I don't mind watching movies that rip-off other movies. The most famous are all those '90s films which became DIE HARD on a... bus, boat, plane, train, you name it. UNDER SIEGE 2 wasn't only a rip-off, but a SEQUEL to a rip-off, yet it's one of my all time favourites for that genre. So when Van Damme's DERAILED came along in 2002, I couldn't quite believe my eyes, because DERAILED is a complete rip-off of UNDER SIEGE 2! So in some strange, convoluted fashion, that makes it a rip-off of a rip-off sequel to a rip-off. If that makes any sense whatsoever.Anyway, judging by the law of diminishing returns, DERAILED has to be a bad film, and a bad film it is. It's diabolical in all respects, but I'd pick the direction as being the absolute nadir of the film. It's no surprise that Bob Misiorowski never helmed another movie after his 'effort' here. With awful MTV-style editing, and a tendency to cut away just as things are getting interesting, he fails on all levels. Combine his sub-par effort with stock library music, boring cinematography and a reliance on silly train models that look like just that, and you have the makings for a Z-grade movie.I can usually forgive all these faults if the action in a film is decent, but it isn't here. It's laughable, with filming so bad that you don't have a clue what's going on. Van Damme isn't to blame; he looks great here, tough and in full health, but the fights are so poorly staged that they offer nothing in the way of excitement. There are a few familiar cast members, including an oddly-scarred chief villain out of THE BOURNE SUPREMACY and the return of the guy who played the Russian assassin in MAXIMUM RISK, but the rest are utterly poor non-actors or bimbos.Probably the worst thing in the film is the CGI work which offers worse animation than you'd find in a modern-day computer game. The motorbike scene on top of the train is the absolute worst (not to mention the hilarious factual error which sees Van Damme jumping his bike on to a passing train going in the opposite direction, continuing to speed along it before jumping off) but there are other bad bits involving cartoon helicopters, rubbish explosions, and a general lack of imagination and effort all round. DERAILED is a so-bad-it's-bad type of film, worth a few laughs but little else, and I certainly won't be going near it ever again.

The beginning knocked it off. In 2002 it seems, that we all here in Slovakia drive cars from 1970's, there are red-berets and barbwire everywhere and we hunt mammoths for dinner :-D. Why to create such image of the post-communist country? It's been at least 10 years past the era when this title was in production. Doesn't make sense at all. Not to mention that almost none of the scenes were actually shot in Bratislava (I believe it is Sofia, Bulgaria).The entire movie is so bad I don't even care for commenting extensively. Inaccurate set, awkward action scenes, poor characters, idiotic story. Full of completely non-sense artificial constructs, shallow and predictable plot. The only thing that made sense here was Jean Claude Van Damme and what you expected of his performance while he attempts to save the day. Otherwise, just bad. If you value your time, avoid watching this title (which I wouldn't even dare to call a decent movie)!

NATO operative Kristoff is summoned into action, to track down Galina Konstantin, who has stolen an extremely dangerous top-secret cargo.Finding her doesn't take long, and he must wrap up the mission by returning her and the contraband to his superiors by train.Galina's ill-gotten gain is three vials of SP-43, an ultra-virulent strain of smallpox, that contains several other pathogens.A group of terrorists, led by Mason Cole, intend to hijack the train and steal the virus for their own ends....Even though the film is silly and defies belief, it really doesn't deserve the poor rating it holds on here. The effects are bad, and the models look like models, but it's Van Damme, and he always delivers.It's basically Under Siege 2 with the flu and a very stereotypical cowboy and Brit, but it entertains.The bad guys are ridiculous, especially Coles lead henchman, who just sneers throughout the film and looks like Seal.Van Damme himself has been better, but he's bee worse, and if you want a typical straight to DVD film with Van damme, you know what to expect.all in all, not great, but a fun little movie.

Jacques Kristoff (Van Damme) is a family man with a wife, a son and a daughter. He is given a mission by his superiors to track down a mysterious woman named Galina Konstantin (Harring). As it turns out, Galina is hiding a deadly bio-weapon - a mutated form of smallpox enhanced with other, newer pathogens. This is discovered while Jacques is escorting Galina on a train from Bratislava to Munich. Things really get complicated when a gang of terrorists headed by Mason Cole (Arana) hijack the train and attempt to steal the smallpox. In the ensuing confusion, a vial is broken and it goes into the ventilation system of the train, making a lot of people sick. Not the least of which is Jacques' family, who surprised him by showing up on the train. Can Jacques save his family, stop the bio-terror from spreading, combat the terrorists, convince his wife he's not cheating on her with Galina, and save the train from getting DERAILED? Unfortunately, Derailed is stupid, junky, and is just plain filler in the career of Van Damme. Sadly, despite the presence of Van Damme, this movie isn't really much different from any other Nu-Image or Millennium production. It has loathsome CGI, including CGI sparks, and is edited from probably countless other sources (which would explain why certain things may seem familiar if you've seen Direct Contact, 2009). Speaking of editing, there are a lot of dumb, unnecessary editing effects that call attention to the cruddiness of this production, instead of covering it up, which we assume was the original intention.Basically this movie is a ripoff/mishmash of movies such as Die Hard (1988), Speed (1994), The Taking of Pelham 123 (1974), and even Strategic Command (1997). But the most obvious "influence" is surely Under Siege 2: Dark Territory (1995). Clearly messing with perfection, the filmmakers must have watched that and said, "the only thing that would make this better is if Van Damme was in it and not Seagal!" And while Derailed doesn't add much new to the formula, it does have a cool scene where Van Damme rides a motorbike on top of the speeding train. But even this movie highlight didn't live up to its potential.Stunt coordinator Mike Kirton, who also worked with Van Damme on The Quest (1996), probably wished he was back working on Heat (1986) and Malone (1987) with Burt Reynolds in the good old days.Also featuring a guy who looks exactly like Joe Don Baker as the stereotypical Texan, and the baddies in red berets and fatigues that are more common in Nu-Image movies than Star Wars stormtroopers, we can't forget the main title rap song, which is catchy and it seems like the uncredited rappers must have watched the movie to formulate their lyrics. I wonder if they found it challenging to fulfill their mandate to write a rap about a movie that has more obvious miniatures than most kids' train sets.Derailed is not a standout moment in the storied Van Damme career.For more insanity, please visit: comeuppancereviews.com