Sex, scandal, strippers and more mix in this unintentionally funny horror flick that's an absolute must for people who treasure bad genre movies.This one is in the vein of "Rosemary's Baby" and "It's Alive". Joan Collins plays Lucy Carlesi, a woman who comes to fear that her newborn is possessed. And she could be right: almost every person who comes into contact with this infant meets a horrible death.You have to hand it to British actors: they can sell just about anything, and make this train wreck more entertaining than it has a right to be. Collins does a remarkably sincere job, and is well supported by Ralph Bates, as her husband Gino, Donald Pleasence, as Dr. Finch, Caroline Munro as her sister Mandy, Eileen Atkins, as her sister-in-law Albana, Hilary Mason, as the grumpy Mrs. Hyde, John Steiner, as sleazy Tommy Morris, and George Claydon, as malevolent dwarf Hercules. Although their performances are fine, the "accents" affected by Bates and Atkins - who are playing Italians - are downright hysterical. Just get a load of the way that Atkins says the word "devil".The best moments in this thing have to be the kill scenes, which should inspire some pretty hearty chuckles. People get shoved into a river, decapitated with a shovel, and hung before this is over. There are some fleeting breast shots for voyeurs and a fairly decent dose of gore. The movie can boast *some* style, particularly in a nightmare sequence. The score by Ron Grainer is most amusing, sounding more like porno music than anything else.Picked up by A.I.P. for distribution in North America, "I Don't Want to Be Born" is a real hoot and a half. It might not be "good", but it's fun schlock.Five out of 10.

This modest popcorn thriller from Britain boasts a solid performance from that fine actress and world-class beauty Joan Collins as a former stripper who marries Italian money and ends up on easy street, London style – or so she thinks. Unfortunately her firstborn turns out to be possessed by the spirit of a demonic nightclub clown whose advances she spurned shortly before her marriage. Even before the child is brought home from the hospital he has already drawn blood from an attack on his mother. The baby's diabolical screams are technically enhanced with reverb and echo effects, as are those of his victims. Toward the end there is a strong dream sequence in which Collins, under the influence of a sedative, makes her way through her house with space, time and the relationship of sounds to their source imaginatively distorted. Eileen Atkins plays, of all things, an Italian nun who also happens to be the leading lady's sister-in-law. She doesn't quite get the accent and in general seems ill-suited to the role. The English actor Ralph Bates as the Italian husband is equally out of place. Donald Pleasence does better in his supporting role as the doctor who attends to the troublesome infant as does Hilary Mason, so memorable as the blind psychic in "Don't Look Now," as the no-nonsense nanny. The actual baby looks ordinary and does nothing but smile or cry as all babies do, but through editing tricks and cleverly applied sound effects we believe he is indeed evil. Shot in vivid color and with an undertone of urban sleaziness, it's scary, sometimes silly and somewhat naughty fun.

The Devil Within Her (1975)* (out of 4)Lucy (Joan Collins) and her husband Gino (Ralph Bates) welcome a new baby boy but right from the start they can tell there's something not quite right with him. Their doctor (Donald Pleasence) isn't sure what's the cause of his super strength and violent outbursts but before long Lucy fears it might have something to do with the dwarf that put a curse on her.THE DEVIL WITHIN HER was the AIP title given to this film, which was originally made as I DON'T WANT TO BE BORN. As you can tell from the plot, this here is basically another child possession movie, which was all the craze after the success of THE EXORCIST. No matter what you call this turkey, there's no question that it's downright awful on many levels. When you make a horror movie the main thing you're trying to do is scare people but that certainly doesn't happen here as there's not a single moment of suspense.So, what went wrong with this film? That's a good question because there's really nothing good here. What's so amazing is the fact that the horror elements are so awful as well. There's no suspense to be found and there's not even the slightest amount of tension. Another problem is that it's very poorly made and especially the various scenes where the baby attacks people. These scenes are poorly shot and poorly edited. In fact, they are at times embarrassing and especially since the baby's arms wouldn't reach some of the people that it is attacking.It also doesn't help that we're given some really bad performances. Collins and Caroline Munro share a really embarrassing scene where they're drinking and it really does seem as if they're going after each other trying to prove which one could overact the worst. Bates isn't any better in his role as the husband. Eileen Atkins is pretty good as Sister Albana and I'd argue that Pleasence was also quite good and especially since you almost made you believe the dialogue that he was saying.THE DEVIL WITHIN HER is a really, really awful movie on many levels. Thankfully it's bad enough to the point where there are a few scenes that you can laugh at. Still, the film really drags at times and there's just nothing to recommend.

Combination "Rosemary's Baby"/"The Exorcist"/"It's Alive" rubbish from the UK, released there as "I Don't Want To Be Born", is an absolutely ridiculous occult thriller without one single redeeming attribute (apart from the camp factor, as well as a devilish dwarf who pops up dressed like a court jester). Low-rent showgirl Joan Collins is cursed by the little guy after spurning his advances, which leads to the malevolent possession of her newborn infant--who packs a mean right hook!--eventually becoming homicidal. Collins, flashing some skin, looks like she'd rather be elsewhere, perhaps in another naughty adaptation of one of her sister's tawdry books. The incredulous will either scoff or stick around for the unintended amusement, though it feels rather shameful to laugh while all these actors are being humiliated. NO STARS from ****