As a long-time fan of British horror of the golden age, from the 1950s to the 1970s, i have always has a special fondness for the 'portmanteau' form of storytelling. Usually comprising three to five short stories interlinked by a framing story, this device was well used by Amicus films in such gems as "Asylum", "The House That Dripped Blood" and "From Beyond the Grave".This BBC Christmas offering from a couple of years ago revived the format that has, i suppose, lain dormant since '80s US revivals such as "Creepshow" and "Tales from the Darkside". Written by actor and writer Mark Gatiss - no slouch when it comes to knowledge of the sinister side of the silver screen as his "History of Horror" documentaries proved - this tells us three tales involving the history of the sinister Geap Manor, relayed by a sinister museum curator (Gatiss) to a schoolteacher (Lee Ingleby).The first story is set in one of Gatiss' favourite historical periods (at least going by League of Gentleman sketches and his Doctor Who story "Phantasmagoria"): Georgian Regency England. Philip Jackson plays the vile Bloxham, a mercenary capitalist who gets his comeuppance when his cherished new wainscoting turns out to be made from the wood of Tyburn gibbet and inhabited by the restless souls of hanged men. This story generates a nice period atmosphere, helped by supporting performances from Julian Rhind-Tutt and Andy Nyman, but not very much fear despite the best efforts of Jackson and the sound designer - going for a "The Haunting" type approach that sadly fails to come off.The second story as far superior, some 1920s set whimsy at a party full of Waughian "Vile Bodies"-style Bright Young Things that slowly creeps into a tale of hushed family secrets, betrayal, and vengeance from beyond the grave. The legendary Jean Marsh, no stranger to the time of Charlestons and "Topping, what-what", appears as the grand dame of the family. I must confess, however, that my own attention was distracted somewhat by the gorgeous Anna Madeley as the haughty and snooty Katherine in her Cleopatra outfit. Ding dong, filly.The closing tale of this trilogy of terror is a continuation of the wraparound story, as Ingleby's character finds his antique doorknocker, having once adorned the threshold of Geap Manor, has turned the doorway of his suburban Barratt Home into a portal into the past. Ingleby's growing sense of fear and panic as the tale wears on is almost palpable, and when the horrific Abomiation appears in his front hall, crouched in the shadows before advancing like a Fuseli nightmare sprung to life, genuinely managed to spook this veteran of horror. While the revelation of the true nature of Gatiss' "caretaker" character and the twist ending are quite workoutable (is that a word? It should be), it is, as always, the journey that is important rather than the final destination.A cold collation to chill the cockles at Christmastime.

CROOKED HOUSE is a fun ghost trilogy from writer/actor and horror aficionado Mark Gatiss and made as a modern BBC Ghost Story for Christmas. In actual fact, the inspiration is more clearly the genre of portmanteau horrors made by Amicus during the '60s and '70s of which TALES FROM THE CRYPT is a good example.This three parter is based around a Tudor mansion with a haunted reputation, told by a museum curator in the present day played by Gatiss himself. While the cheapness of the TV production is sometimes apparent, Gatiss' love and respect for genre makes this an anthology impossible to dislike.The first story is my favourite. Set in the 18th century, The Wainscoting is a traditional haunted house piece with clever details and a suitably frightening spirit manifestation. Philip Jackson gives an excellent performance as the gruff stock trader heading towards a cruel fate and the vibe I got from this was spot on. The second episode, Something Old, is less successful, it's a story of a family curse that features too little horror and too much exposition. The last story, which I think is just called The Knocker, is on firmer ground and delivers a mildly spooky modern-day haunting.This is all topped off with a pleasing twist ending which will be familiar to those who have seen and enjoyed the likes of DR TERROR'S HOUSE OF HORRORS.

What a wonderful, creepy and intriguing tale Mark Gatiss has presented for us here with the marvellous Crooked House.Set over three consecutive episodes, this story tells the tale of Lee Ingleby who plays a man who has unearthed an unearthly door knocker from his garden and goes to see the Cuator (Mark Gatiss) of an old museum who sheds light on its gruesome past of the now demolished Geap Manor.The supporting cast in this production is superb with Jean Marsh, Phillip Jackson, Andy Nyman and even a fleeting cameo from the magician Derren Brown as a shadowy character.I shall not give anything away as the plot is so intriguing it would spoil the ending. I'd recommend this drama for anyone who loves a good scare. I hope to see a few more episodes from Mark Gatiss as this format fits in perfectly for a full series of spooks and scares which would echo that of 'Tales of the Unexpected'.Ten out of ten!

