...It just ain't that good. Prolific B movie director Fred Olen Ray has certainly done better. Despite the efforts of a very solid B movie cast, it fails to ever be as much fun as it should be.Part of the problem is that Ray never is able to get much momentum going. "Alienator" plods too much for this sort of thing, it's full of nondescript characters, it's not much for continuity, its special effects are something less than special, and when all is said and done it ends with more of a whimper than a bang.Too bad; the premise had some potential. A typically dull Jan-Michael Vincent plays a cranky warden on a prison spaceship who has one of his prisoners, a rebel leader named Kol (Ross Hagen) escape from him. So what he does is send Amazonian 'hunter unit' The Alienator (played by female bodybuilder Teagan Clive) after the fugitive, who's crash landed on Earth and made contact with some hapless Earthlings, including forest ranger Ward Armstrong (John Phillip Law).Clive is quite a sight, and she does what she has to do well enough, although her character is nowhere near as cool or memorable as Arnold Schwarzeneggers' The Terminator. Her right hand and arm are encased in a laser weapon that weirdly sets its first victim on fire but then just makes the rest of the victims disappear.The assemblage of talent here is truly impressive: also in the cast are P.J. Soles (wearing an oddly revealing outfit), Dawn Wildsmith, Richard Wiley, Jesse Dabson, and Dyana Ortelli; Wiley plays the most utterly insufferable of the various humans. Fox Harris (to whom the movie is dedicated) and Hoke Howell play a knuckle head pair of hunters, and it's a treat to see such veterans as Robert Clarke, Leo Gordon, and Robert Quarry (although Quarry, sadly, doesn't get to do a whole lot.) Horror fans will be delighted to see Joseph Pilato (a.k.a. Captain Rhodes from Romeros' "Day of the Dead") in a small role as a technician.The location shooting in Topanga Canyon is fine, but otherwise this movie is underwhelming. Ray just doesn't give it much pizazz. If you're a very undemanding schlock lover, you may get some entertainment out of it, but it will likely bore most other viewers.Five out of 10.

Evil prison inmate Kol (essayed with hammy brio by Ross Hagen) escapes to Earth after breaking out from a remote space station penitentiary. The warden (a seriously cranky Jan-Michael Vincent) sends an unstoppable assassin known as the Alienator (beefy butch bodybuilder Teagan) to take Kol down. Boy, does this cruddy low-budget sci-fi clunker fail to hit the mark: The ham-fisted (mis)direction by Fred Olen Ray, plodding pace, a shabby script by Paul Garson, lots of comically bad acting, ineptly staged action set pieces, tacky (far from) special effects, dopey humor, tin-eared dialogue ("Your lover boy is burnt toast by now"), mild gore, and a crippling lack of both tension and vitality ensure that this honey ain't ever going to be reappraised as some kind of unjustly maligned lost classic. Chuck Cirino's mechanically bouncy score doesn't help matters any. On the plus side, John Phillip Law tries hard as rugged game warden Ward Armstrong, P.J. Soles shows off some tasty cleavage, Hoke Howell and Fox Harris provide a few laughs as a pair of bumbling idiot poachers, and Leo Gordon chews up the scenery with lip-smacking glee as gung-ho two-fisted Vietnam veteran Colonel Coburn. A real schlockfest.

For the initial 20 minutes or so (I was watching it on a PS2 so I've really no idea how long it took) Alienator sets up an interesting premise. I don't think I've seen a slasher movie with an alien from another planet as the baddie before. However, interest soon turns into stunned disbelief as you realise the 'alien' is a huge body-builder woman in a steel bikini. Yes, Alienator is patently ridiculous.Don't think I hold that against it. In the world of shlock-horror, patently ridiculous can often be a good sign. However, the blatant stupidity of its premise is all the movie really has going for it. Alienator is funny as hell, but it is also a shambolic suckfest of the highest order. Actors heap on failed attempts at seriousness, potentially genius lines of pure cheese dialogue are stumbled over with unnerving incompetence and the direction fails to sum up even one or two decent set-pieces. By the time the movie's finished you can barely see the original concept through the haystack of total tripe the team piled on it.Add to this the fact that the 'Alien' just kills people by vaporising them, as opposed to doing any 'slashing' as such and you have a giant throbbing heap of good ideas being left to rot. You'll laugh at Alienator, but AT it, not with it. If that's your thing then go ahead and check it out.

This movie does not look like it was made in '89 or 88, it looks like a mid eighties movie, I was a little surprised when I seen that it was released in '89. The acting is typical of a mid '80's movie and same with the effects, but this is my favorite thing about this movie. I love 80's movies and this one is great, it has some comedic moments and the typical futuristic look on the space ship. I really enjoyed this movie all around, Fred Olen Ray is great low budget Director and deserves some more recognition for his work.If you don't like cheesy 80's movies then don't rent this one, but if you are like me and like to have a good time watching some classic 80's cheese, then rent this movie, you will have a great time.