Universal Soldiers
Universal Soldiers
| 07 August 2007 (USA)
Universal Soldiers Trailers

Set on an island in an undisclosed location, a top secret U.S. government program to create genetically modified super soldiers goes awry when the unstable test subjects escape from their holding cells and wreak havoc.

Reviews
movieman_kev

For those that think that the Asylum only puts out crappy Z-rated excruciatingly bad horror films, like such stinkers as "Halloween Night", "Massacre at Cutter's Cove", and "Snakes on a Train", you'd be dead wrong as they also put out crappy Z-rated excruciatingly bad sci-fi films like this one. Despite the title, this has absolutely NO relation to the Universal Soldier films, and owes much much to Predator and terminator (not to tarnish either of those two classics by comparison trust me). Anyways in this putrid little number, a group of the most highly ineffectual members of the military since "Hills have Eyes 2" are stalked by the lamest looking Borg-wanna be cyborgs that I've ever seen. Most of the film the enemy is off-screen, substituted by lame-ass predator-vision so it relies on the characters whom are all cliché boring cardboard cutouts that you truly don't care if they live or die. The ending in particular is so laughably atrocious that one can't help but feel their brain liquefying just by viewing it.My Grade: F

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piedra7020

You know, I wonder what this movie would have been like had I been able to hear what was going on half the time. Really, it sounded awful, absolutely awful. I couldn't hear half the dialog and even if I could it was overpowered by heavy nature sounds (including one particularly annoying seagull) and bad/inappropriate music.That said, I thought the film looked pretty good. I was impressed by some genuinely cinematic moments. Take away about 80% of the jv "predator vision" and don't artificially speed up shots (especially during fight sequences) and this film could have looked great. I like the "Saving Private Ryan" bland colors and choppy images but dial the latter back especially during the exposition sequences; it's too much at the wrong times.There was also some promising talent in front of the camera. Rick Malabri was quite photogenic though his character felt a bit one-sided and Kristen Quintrall was quite entertaining to watch though perhaps an errant boob falling free from her loose-fitting uniform whilst hanging from the rope snare would have enhanced the viewing experience. I would watch her work again...All in all I think of this film more in terms of what it could have been rather than what it was. It was butchered by bad sound and what I'm sure must have been too much rush and poor creative decisions by some producer. I could feel the art trying to break through but being stifled by time and business constraints. If nothing else, I hope all involved learned from the experience. If the talent of a select few is ever fully realized, than we might come to expect better, even great, things from an otherwise dismal and confusing film-making model.

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shaidar-2

... 1 out of 10 is way to much for this film.Where to begin, of where to begin! The acting is the worst I've ever seen, I remember my friends and myself acting better when we played "war" when we were like 5 years old. The image is really really bad. Special effects can hardly be called effects at all. But the most horrifying must be the sound. When the actors are outdoors, every 16 seconds you hear the same bird - ALL throughout the film! If they are inside, it's the same "mainframe" sound over and over again.Seriously, if you ever get the chance to watch this movie, you should. This is by far the worst movie I ever saw, and that is an experience like no other.ps: maybe I missed some, but I think the F*** word is said about a gazillion times in this film!

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Andrew Ma

Where can I start about how bad this is? Between the bad acting, pathetic special effects, bad sound (was everyone sharing a microphone or maybe the mike was only on the camera?) etc..., it was downright painful to watch this movie. I would watch Elizabeth Berkeley in Showgirl before this turkey. There is one girl in here with ample cleavage that tries to 'sex' up the movie, but too bad her looks are barely average...The actors have never had any experience with firearms and I find that amusing considering it's a "soldier" movie. They wave their firearms around (and at each other) and keep guns pointed up and backwards etc..Hammy acting, and cheesy lines galore. The special effects obviously are hamstrung by a non-existent budget. I echo the review of someone else saying you'd be better off watching grass grow or paint dry. I get to rent movies for pretty much free and I wouldn't finish this one if someone paid me $20...

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