Crooked House is set in modern day London where history teacher Ben (Lee Ingleby) has unearthed an old rusted, decaying door knocker that he has taken to a local museum where the curator (co-producer & writer Mark Gatiss) who show's an interest in the knocker says that he believes it came from the infamous now demolished Geap Manor. The curator goes on to say that the Manor has a bad reputation, Ben is intrigued & wants to know more so the curator tells him two ghostly tales all set inside Geap Manor...The first of the tales is called 'The Wainscoting' set in Georgian times during 1786 as rich businessman Joseph Bloxham (Philip Jackson) moves into the newly refurbished Geap Manor only to start hearing terrifying sounds coming from inside his brand new wood panelling...Next up to be told is 'Something Old' which is set during 1927 as a swinging costume party takes place in Geap Manor. Young heir to the estate Felix de Momery (Ian Hallard) announces his engagement to the beautiful & young Ruth Sykes (Jennifer Higham), soon after Ruth starts to see a mysterious woman dressed as a bride at the party & soon discovers a dark family secret that threatens both her & Felix...The curator then turns down the door knocker & Ben leaves. Ben now becomes the center of the third & final story called 'The Knocker' in which the evil legacy of Geap Manor finally catches up with the present...Originally shown here in the UK over three nights as three separate thirty minute episodes Crooked House has also been edited into a feature long omnibus horror anthology with the three stories running concurrently. However you see Crooked House I suppose it amounts to the same thing, it's a Tales from the Crypt (1972), Asylum (1972) or The Vault of Horror (1973) style horror anthology show in which three different ghost stories revolving around the same Manor house are told by the curator of a museum in the films linking wraparound segments. Each of the stories is set in a different & distinct time period & to be honest things get off to a poor start with the opening story The Wainscoting set in 1786, this is a forgettable bog standard haunted house story in which the new owner of a property hears ghostly noises & sees the odd ghostly happening before meeting a grim fate. This is pretty clichéd right down to the superstitious locals although I did like the plot revelation that the panelling in Geap Manor was made from wood taken from a set of gallows & the spirits of the men who hanged on it still haunt the wood, it's a potentially neat idea but nothing is done with it & the so-called twist ending in which Bloxham commits suicide by hanging himself is very predictable. Unfortunately things don't really improve with Something Old either, the first twenty odd minutes of this story is a total snooze-fest with the announcement of the engagement, a lot of forgettable dialogue & an odd out-of-place gay sexuality subplot that goes nowhere before a very rushed last ten minutes or so as the script tries to cram in as much exposition as possible about a tragic wedding that still literally haunts the Manor. Again Something Old is very standard stuff & actually feels like a bit of a rip-off of the Amicus horror flick --And Now the Screaming Starts! (1973) which also features a newly wed bride being terrorised by an old family curse at an English Manor house. Things improve considerably with the third & final story called The Knocker which is set during the present & involves Ben himself. There are actually one or two creepy moments in this one including a cool Rosemary's Baby (1968) moment. The Knocker actually has a couple of neat twist's & a good ending unlike the previous stories & feels the most horror orientated out of the three. None of the three stories are particularly great with the first two being rather poor but as a whole it's watchable I suppose & there are one or two nice moments to be seen & the final twist isn't too bad to be fair.The production values are fine, it looks a bit cheap at times & a little bit too staged but it's alright. Unfortunately there's a distinct lack of atmosphere which is a big problem for a supernatural horror anthology like this, there just aren't enough creepy moments in it. There are a few cheap jump moments like when the soundtrack is silent an alarm or telephone suddenly goes off, you know the sort of fake horror film scare that gets annoying. There's also a lack of any gore or violence, despite being shown fairly late at night this could probably pass for a PG rating. The acting is OK from a reasonable cast.Crooked House as either three separate parts or one big one edited together is nothing more than an average supernatural anthology show/film that didn't do much for me at all. Only the third & final story is worth watching to be honest & a lack of genuine scares, twist's, imagination & gore ultimately sink it without trace.