"Satan Returns" was actually a better movie and a better experience than I had anticipated it to be, as Hong Kong cinema are not really famous for their supernatural thrillers. Much less a supernatural thriller with Donnie Yen on the cast list.The story is about a satanic zealot named Judas (played by Francis Ng) who is killing women in his search to find Satan's daughter. And hot on his trail are the police with Mo Tin Nam (played by Donnie Yen) and Ka-Ming (played by Chi Wah Wong) leading the investigation. And Judas's next target is Chan Shou-Ching (played by Chingmy Yau).I will say that it was nice to see a story like this from the Hong Kong cinema vault, and they actually pulled it off well enough, despite the story being sort of religious rubbish. But still, it is only entertainment, and in that aspect it worked out well enough. Sadly, though, then the movie wasn't particularly thrilling or fascinating, it was downright predictable.The movie had some really good names to the cast list. And it was nice to see Chingmy Yau stand out from that semi-erotic shadow of "Naked Killer" that she have been casting for a long, long time. It was sort of odd actually to see Donnie Yen in a movie of this type, as it is not normally what he makes. And the movie was really carried by Francis Ng's performance, and he really outclassed Donnie Yen acting-wise by miles.If you are fed up with the typical action movies that comes from Hong Kong and enjoy supernatural thrillers, then "Satan Returns" might be right what you are looking for. Just bear in mind that the movie is predictable and sort of fails be build up much excitement and thrills.And as for the title of the movie, "Satan Returns", what was up with that? Where did he return from? Vacationing? But more importantly, he didn't return to make an appearance in this movie.

***Spoilers***It's not often I watch a film that I really can't think of a single positive thing to say about, but this comes pretty damn close.Sadly indicative of the decline that hit Hong Kong cinema in the 90s, Satan Returns is sloppy, generic, badly written, badly filmed (and edited) and just looks cheap as *ahem* hell.The "plot" concerns a crazed man called Judas who is searching for Satans Daughter - a task he completes by finding women born on the 6th June 1966, and cutting their hearts out. If she lives, she's the real thing and the world's in trouble.Up against Judas are the "heroes", who are the worlds worst cops. Seriously, these guys cause more death and destruction than anything Judas does just through their sheer ineptitude.There's so much wrong with this film it's hard to know where to start. The sudden shifts in tone from melodrama to silly comedy (which is common in this sort of HK film, but seems particularly misguided in a film that sometimes tries to ape thrillers like Seven), the baffling plot developments (a priest informs the heroine "oh yes, i did once see 3 sixes on your fathers neck, but I didn't want to say anything"!!!), and an ending so weak it can't even be saved by a belated appearance by Zombies - even if one of them does get it's legs cut off at the knees with a chainsaw.Overall this film is silly, boring, often incoherent, and for viewers in the UK rendered completely pointless by having the final revelation shown as a caption in Chinese that the distributors couldn't be bothered translating.Even for hardened Donnie Yen fans, don't waste your time - it's rubbish!

Now Hong Kong action movies are my one true cinematic blind spot, so I approached 'Satan Returns' with trepidation. I thought I would give it a look as it seemed it might be a slightly offbeat mix of Woo/Lam style cops'n'chops with a supernatural thriller theme. While I ended up hating this movie a lot less than I expected I still found it to be silly in the extreme, and pretty tiresome overall. The plot is incoherent nonsense about a religious nut called Judas attempting to find the Devil's daughter, and makes no real sense whatsoever. The only thing that kept me watching this to the very end was the the lovely Chingmy Yau of 'Naked Killer' fame, and some of the unintentionally funny sub-titles. Apart from that there isn't all that much to recommend this movie, and beware, the 'Se7en' comparisons are way off base, and extremely misleading.

Satan Returns ("starring the babe from Naked Killer!" screams the tag-line) is very clearly modelled on Se7en: the dark, jumpy look-and-feel is faithfully reproduced. At one point, a character suggests that the killer has "seen Se7en". But the similarity ends there. Satan Returns is a film that could only ever be produced in Hong Kong: it is a demonic thriller featuring kung-fu, gunfights, sex, zombies, and the kitchen sink. It's all very entertaining (although ludicrous) stuff. At times, it even manages to be scary. See it to believe it.