the $6 million he's getting ready to inherit. On top of all that, she's seeing another woman on the side named Chelsea (Beverly Lynne, who turns up in just about every new softcore flick). Suzanne takes the small trunk to Chelsea, who opens it rather quickly. Out comes Akbar, which prompts Chelsea and Suzanne to look at him with nasty thoughts in their heads--time for an impromptu three-way! Tony eventually finds out what Suzanne is up to and shacks up with Genie, giving us a satisfying ending to a rather short 77-minute film.Now let's get to the sex. The sex scenes were about what I expected, given that actual hardcore actors were involved. The opening scene with Akbar and Genie getting it on was pretty nice. The two lesbian scenes were quite graphic as well. A 2 girl-1 guy three-way was even squeezed in there. So many sex scenes in a relatively short time frame, and none of them were bad.The funny dialogue helped the brief intervals between sex scenes fly by. I credit that to Fred Olen Ray, the man behind this flick (using his customary various aliases). He wrote, produced, and directed this movie, and it shows. This guy knows how to put together a screwball B-level comedy full of hot chicks and sex.In short, I'd recommend this movie to anyone who likes comedy along with their sex scenes. I consider this movie highly tapeworthy.Women: A- (Not a bad looking one in the bunch. It sure helps that Nicole Sheridan was the lead character. She played up the comedic nature of her character well. Kennedy Johnston was nice, but not extremely hot. Beverly Lynne--the most prolific woman in softcore at the moment--was her usual self, and was limited to a small part in this movie. She's not bad at doing comedy.) Sex: A (Very nice sex scenes, bordering on hardcore quality. The three-way featuring Beverly Lynne in the middle of things was one of the movie's highlights.) Story: B (Well, at least it's going somewhere. The "Story" grade also takes into account the dialogue of the movie, and that's where the bulk of the points come from. The plot itself was very weak, but the dialogue kept things moving. I liked the line where Akbar threatened to turn Suzanne and Chelsea into Milli Vanilli fans. Fred Olen Ray crafted another winner here.) Overall: A- (The whole cast worked well in this movie. Even old B-movie veteran Jay Richardson chipped in his two cents, playing Dr. R.J. Reynolds. I liked "Genie In A String Bikini" for the same reasons I liked "Busty Cops"--a film directed by another B-movie legend, Jim Wynorski. Yes, it's a softcore flick, but it's not the usual mystery-thriller softcore flick. I enjoy watching softcore comedies, and given its short running time, "Genie" is just the thing to watch in order to waste an hour quickly.)

*SPOILER ALERT* *SPOILER ALERT*I bought this DVD. "Genie in a String Bikini" AKA "The Erotic Dreams of Jeannie" adheres to the rules of B-movie economics. This movie uses almost the same cast and I think the exact same house as "Teenage Cavegirl". But while the Cavegirl was hot, the Dreams of Jeannie are flat.Oh sure, there's plenty of nudity and the usual number of sex scenes. But the cast looked tired. They all had this glaze in their eyes that said, "Too many softcore sex scenes with the same people." The only one I'll give a passing grade to is Nicole Sheridan, (Genie). She always looks like she is ready to go. She has a great set of lips and knows how to kiss. Her two scenes at the end were the highlight. "You may bite them!" But overall, this is standard stuff that's not worth getting too excited about. If you're half drunk one night and it comes out on cable, it will probably be worth a watch. But then again, what isn't worth watching when you're wasted?One last thing, Beverly Lynne needs to let her hair grow out again. Ever since she practically shaved her head, she has been dead on her feet. In this one, she's got a girl/girl scene and a girl/girl/genie-man scene and they're both shooting blanks. Let your blonde flag fly Beverly. I want to salute you again.