I have spent in excess of 35 minutes searching the internet for this film's budget. I even taught myself how to read Italian in order to read this film's original Wikipedia entry, which yielded no significant results. If anyone has any information, please let me know. I am aware that perhaps this website does not exactly allow for this type of communication, but you could call me on the phone if you would like to tell me this film's budget. I mean, I can't be the only curious one. This film is absolute doo doo butter and I would be really impressed if M. Teti made this film on a budget of 35 cents, but if he were given a budget of 3 million dollars, I would be quite substantially less impressed.
... View MoreSimply, this is a truly appalling movie. It's an outright offense to all those who died in the Titanic disaster and their relatives. A group of deaths is not a topic to treat lightly. That's a disaster, not a fairy tale or a warmhearted musical.The storyline is void and lifeless. It has many plot points, but they don't go anywhere. They're just cheap, lazy, blatant rip-offs of Disney films and another things, like Cinderella, 101 Dalmatians, Lady and the Tramp, Speedy Gonzales, Sherlock Holmes, etc. The romance between the boy and the girl is completely forced. They fell magically in love. Also, the writing is poor. The jokes don't work, the dialogs are badly thought. In one scene, the people try to combat the sinking ship with buckets, something that not even Patrick Star would do. And the cheesy ending deprived all the sadness this film should have, because it's about a serious topic.The music "Holding Me" is quite good, but it cannot redeem this fiasco. The other songs are bad. The rap song is anachronistic, unpleasant and out of place. Bonus points for mocking a real life disaster. The mice song is completely dumb, lifeless and racist.The characters have no personality. They're no more than cheap knock-offs. Either they're irritant or forgettable. "Cruella"'s dog is unreasonably treated as a villain only because his owner is evil. Those Mexican mice are just stereotypes of Mexican people, specially in their song.Character design is decent, but animation is bad, lacking fluidity.Enjoyment? No. At best, you can laugh of the terrible work.Moral: Never mock a real life disaster, please.
... View MoreThis is an absolute butchering of the tragic story of the Titanic, there are so many things wrong with it I hardly know where to begin. To start with, animals, a whole bunch of Disney style anthropomorphic animals wearing clothes and carrying luggage, they even get their own gang way for some reason. Then you have the main character, a sort of Cinderella type ripoff with her stepmother and evil step sisters. There is also a Sherlock Holmes type detective, some 101 Dalmatians type crooks and a bunch of other ridiculous characters that have no place on the Titanic. Character introductions over, the ship casts of and a multitude of different subplots get on the way, the main character does her best Cinderella impression, the Dalmatians crooks bumble around trying to steel stuff and Sherlock Holmes keeps popping up everywhere indifferent disguises, but by far the strangest, and least appropriate is what goes on with the animals. One of the dogs starts rapping for no reason, spontaneously dressed in sports jersey baseball cap on backwards, the Mexican mice play an awful, slightly offensive Mexican stereotype song, full of bad rhyming, and so on and so forth. When the ship strikes the iceberg and starts sinking, it gets even worse, not only do the whole group of major characters end up in the same life boat, they even stop to pick up people from the water, the risk of tipping the lifeboat is mentioned then completely ignored. The animals even get saved by dolphins and, despite thousands of people dying, have a "yay, dolphins" moment. To top it all off, the movie ends with a happy-go-lucky, recapping of what happens to all the characters, no mention what so ever of the thousand people who died. This movie is just full of ridiculous characters, inane subplots, weird looking animation, but worst of all, the biggest passenger shipping disaster in history is played up like it's no big deal.
