Two sisters in the Vice Academy try to thwart the crime wave wrought by escaped convict Malathion, who got her name after being exposed to toxic chemicals. An honest new recruit does such a good job at arresting Malathion's gang that the sisters are taken off active duty. To get their jobs back, they try to tarnish the new girl's reputation. Vice Academy Part 3 is the sequel to the awful 1989 Vice Academy and the even worse Vice Academy Part 2 from 1990 and stars a bunch of hot girls in their underwears doing absolutely nothing (especially not acting) in a movie that could only be described as 'doomsday' since people will probably die while watching this or the previous 2. (0/10)

Stuck-up snob Holly Wells (a lively performance by the cuddly Ginger Lynn Allen) and ditsy sweetheart Candy (an endearingly daffy Elizabeth Kaitan) can't stand each other, but are forced to work together in order to stop a gang of escaped female convicts lead by the wicked Melanie (outrageously overplayed with eye-rolling hammy brio by Julia Parton). Things get worse when Melanie mutates into the crazed green-haired monster Malathion. Once again writer/director Rick Sloane gets plenty of cheap campy chuckles from such naturally knee-slapping subjects as lesbians in prison, mistaken identity, and excessive misuse and overuse of hairspray. The game cast really go to town on their broad roles: Allen and Kaitan make for a winningly sexy duo, Jay Richardson is a total riot as the arrogant, yet blundering commissioner, Johanna Grika does a respectable job filling in for Jayne Hamil as the stuffy Miss Thelma Louise Devonshire (the sequence with Miss Devonshire getting drunk, loud and unruly in a bar is absolutely hilarious), and the adorable Darcy DeMoss contributes an appealing turn as nice and honest reformed criminal Samantha. Robert Hayes' basic, no-frills cinematography is strictly okay. Both Alan DerMarderosian's bubbly, spirited score and the cool-thrashin' theme song hit the groovy spot. As an added bonus, the delectable Toni Alessandrini struts her scorching hot stuff as a stripper while Kaitan and Parton both bare their beautifully bountiful breasts. The zippy pace, lovably wacky characters, and frothy, cheerfully inane tone all ensure that this merry romp is a complete goofy hoot from start to finish.

There is no way to put into words just how bad, how shapeless, paceless and laughless these "Vice Academy" films really are. You have to experience one for yourself. For the third time in a row, writer-director Rick Sloane does not show even an ounce of writing or directing talent. There is nothing here that a person above the age of 5 will believe or laugh at, yet the (very brief) nudity and other "plot" elements make the films unsuitable for kids. Which leads me to believe that they are really aimed at adults with the mental capabilities of 5-year-olds. Elizabeth Kaitan makes a more than welcome replacement for Linnea Quigley - she is winningly bubbly and cute, and her wonderful big smile is about the only thing that can make a viewer smile as well. But watching her and the other girls in this film is like watching a bunch of flowers in a desert covered with horse manure. (*)

Holly and her sister face off against a hair-spraying robber in the second sequel in this worthless franchise (more worthless then the Leprechaun, Police Academy & Children of the corn franchises combined) Only the fact that all the girls who get topless have VERY ample chests keeps this from getting a deserved grade of F.My Grade: D-DVD Extras: :Director's commentary;Interviews ;filmographies for Jay Richardson and Julia Parton; and theatrical Trailer (which features nudity)Eye Candy: Toni Alessandrini as a stripper, Elizabeth Kaitan as Candy, and Julia Parton as Melanie each unleash their own respective huge hooters