Checkers Goldberg (Alexandra), who apparently is the original Whoopi Goldberg, is a San Francisco-based federal agent. Her beauty and charm have led her into dangerous undercover work, such as dealing with drug-dealing scumbags like Danny Boy (Thompson). But she gets her biggest undercover job to date when she and partner Waldo Tarr (Dukes, who apparently is the original David Duke) must go to Argentina to stop big-time drug lord/talent scout Jason Hannibal (Steiger) and his army of goons such as Dozu (Tanaka). Evidently crucial to this crimefighting process is Goldberg's transformation into Cinderella Pu, a stereotype-Chinese character with a thick accent. Will Waldo and Checkers be able to bring down their criminal empire...and fall in love in the process? Yes...WALDO and CHECKERS.This movie is very, very dumb, not to mention stupid. It's directed by Joel Silberg, the director of the first Breakin' (1984). All we can say is...stick with Breakin'. Like Breakin', this movie does feature some noteworthy music on the soundtrack (such as theme song "Captive in the Heat"... not Catch the, but Captive in, for those keeping score at home) and cool 80's fashions. But the Martial Arts is pretty watered down and the humor is lame. This is surprising considering the movie was written by famous, lauded writer Stirling Silliphant.Alexandra is nice to look at, but she's no female Sho Kosugi, as this movie seems to be grooming her to be. Her line readings are so bad they're funny, but maybe it's supposed to be that way. Rod Steiger is on hand for some reason as the main baddie. It's a total paycheck role for this normally fine actor. They don't make him do anything too strenuous for fear that his wig might fly off.While this movie isn't totally without its merits, and has a nice cast, including fan-favorite Brian Thompson in a small role - yes, Yahoots Magoondi himself - and the always-lovable Professor Toru Tanaka - Catch the Heat (whatever that means) shouldn't exactly be a priority for your collection.For more action insanity, please visit: comeuppancereviews.com

At some point in the 1980's I guess the Shoot 'em up genre was considered to be guaranteed box-office gold. That fact must have been on the minds of the producers of this horribly made 1987 action movie. Instead of gold what we have here is pure Hollywood hokum. At its best, it is an extremely dated, nonsensical, wholly unappealing movie with the flimsiest of plots. At worst, it's downright racist with the female's lead stereotyping Asian women and their 'in-abilitee to no-talk-ee good EN-grish.' Rod Steiger does nothing to help, sleepwalking through his role as a South American drug smuggler / talent scout (yes,...really). The inane "A-Team" style, rock 'em - sock 'em, kung-fu action interspersed throughout the film does nothing to salvage this sinking ship. Neither does the attempt at a love story between the male lead and his Asian co-star. Even a hot, kung-fu kicking babe can't save this rambling, boring, beast of a movie from the weight of its own lumbering storyline, painful dialogue and grindhouse acting. Don't waste your time.It would be more entertaining to go down to the local Chinese deli and spend the evening watching the clerk clean the meat slicers.

This is, on almost all accounts, a routine mid-to-low-budget 80's action film, mostly set in Argentina, with its weakest point probably being Rod Steiger's totally boring, sleepwalking villain. So let's talk about the female star, Tiana Alexandra: She is VERY good-looking She has a charming smile She fills out a wet T-shirt and a tight sweater beautifully She can act (going from a foul-mouthed, no-nonsense cop to her undercover role as a naive young girl) She can dance She can fight (her ingenuity in dealing with the brick wall of a man "Professor" Tanaka inside a small room is certainly memorable)She can pose BEFORE the fight and take the mental advantage over her opponent.Basically, she's the only reason for someone to see this movie, and it's a shame she wasn't given a second break. If this one flopped, she should be the last person to blame. (**)

Yet another of those not so brilliant films about the life of a female cop. This one however, is Chinese but American raised, and she is known as something of a Kung-Fu expert (originality!). Her latest mission is to pretend to be a singer from Hong Kong called Cinderella-Poo (!) in order to infiltrate a gang of drug smugglers who hide their stash in women's breasts and pretending that they're silicon implants (!!). This bizarre plot is further complicated by the fact that one of the criminal gang has been arrested by our heroine before, and shock, horror! Her commanding officer is secretly in love with her! How will all this be resolved? Does anybody care?Well, 'Feel The Heat' is noteworthy for one thing. It features the worse use of pigeon English I've ever heard, when Miss Poo puts on her act of being an illiterate foreigner for her undercover mission. Nobody with an IQ of more than a single digit would be fooled by this pathetic facade, but these so-called professional crooks fall for it hook, line and sinker. This isn't the only situation where suspension of disbelief is essential, as our 5'5 cop policewoman starts felling huge bad guys with just one kick, and people can run for ages despite being shot in the leg and stomach.But of course, we can overlook all that nonsense if it was actually entertaining. Sadly, there's nothing here you haven't seen a million times before in better action movies, with budgets of more than a few thousand. The gunfire, the explosions and the martial-arts fights will just inspire a distinct feeling of deja vu which will last till the ending credits roll. I can only recommend it if you've already seen every other movie in the genre ever made. And just how likely is that?! 3/10