A giant mutant weasel terrorizes a small town in Long Island. Mad scientist Dr. Sendam wants to use the weasel's regenerative blood in order to achieve immortality while an intrepid government agent tracks down the foul flesh-eating beast.Man, does this uproariously awful atrocity possess as the right wrong stuff to qualify as a real four-star stinkeroonie: We've got hopelessly ham-fisted (mis)direction by Nathan Schiff (who also wrote the nonsensical script), a slapdash narrative that plods along at a poky pace, lovably lousy (far from) special effects (the weasel puppet in particular looks uproariously fake), rank amateurish acting from a lame no-name cast sporting heavy upstate New York accents, oodles of cheesy over-the-top gore, ineptly staged monster attack set pieces, a cornball film library score, and ratty cinematography. Sure, this one is pure micro-budget schlock, but it nonetheless possesses a certain endearingly cruddy ramshackle charm that's impossible to either resist or dislike. An absolute hoot and a half!

This movie is a total piece of junk. It was shot on what looks like 8 millimeter film(not sure though). It looks like it was somebody's student film. I think that this is the worst movie I've ever seen, and I've seen some pretty bad movies. I can't believe that this movie is out on DVD, it's so bad. The plot has something to do with a giant rabbit or something, I don't know. I pretty much fast forwarded through the movie because it was so unbelievably bad. This movie has to be one of the worst ever made. I believe that the sound quality is bad and messed up too. The movie also had bad edits, I believe and poor special effects. I guess that the movie would be decent for a student film. They say that Ed Wood's movies are bad. This movie makes Wood's movies look like "Casablanca". It's a no-budget movie. I would recommend this movie to people only for them to see the world's worst film. It should have remained buried. Take care.

This Nathan Schiff is a genius. This is not to be confused with Mothers Of Inventiveness corny album released 10 years prior to this wonderful film. NO! I still drink Lowenbrau. I will buy ANYTHING this man writes!! Nathan "The Genius" Schiff has carefully culled bright young actors, all of whom I am certain will rise to stardom in a very short time, a coaxed masterful performances from each of them!! And it is NO SECRET that Nathan "The Jesus Of Movie Magic" Schiff has taken the same actors and has yet encouraged sterling performances from these Oscar winners to be in his other stupendous sensations of the celluloid supremacy!!!

So, you're thinking of watching Weasels Rip My Flesh, are you? Well, ask yourself this - how much pain can you take, bucko? 'Cause this ain't no ordinary film, no sir. Y'ever see one of those "outsider" art shows - the paintings with the cheap materials, crude figures, no perspective, and weirdly distorted sense of space creating an effect only slightly better than what's posted on grandma's refrigerator, and the highest praise you can muster is to commend the artists on their determination in the face of their obvious lack of talent or training? This is the cinematic equivalent.Normally, this would be the point where I would give a little recap of the plot, but that's not really possible, as there isn't much of one. There's lots of nice, loooong shots of trees and brush, interspersed with scenes involving characters doing senseless things and then dying or otherwise dropping out of the film entirely. But, basically, a weasel is exposed to radioactive slime from Venus (don't ask), and goes around killing people. Then two Agents show up and fight with an utterly non-scientific-looking Mad Scientist in the least-laboratory-looking laboratory set I've ever seen in my life. The Mad uses weasel blood to change Agent Sidekick into a gray carrot-creature, the monsters fight, Agent Mustache fights the Mad, many people lose many limbs, the special effects department opens another can of Chef Boyardee, then we get the Lamest Shock Ending of All Time, and roll credits.Of course, I'm leaving out the drunk college girls killed by a weasel-rabies-infected madman (which occurs before the weasel itself is mutated - huh?), the gripping rocket-to-Venus sequence, the two guys who dissect a severed weasel-limb in their kitchen, with tragic results, the unknown woman on a table in the not-lab, the bike-riding kids, and who knows what else, but none of those scenes really amount to anything, anyway.If that's not enough to put you off your feed, check out the imaginative, yet ultimately pathetic, use of props. Hypodermic needles are stored in beer steins, pasta tongs (or maybe a hair clip?) serve as the Venus probe's robot arm, and my favorite - the duct-tape covered shoebox with "DANGER RADIOACTIVE MATERIALS" (or some such - I'm not going back to search the disc now) crudely magic-markered on the lid. Really gives you that high-tech NASA feel.On the plus side . . . Hmmm. OK, there's a crashing-rocket's-eye-view shot that's kinda interesting, but only because it's hard to figure how they did it at their bottom-feeder level of production. The thick Long Island and Jersey accents of some of the actors are occasionally diverting. And, we get not one, but three Ron Jeremy look-a-likes in the cast! OK, one's kinda more Gabe Kaplan, but still, it should count for something.