When the printing press was invented it spread media quicker and farther than ever before. Fast forward to the information age where written documents as well as ways of communicating went digital from the invention of the computer and then a way to connect them to others: The Internet. Writing letters turned into e-mails and inked articles went way of text on a blog. This story uses the modern way of communicating and connecting to others but as an outlet for darker reasons rather than opportunity or forward outlooks. And what makes this tale so haunting is that is was inspired by real events with some cinematic liberties altered from a 1996 case about a woman named Sharon Lopatka who went by the name of Nancy over the computer."Downloading Nancy" is about a down-on-this-world woman, played by Maria Bello, who searches for someone on the Internet that would take her life as she's tried herself with scars to show for it. Not to mention going to therapy sessions to resolve her long list of deep-rooted issues without any substantial luck. She's married and unable to have kids due to being abused and suffering physical pain as a little girl. Her husband Albert, played by Rufus Sewell, doesn't understand her need for infliction during intercourse, and after 15 years of marriage is fed up with her immature and selfish ways of dealing with problems. He has golf and other hobbies to keep himself distracted, not to mention they sleep next to each other, yet are worlds apart. Nancy finds her guy, or so he says, and takes off with only a nondescript note left over to her husband. The newly met man from online seems the perfect match to give her the rough stimulation she feels she needs. Nancy has her highs and lows, from emotional to withdrawn, giving a torn decision to the man who's now infatuated with her.Slow, serious, subtle, "Downloading Nancy" builds up by showing rather than telling how this woman got to the desperate, manic, end-all state she's at. There are loose, hand-held camera shots that put you there. Sometimes hiding behind something to give the point of view of witnessing and experiencing it first hand. The settings are dulled with drab colors and neutral furniture to give an oppressive tone without overdoing it and trying to be creepy. Maria Bello does an excellent job of playing a pessimistic woman with more than one troubling issue to contend with. Her impulsive ways make her unpredictable and unlikable, though there is a feeling of pity as she can't even help herself.This doesn't have the typical amount of hope or resolve that you see in Hollywood pictures, but it's filled with real feelings of emotion that radiate from the screen. The film doesn't have any good guys or bad guys, and it isn't a horror tale as it won't happen to you due to both individuals being willing participants. It just unfolds this strange tale of how the Internet brought these two together, who would have otherwise never met as they're several states over. Though Nancy had stacking problems that were becoming too much to handle, and this was her way of finding an answer to solve it all by including this man to take charge of her life without question. The amount of blind trust she put into him might say more about herself than him. (If you missed 'em see my profile and click chronological for first review "Grimm Love" or the second "Cannibal.") (Also submitted on http://fromblacktoredfilmreviews.blogspot.com/)

Admittedly, there were some scenes I simply could not watch. Let's face it, we who chose to view this one are probably not fans of the pat Hollywood ending. Please keep that in mind as you digest my confession that I found some scenes too viciously depraved to view. While I knew, after reading the DVD blurb, this was going to be a dark odyssey, I had no idea I'd signed up for this. Just because a movie is "the most disturbing film I've ever seen" (attribute to follow), does not mean it has redemptive value. Since 1/2 watching it, however, I simply cannot get it out of my mind. That this is based on true events should come as no surprise. Sadly, incest is not rare. Its effects linger and certainly alter a person for life. Clearly, Nancy was viciously abused as a child, and not just by her mother's brother. At one point, the audience is made aware that, upon learning the extent of her daughter's damage, her mother blames her and calls her a slut. This suggests a legacy of child abuse. Which makes me think this could have been an important movie. Not just a nightmare.Sessions with Nancy's therapist are annoying. Too little, too late. The happy-faced key to the restroom is strange. Look good (Smile) and everything is cool. No. Would a trauma specialist really be that clueless? I guess the stupid audience needs to be slapped in the face with irony. Insulting. This could have been a powerful movie-one that enlightened, rather than just shocked. Why is it that damaged men are portrayed with a certain nobility, but their female counterparts are just annoying, hateful, and pugnacious? Her character, like the entire cast, is unsympathetic. She's so over the top at times, it's almost funny-every nail, staple, sharp object-she's on it. It is filled with caricatures. Also, since when can you smoke on a bus? Point taken-she's plum lost it, but it's just another unrealistic scenario. And suicidal desperation is just not this loud. The most disturbing part of this is how shocked the audience is meant to be-and apparently is-that this is based on true events. First, that phrase is extremely loose. Secondly, are we not already aware of the staggering statistics? Thirdly, if the cited case is, indeed, the event upon which this is based, haven't the filmmakers further exploited her? I hated the voyeuristic quality of this tragic movie. That it's been described here as soft core porn (ReaLLY?) and/or S/M is further testimony that the filmmakers failed.

None of the reviews mentioned this movie being based on true events; a noteworthy fact given the disturbing storyline... The film is definitely not for everyone. It's about deeply troubled people & is VERY dark & very cold, made even more so by the meticulous art direction, camera work & editing.The cast is terrific, with a heartbreaking performance by Maria Bello who tackles her character with perfect emotional tone and tempo. It's a tough role precisely because it's so disturbing, and if overacted or otherwise played wrong, the character could become unlikeable, maudlin or self-indulgent. Bello manages to be none of these things.I didn't find the sex scenes gratuitous, or as one critic called it, "S&M soft-porn". In fact I felt the scenes were appropriately restrained. And there were many tender moments & much pathos throughout the film, including in some of the s&m scenes.As for the question of why Nancy simply didn't leave the marriage, she herself explains this when confronted by Louis with the same question. This is not the story of a woman with normal problems, marital or otherwise. This is the story of a woman who as a child was sexually abused by her uncle for a long time. And her mother exacerbated that emotional damage by blaming Nancy for the abuse. Typical of many sexual abuse victims, Nancy translated the abuse into "being loved", which compelled her to long for it in subsequent relationships. The therapy she finally seeks is too-little/too-late for someone with her type & degree of disturbance.I was okay with the ending & am glad they didn't decide to lighten things up & make it more commercially viable by going for a "happy ending" & having Nancy live happily ever after w/ Louis. That would be too Hollywood. In real life, some people simply can't overcome the pain of such prolonged and heinous abuse & end up choosing death over life as the ultimate release from unbearable pain...~NN

I imagine a lot of religious types would hate this movie and comment on it without even seeing it solely based on their beliefs, which is kind of ironic when you think about it. I would expect even most of the more secular types would hate this film because it IS hard to watch and atypical of most movies that have either a clear message or a protagonist who somehow manages to succeed.The truth is, this film is very hard to watch but is a very well made film that allows us into the world of a woman fraught with pain the likes of which I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy. Who among us could deny any living thing relief from profound pain? It seems as a species we're much more adept at causing and prolonging each others pain than anything else.In this film, Maria Bello plays very much a victim of childhood abuse who now suffers at the hands of an uncaring, unsympathetic husband played masterfully by Rufus Sewell. Every nuance and every tick is captured and sometimes shown in closeup as Sewell goes about his business with utter disregard for his wife's profound suffering.Maria Bello portrays a woman I'd expect would elicit even a modest measure of sympathy from a passing stranger and yet her husband, clearly unable, shows himself to be either a monster or yet another tortured soul, battered by years of his wife's seemingly unreasonable anguish.This is not a film I'd care to watch a second time, but I'm glad I watched it because it IS very well made. The performances are as perfect as any I have seen, while the cinematography and the score similarly show qualities that perfectly fit the story.