An evil djinn in clownface offers a geeky, mistreated teenager a chance to be popular, and in accepting his offer, serves as a catalyst for a series of gruesome events plaguing her school as her fellow students suffer the wrath of making their unfortunate wish, via phone text. That's how the djinn captivates his intended victims, send them a text offering a wish, the kids returning what they yearn for, and paying the consequences. Two detectives(including Dominique Pinon of "City of Lost Children" fame as a slovenly, disheveled alcoholic whose methods of interrogation aren't exactly orthodox)must uncover the reason behind the unusual body count building at the school under more than suspicious circumstances.The version I watched was only about 60 minutes so it was arranged in episodic form without Sean Pertwee's narration. Each episode features some teenager going through their own personal ordeal, wishing for something out of anger, off-the-cuff, a crisis of an emotional nature, or just because they want others to see them differently. The dark humorous nature of the movie takes no prisoners as the djinn preys on kids with hang-ups and other troubles, vulnerable and desperate.Such selected targets include:An oriental girl considered a "freak", the poor kid with acne, the fat boy whose eating habits are a bit off-putting, the nerd who so desperately desires to kiss the resident babe, the teen who wants X-ray vision to watch the female basketball team practicing naked, the struggling student fearing to fail his test who yearns to "see into the smart one's brain" getting just that, the facially scarred girl who wants to be beautiful, an anorexic who wishes to lose a "little weight", the closet lesbian who wants to look "good enough to eat" for a girl she carries a torch for, the guy who pines for his current girlfriend to have big breasts getting more than he bargained for, another wishing for the return of his step father who passed away the previous year, a girl wishing she was "hot", a scorned teen who, after catching her boyfriend getting an oral going-over by the school's most desirable chick, wishing to never see him again, a girl wishing that people could see how beautiful she was "on the inside", an obnoxious trouble-making lesbian(you'll notice that she is always bullying and ridiculing many of the victims throughout)wishes to be with her lover until they die, etc.With plenty of gore, and applied computer graphics for the more difficult effects(..such as the burning of a face, eyeballs showing up in places they don't belong, an arm gushing blood after the hand was taken off in a garbage disposal and so on). I will say that some of the practical effects are impressive enough to leave you rather taken aback(or laughing depending on you sense of humor). Most of the individual stories last mere minutes before the characters are dispatched in sickening ways. Such potent violence includes a victim falling eyes-first on scissors, a victim crushed into a wall by a van, cannibalism, a suicide involving pencils up a victim's nostrils, a car leaving a victim's stomach open and her intestines exposed, etc. The whole "mobile phone horror series" idea shows in the movie sense the length of the scenarios, and victims' various outcomes based on those wishes which sealed their fates, aren't very long. I liked this more than others it seems because I thought the dark heart of the filmmakers was in the right place, and there's a sick sense of humor involved that I found rather entertaining. Definitely low budget with some effects less than satisfactory. Some lesbianism which I thought was nice, mostly kissing, and a surprising amount of nudity(mostly leering, lurid camera shots up the legs of the girls, exploiting the short skirts the private British school seems unaffected by).

Jennifer Lim stars in this flat-liner of a horror, cast too, in films such as Rogue Trader (1999), Hostel (2005) and 27 Dresses (2008) she, amongst others, is seen parading around school in what seems to be, literally, the bear essentials. Put together by Gatlin Pictures (Darkhunters (2004) and Forest of the Damned (2005), to date), Pure Grass Films (Beyond the Rave (2008 video)) and directed by Johannes Roberts, this was first released as a mini-series that was broadcast originally via mobile (cell) phones, and then ultimately released on 18 Certificate DVD with full extended footage.Now in its entirety, and with stars as Dominique Pinon (Diva (1981), Delicatessen (1991), The City of Lost Children (1995), Alien: Resurrection (1997) and Amélie (2001)), Sean "Dog Soldiers" Pertwee and Chris Barrie (Red Dwarf's Arnold Rimmer) one would have hoped for a great film in tow, but alas, no. We can certainly see the target audience here, with the main attraction being these older teens to early twenty something's carrying their uniforms to maximum effect, with so little interest in production value, script and imagination, what merit is there for anything else? A bigger budget may have helped, after all and in all fairness, this is the two fledgling Production companies at their genesis, with hope and hindsight it may improve and no doubt, the overall experience for everyone may not have been a total waste.The narrative isn't that new, a nondescript girl (Jennifer Lim) wishes only to be more popular in school, her wish comes true via an extremely evil looking clown (not a bad effort too) who has the ability to transform peoples wishes into reality via mobile phones, hence, when evil calls. This, of course, does not go according to plan; the butterfly effect has some pretty nasty (budget allowing) consequences.The main cast here seems just as hyped, as too the short lengths of the girls skirts, then used to little effect but to add a name to the credits, then again, with only a running time of 75 minutes, it had to go one way or the other, and tails, the boys lost. It does have its moments, both of humour and fright, but they seem too dry, too fleeting and too far apart. Dominique Pinon's screen time here is tantamount to scandalous and Sean Pertwee's straight out of the rulebook script looked more inarticulate and uninspiring to say the least.We know, or should have more sense to see, that this is more than straight-to-video; this is film-making on-the-knock. We can only hope that, in time, the two companies involved and their future projects will make a handsome return. If this were not to be the case, then the unfortunate evil Clown should stay behind after school and write out a hundred times: This tried its best, but it just wasn't good enough.

This movie is absolutely horrible. If you are looking for tasteful humor in a horror movie, check out Shaun of the Dead or Slither. This movie was so painful to watch. The acting was terrible, the deaths were forced, and the janitor tried so hard to be funny but came off as just desperate and boring.The idea is that students can text their wish to a number and it will come true...literally. Most of the wishes are so contrived to push the result that you don't even need to watch the movie, you can see the wish, use your imagination, and move on. And what is up with the same corny dialogue flashing across your screen when someone receives the text message that they won a wish? This is a horrible waste of time, don't watch this movie.

It is difficult to imagine anyone making a worse movie on purpose. Even my current Worst Movie Ever Made, "Night Divides the Day," was made by a bunch of clueless college kids with home video cameras and no money. This movie was made by professionals, with real actors and a budget. Deliberately trying to cash in on the current J-horror craze (even going so far as to cast a vaguely Asian-looking woman as the "star"), the story of an evil force spreading mayhem through text messages sounds promising but ultimately turns into an enormous pile of crud. Stupid jokes, unconvincing special effects, gratuitous nudity, and frankly ridiculous and predictable vignettes. Avoid this movie at all costs, even if it means renting "Larry the Cable Guy: Health Inspector" instead. "When Evil Calls" is *that* bad.