Three out of ten stars is me being generous. Its taking me a long time to watch Encino Man, like I'm watching it in bits, not so as to absorb each scene and get the most out of my viewing, but rather I watch it in fits because it sucks to watch Encino Man. It sucks, and yet I am compelled to finish it. It's not a very long movie, I mean it's not some six hour epic, but Lord, it is a real challenge to get all the way through. I was alive and fully conscious when this movie first came out and it was ubiquitous through-out those years, yet I never saw all of the movie, some various element or agent of circumstance stopped me. Even now, when Encino Man is on Netflix and I am trying to watch it all the way through for God-knows-what-reason, I still can't finish it--I have twelve minutes left of movie to watch, longest f*cking twelve minutes of my life.

It took a pre-historic earthquake to bury him in ice, and it took the pre- cursor to the Northridge quake to unleash him from his frozen coffin. Brendan Fraser is at his zany best, putting Sean Astin and Pauly Shore to shame in this teen comedy that quarter of a century later now becomes a very guilty pleasure. The ideal of L.A. valley teenagers remains unchanged from "Fast Times at Ridgemont High" days, stereotyping California teens as seemingly eternally high, more stoned than the man from the stone age. Fraser, aka George of the Jungle, really is a blast from the past, and this time, he's not coming out of a bomb shelter. "Some of us pump and some of us slump" is just one very clichéd piece of dialog, spoken by one of the bullies who tapes Astin to the school wall. Back when "selfies" was considered a dorky thing (with good reason), Astin takes one of the threesome, from a Polaroid no less, giving the predictable sight gag towards Fraser involving the flash.My teem years were a period of my life that I am glad to be way past, and in seeing this, I am glad they didn't involve Southern California trends as seen here. Fraser speaks little except to speak in a grunt phrases spoken to him, but he is an absolute comic gem. So I can say that there is a lot to be amused by, but it has the i.q. level of a blank c.d. case. Stereotypical uncool adults look on perplexed by Fraser's behavior, although Mariette Hartley makes for a pretty cool mom. All in all, not bad, but without Fraser, this wouldn't be going in any time capsule.

One thing Brendin Frazer can pull off better than anyone else is his Tarzan style yell. He did it here, he did it well in 'George of the jungle" while swinging those vines, and he even did it with his friends in "School ties", always in a good, non annoying way, where you knew he was just a cool guy having fun. Now Sean Astin and Pauly shore in this movie are not cool. They're highschool lo-sers, as Pauly Shore said it. Pauly Shore was a popular MTV personality back in the early 90s when this movie came out and his " ma-jor" speech style was his thing. Anyway, Pauly and Astin are digging a pool in the back yard, just wishing it would bring them prom dates and popularity. So far, they've been far from it. Getting harassed by the bully and ignored by the pretty girls including Robin (Megan Ward), Sean's crush. Robin and the bully are at first, going steady (the pretty girl and the bully are going steady at the beginning of most highschool movies). Then, Sean and Pauly dig up, bum-bum-bum-bum, the caveman! Actually, just a large ice cube with a body in it. How an ice cube has been able to stay just a few feet underground in 70 degree southern California weather for a hundred thousand years without melting is just a tad bit beyond me. Anyway, Sean and Pauly let it thaw for a day. A primitive, non speaking, filthy, yelling man starts running around making a mess and breaking things. Then Sean and Pauly clean him up and dress him, and he (Brenden) then ends up somehow looking and acting cooler than Sean and Pauly. They bring Brenden to school, and he slowly starts getting them more positive attention from kids, including the girls. Brendon even defends the bully from Sean. I know all of this seems quite unbelievable and totally unlikely, but this movie was not meant to have been taken seriously. Its supposed to be a quirky, fun joke of a film. The film does not completely escape bad scenes. One scene, during drivers Ed, Brenden is driving and makes the car tilt over and drive on both right side wheels for the longest time. Yeh. Then, there's a dumb scene in a bar with some drunks acting rowdy and the police busting it up, with everyone in the bar managing to escape getting arrested except the main characters. This movie lacks any ma-jor surprises. Do Sean and Pauly get their pool ready in time for the prom? Do they get prom dates with their desired girls? Does everyone come over to their pool after the prom and now find Astin and Shore cool? Does a bear s*** in the woods?

California teens Astin and Shore want to build a pool as a way to gain popularity before the end of their senior year and find caveman Fraser buried beneath the soil in which they're digging their pool on. They introduce and groom him into the modern life of a Cali teen; and when everything seems go to as planned, the free-spirited caveman who's helping the teens build popularity, is getting a bit too popular. Fraser is a pleasure to watch, and Pauly Shore is… well, Paul Shore--this could be a good thing or a bad thing depending on your interest for watching the film. Where the film falls short is with Astin as Dave; who's a vain, shallow and selfish little punk, striving to have his own page in the yearbook… no wonder you're unpopular, Dave. Dave's tendencies of a sociopath become even more evident when he attempts to abandon the caveman because the girl who Dave likes has a crush on the caveman. It's not an overall unpleasant film, but still incredibly frustrating when one of your protagonists is extremely unlikable.** (out of four)