... View MoreNOTE: This review is based on the UNCUT version, not the choppy American version.Before I begin, I just want to say one thing: This movie IS a horrible piece of film and animation.The characters are possibly the most unoriginal I've ever seen. How unoriginal? They blatantly steal characters from other movies! Our characters include a young girl who is forced into slavery by her evil stepmother and two selfish stepsisters, a la Cinderella, two bumbling Cockney-accented thugs are bossed into thievery by a white-haired lady in a fur coat, a la 101 Dalmations, and a family of vaguely Russian-accented mice that travel to America with the youngest one constantly getting into trouble a la America Tail. There are a few other characters in this movie that might also be rip-offs(a granny, a nanny, a French singer, etc.), and they all share the same blandness and one-dimensional movement throughout the movie.The story is absolutely silly. It's basically Titanic with a lot more subplots that go nowhere. Our leads Angelica and William(switched from rich girl/poor boy to rich boy/poor girl) board the ship, fall in love at first sight, and somehow end up married by movie's end. In addition, we have subplots about Angelica's lost necklace and mother, a cat and a dog who terrorize the other animal passengers, a con artist who's trying to seduce a banker she thinks is rich, a Sherlock Holmes knockoff trying to track down thieves, and quite a few more that, to the film's credit, do get resolved, albeit rather sloppily. It's like the movie had 5 different writers writing different things and the Editor just copy/pasted everything into one script with no changes. The result is a mish-mash of stories that, although not as bad as Monster a Go-Go, still leads to a confusing mess.Let's talk about the technical aspects, aka the sound, animation, and editing. It's all some of the worst I've ever seen. The animation is incredibly inconsistent, with some scenes almost looking three-dimensional and others looking like a three-frame Flash file! In addition, there's an assortment of animated goofs to keep an eye out for(a guy growing in size as he runs, two women walking in place, disappearing clothing, and, my favorite, one of the characters walking through a table!) The sound and dubbing is really bad as well, with none of the actors sounding interested in the least. Also, some scenes apparently didn't have dialog recorded as they simply REPEAT EXACTLY WHAT THEY SAID A MINUTE AGO! Conversations, reassurances, screams, etc. are all repeated several times in the movie by the main characters! Why didn't they just cut the scenes out? Because the editing is AWFUL! A lot of scenes are repeated over and over to fill in time and some scenes take place immediately after or on top of other scenes that have nothing to do with the context! My favorite is where they play the same scene of the Second Officer THREE TIMES in 10 seconds, with only slight and painfully obvious differences in the dialog! The writers don't care, the animators don't care, and the editor doesn't care. Sounds like a great movie to me...As for the music, a lot of the soundtrack sounds like violins played in reverse all throughout the movie. It's not horrible, I guess, but strange. There are also a few songs(mostly generic tunes thrown in at the last minute), but there are two that REALLY stand out. First, there's the "You're In My Blood" song, which is probably the worst love song ever sung, even worse than most of the terrible modern pop songs you hear on the radio. Sample Lyrics: "You're in my blood, you're in my blood, you're in my blood, my bloooooooooOOOOOOOOooooaaad/So let's start this rite of love/WiiiiiiiiIIIIIIiiith love." Second, and this is the only reason most of you have heard of this movie, a RAPPING DOG! YES! A dog dressed in a Jersey, holding a boom box, dancing in front of a New York backdrop, singing a genre of music that won't be invented for 60 years! Why? What purpose does it have? Does it affect anything? Never explained. Comes out of nowhere, fades into the same nowhere, and is never brought up again! ...Well, that's one way to make a movie stand out...Now, with all that in mind, this movie... is really fun to watch.It does everything so wrong, cares so little, and insults so much intelligence, that it's actually a fascinating movie. You actually want to keep watching to see what bit of insanity occurs next! At the very least, you won't be bored by how strangely this movie was put together.In addition, there are some good things about it as well. The design of the characters, for the most part, is rather good. Angelica almost looks like a Disney Princess. A lot of the shading, movement, and even some of the slapstick is well done and well timed, so it looks like at least some effort went into this. Finally, this movie does something better than Cameron's version: It explores the ship and passengers. While Cameron tried to focus solely on the cartoonish romance of Rose and Jack, with the other characters just shoved in, the movie does give time to show the stories of each passenger, even if they are sloppy. So, in a way, this movie did something better than Cameron. And yes, give it credit, this movie also understands that the sinking was a tragedy that took the lives of many. ...Barely.In conclusion, this movie is a fun little train-wreck that is impossible to take seriously. If you're curious as to how badly an animation can be made without it being outright horrible or insulting, I'd recommend it. Just don't use it as a history lesson...
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