Wrestlemania IX begins with well enough intentions, what with Shawn Michaels and Tatanka battle in a pretty crisp match. After that, however, the event takes a nosedive, with no matches even approaching entertaining until the Yokozuna/Hart finale (and even that is ruined by a Hulkster-sized ego).Usually on an event like this, I list my personal highlights. For this WM, the only "highlight" at all is the debut of Jim Ross at the microphone. Even that, though, is set off by the horrific "commentary" by Randy Savage. He should never be allowed near a mic after this debacle.Some of the other "lowlights" include:-Giant Gonzalez vs Undertaker, quite possibly the worst match in WM history. What a joke Gonzalez was. -The stupidity of "The Narcissist" Lex Luger character. You have to have the malleable mind of a child to find him at all appealing either as heel or babyface. -A match like Razor Ramon vs. Bob Backlund, two wrestlers who should have really "popped" at the vent, but instead just fall flat.Finally, the inflated ego of Hulk Hogan, which deserves a paragraph all its own. Clearly, the Hulkamania Era had run its course by this time. Hulk suddenly looks a lot less mammoth (gee, could that little steroid scandal have had something to do with that?), he has to tag-team with a gimmicked ("face-shield") Brutus "The Barber" Beefcake, and he even comes to the ring with a swollen shut eye (a jet-skiing accident...or getting punched by Randy Savage over accusations of an affair with Miss Elizabeth?). Yet, even with those signs so clearly written on the wall, Hulk refuses to let Bret Hart "get over" and set up a mega-confrontation down the road. Nope. Instead, in a rather pathetic moment, he steals the spotlight all to himself. There is a reason he will be nowhere to be found on the next WM card.The only reason I give this event two stars is because of a slight childhood nostalgia factor (I got sucked into Doink, Crush, Tatanka, etc.). Other than that, though, this is the worst WM since the inaugural event.

1993 was a time of change in the WWE but for this Wrestlemania they decided to wind back the clock as Hulk Hogan returned, along with his good friend Brutus Beefcake, who had been out of wrestling since a paragliding accident in 1990.This was not a great event. Only two matches had any real build and the whole thing came off as being rushed. The in ring action wasn't great and the twist at the end, which I'll discuss later, really wasn't the earth shattering moment the WWE hoped it would be.This forgettable night started off with Shawn Micheals defending his Intercontinental Championship against the undefeated Tatanka. Tatanka had beaten Michaels a couple of times leading into the fight. Michaels had a new manager, Luna Vachon while Tatanka was accompanied by Michaels' former manager and future WWE Hall of Famer Sherri Martel. Tatanka won by DQ. Michaels kept his title and went straight back into his feud with Marty Janetty, which had been put on hold just for Wrestlemania. Why, I have no idea.Next up saw the Steiner Brothers (Scott and Rick) defeat the Headshrinkers (Samu and Fatu) with Scott scoring the pin after hitting Samu with the Frankensteiner. Good match.Doink the clown needed help from another clown to win his match against Crush. A second Doink distracting Crush when he was in complete control and allowing Doink to get the pin and the victory. Doink was an entertaining gimmick character, who got old rather quickly.Razor Ramon easily defeated the returning Bob Backlund in the next match.This brings us to the first in our double main event. As the Mega Maniacs Team of Hulk Hogan and Brutus Beefcake, with the newly turned good guy Jimmy Hart in their corner, took on Hart's former buddies Money Inc (Ted DiBiase and Irwin R Shyster). This was a fairly sketchy finish. Beefcake, as mentioned, had been in a paragliding accident requiring full facial surgery and had wrestled the match with a face mask on. Shyster ripped the mask off him and beat Beefcake to a pulp. The ref went down, Hogan grabbed the face mask and knocked out DiBIase and Shyster and then Hart, who was wearing a referee shirt, counted the three. Another ref came down and reversed the decision, declaring Money Inc winners by DQ.Next up Lex Luger or the Narcissist as he was also known at the time defeated Mr Perfect. This match came about because Luger was being managed by Perfect's old manager Bobby Heenan. Perfect had is feet on the ropes when he was pinned, but the ref missed it.The Undertaker picked up a lacklustre DQ victory in a pretty poor match against the Giant Gonzales. THe Undertaker had earned the ire of Gonzales' manager Harvey Wippleman in 1992 and Taker had defeated his big monster Kamala at Survivor Series. Wippleman vowed revenge and took it at the Royal Rumble as Gonzales attacked Taker, costing him the match. Gonzales dominated Undertaker in this match, but was DQ'd for choking Taker out with chloroform. Weird finish to a bad match.This bought us to our main event as WWE Champion Bret Hart, seriously challenged as champion for the first time, put his title on the line against Mr Fuji's unstoppable monster Yokozuna. Yokozuna controlled the early going, but Hart resisted and then took control. He had Yokozuna in the sharpshooter, surely he would give in and Hart would be established as an heroic hero after taking out the big monster. But Fuji had other ideas, throwing salt in Hart's face, rendering the Canadian helpless as Yokozuna got the pin.What a downer ending. But wait here comes Hulk Hogan. He's checking Hart to make sure he's OK. Suddenly Fuji challenges Hogan to a WWE Title right then and there. Hogan accepts. Fuji throws salt towards Hogan, but hits Yokozuna instead. Hogan hits the leg drop and wins the match and the title. What did I just watch? And so, what most fans thought was going to be the night we either saw Hart establish himself as a giant killer, or Yokozuna establish himself as an unstoppable monster, we instead saw Hulk Hogan pick up a meaningless title win. A title that he would not defend for three months. As a matter of fact this was the only match Hogan wrestled for the WWE before the King of the Ring PPV in June 1993.

The worst Wrestlemania ever.This had no must see bouts and many crap ones at that. This took place in Las Vegas and WWE made it's employees dress up like Egyptian gods! They even changed Howard Finkels name to Finkus Maximus, which probably doesn't mean anything. The sight of seeing Jim Ross in that terrible gown still gives me nightmares to this day and I'm 21 years old, so you could imagine it when I was 7 years old! Bobby Heenan was funny though.Matches included The Undertaker vs Giant Gonzales in a p*ss poor match, The Headshrinkers vs The Steiner Brothers in a useless match, Doink vs Crush in a comedy match and a boring match featuring Razor Ramon vs Bob Backlund. Hulk Hogan teamed up with Brutus Beefcake to battle Money Inc. You could clearly see Hogan had a black eye. In storyline purposes Ted DiBiase and IRS beat up Hogan while he was playing poker or something like that in the casinos, which is a poor storyline, but in reality, Macho Man Randy Savage hit Hogan because Savage thinks he's like The Hulk (no pun intended) no not the wrestler but the film character.The main event consisted of Bret 'Hitman' Hart facing off against Yokozuna in a very boring main event match. Mr Fuji threw salt in the face of Hart and Yoko won, but not until Hogan came down and squashed Yoko in 21 seconds.Overall Grade - E

This was without a doubt the best Wrestlemania of it's time period. That period being the first half of the 90s. This is of course just my opinion. Being one of only 2 outdoor WWF events (and the only outdoor Wrestlemania) this one had a distinctive look that sets it apart from the others. It also had the smallest crowd of any Wrestlemania, since Caesers Palace doesn't seat many people. There is one big flaw here, though. The cheesy "Ancient Roman Times" theme. All the commentators were forced to dress in togas and enter the stadium riding on camels. WWF promoted the show as "The World's Biggest Toga Party", and hoped the fans would wear Togas too. That didn't happen of course. What fan would want to humiliate themself on live Pay Per View by wearing a bed sheet? Jim Ross and Bobby Heenan were the only fools dumb enough to do that.Getting past the cheesy theme, the rest of the show was fantastic. Tatanka and Shawn Michaels kicked off the show with an entertaining IC Title match that went almost 20 minutes. Lex Luger and Mr. Perfect were brilliantly matched opponents. Their match ended with Luger nailing Perfect with his Running Forearm, which WWF promoted as being an illegal weapon due to Luger's steel plate he had surgically implanted. Who else remembers that gimmick? Undertaker and Giant Gonzalez's match was a great show. It would have been entertaining even if they just stood there. Seeing the 6'10" Undertaker in the ring with the over-7 foot tall Gonzalez was a sight to see. Of course Bret Hart delivered an amazing math as always, against the challenger Yokozuna. It seems to be a forgotten fact that Yokozuna was the fastest rising World Champion ever. It took him only 5 months in the WWF to take the belt. Bret was an averagely sized 230 pound man, and Yokozuna was 500 pounds, which makes them an unlikely pairing. But both make the match work.Ultimately there is one reason above all else to rent Wrestlemania IX. That reason is DOINK THE CLOWN! A sadistic and violent evil clown. When I think professsional wrestling, sadistic and violent evil clown is what I think. Rent Wrestlemania IX and you get 2 Doinks for the price of one. I'm sure I'm not alone in saying that's the highlight of Wrestlemania....... maybe I am alone in thinking that. Who cares. DOINK RULES!