Tooth and Nail is one of those ever-growing number of 'apocalypse' films, depicting a bleak futuristic world filled with... well, nothing much really - broken down buildings and empty roads.In this case, as the narrator explains to us in the opening monologue, it wasn't a comet or nuclear war that wiped out humanity, it was a lack of petrol (or 'gas' as it's set in America). Um, okay, it's best to just take that at face value for the purposes of watching the film. In fact, it's probably best to get your mind in the frame of watching most of it in that way (if you want to have any hope of enjoying it).We meet a small band of survivors who have taken refuge in a large inner-city hospital and who spend their days desperately searching for food. However, they come a cropper when they bump into a ruthless band of cannibals, hell bent on having them all for breakfast, lunch and dinner. And there you have it, it's a 'stand off' movie - think Assault on Precinct 13, but without the huge cult following.Now, I normally hate movies (typically horror movies) where the heroes due stupid things, like run back into the haunted house instead of calling the police. I should warn you that there are plenty of these moments in Tooth and Nail. Yet, for some reason, I couldn't find it in me to hate this film. I've turned off many a movie for stupid characters, but I sat through this in its entirety.Granted it's no classic. If you check out the other reviews you'll find more than your fair share of hate directed towards it. However, if you lower your expectations significantly (hey, it has Vinnie Jones in, so what are you expecting - Shakespeare?!) you might find it entertaining for an hour and a half of bloodthirsty horror where vicious cannibals prey on some of the stupidest human survivors ever to be left alive.

you can past that the general conceit of the whole film, America turning into a barren wasteland simply because they used up all the oil, is a straw dog impossibility and if you push aside that character's this stupid and ineffective could survive when nearly 2/3rd of the population have passed on, then this certainly had the capacity to be a fun little flick. Now capacity and actuality are two vastly different animals. It doesn't help that the three best actors in the film, Robert Carradine, Micheal Madsen, and Vinnie Jones, are vastly underused. Nor does it bode well that the twists are inane. I didn't completely detest the film and had fun with it up to a point. And while it's among the top of the "8 films to die for", that's more of an indictment on how crappy most of those films were than anything else. This still ranks FAR below "Borderland" My Grade: C-

Imagine that you are one of a small community living in a huge abandoned hospital after the fall of civilisation.Do you a) fortify a section of the building to protect against attackers and methodically search for useful supplies, weapons and food? or b) elect a useless leader (who is happy to spend his day banging his woman), leave all the hospital entrances open, and not worry too much about food and weapons, since you have plenty of tasteless army rations and at least two guns and a handful of bullets in case of an emergency?If you answered 'a', then you fully deserve the 'Max Rockatansky Award for Successful Post-Apocalyptic Survival; if your answer was 'b', then pray that civilisation never crumbles: you're clearly not built for life in a world thrown into utter chaos.Now imagine you're a member of group of survivors that have been driven to cannibalism due to a lack of food. You and your pals have several people trapped inside a large building; they are outnumbered, poorly armed, unorganised, and ripe for the picking.Do you a) storm in there, take them all alive (to keep the meat fresh), and cart them off to your lair? OR b) devise an elaborate plan to get one of your people to infiltrate the group, then wait until nightfall, when the building is plunged into total darkness, and take just one victim, leaving the rest for another night-time visit at a later date?If you answered 'a', then congratulations—you have the makings of a successful (and well-fed) cannibal; if you answered 'b' then you're as stupid as the bad-guys in Tooth and Nail, and fully deserve to have your own ass handed to you on a plate.Full of annoying characters incapable of making a decent decision, Tooth and Nail is a dreary piece of dreck that struggles desperately for a sense of realism, but only manages to bore in the process. Whereas recent post-apocalyptic effort Doomsday revelled in its sheer cheesiness but suffered somewhat due to a lack of a thoughtful plot, Tooth and Nail proves to be the 'anti-Doomsday' of the genre, taking itself far too seriously and severely lacking any sense of fun.Writer/director Mark Young's script is extremely weak, with it's 'undercover cannibal' plot device being neither particularly convincing nor totally unexpected, and there is plenty of banal dialogue to bog down proceedings even further. The direction is also rather uninspired, and with much of the action taking place in the dark, the film is a real strain on the eyes (and one's patience); it also makes seeing what might've been some half-decent scenes of gore almost impossible to make out.I rate Tooth and Nail a disappointing 3.5 out of 10. Normally, I would round this up to 4 for IMDb, but thanks to a ridiculous final shot of a cannibalistic Vinnie Jones gurning maniacally through a window, it gets rounded down to a 3!

A small community of young adults(..and a mute kid with roller skates)whose leader is a professor(Robert Carradine), living within the confines of a massive hospital in a major city after civilization has fallen apart due to the total absence of gas-fuel, fall prey to an ominous group of barbaric cannibals who collect a victim a night for their feast, led by the sound of a horn. This all starts when three from the group find a fallen young woman, Neon(Rachel Miner, of the previous year's "8 films to die for" feature, PENNY DREADFUL)who claims that the cannibals are called Rovers and slaughtered her whole family. Soon, the group fall one by one to these madmen, as their leader is the first to die, leaving them to fend for themselves with little hope of survival. Through this horrifying ordeal, one must strengthen the others as a leader or else they all perish.Actually, for a good portion of the film, it's quite intense and suspenseful because there seems like such little hope for these kids, without a head once he's removed(..the kind of leader who was quite smart with goal of starting over, competent in his abilities, whose weakness was trust which leaves him vulnerable)against such amoral brutes with a nasty visage and even nastier weaponry..they resemble extras from the second Mad Max film, THE ROAD WARRIOR. Vinnie Jones is a memorable heavy, with his evil smile, bulging eyes & whistling scythe as he spins it around ready for blood shed. Michael Madsen, who at first appears to be the leader of this group, has a minor role as the cannibal "Jackal" who whistles towards his quarry before using a two-sided ax to do his damage. Rider Strong(..who also appears in 2007's "8 films to die for" entry BORDERLAND)has a strong role as the aggressive Ford, the kind of character who thinks mostly of saving his own skin. He voices his opinion loudly often antagonizing instead of helping to solve their terrible situation. Michael Kelly(..as Viper, who leaves the group, tired of being bossed around by Carradine's professor. and is an awfully good shot with a crossbow), who many might know from the DAWN OF THE DEAD remake as the irritating mall security guard whose attitude towards the survivors was quite unkind, has a heroic role towards the end as the kind of tough character who everyone else quietly respected, despite his rather negative reactions to what the community was trying to accomplish. I'm not sure why Carradine(..who most identify from REVENGE OF THE NERDS)isn't used in horror more. I think he's a welcome presence, and I sure hated seeing him exit this so early. The one thing this film direly needed was an adult presence. The film has some ferocious attacks on the kids, which are slickly handled using the darkness of night(..and a camera which moves the right way to avoid seeing the initial stabs into flesh), to avoid real graphic displays of carnage. I think the best thing going for the film is the cold, dank darkness of the hospital setting, even creepier at night. The post-apocalyptic premise is touched on here and there(..mostly through dialogue)but the overall theme comes straight from HILLS HAVE EYES.But, I found the whole "wolf in sheep's clothing" twist absolutely ridiculous, and once we find out who is guiding this cannibal group, I couldn't take the film seriously anymore. And, Nicole DuPort's character Dakota, a soft-spoken, rather weak member of the group who was sleeping with the professor, putting her complete faith and life in his future plans, metamorphosing into a bloodthirsty savage with warrior paint, nearly had me laughing my ass off. And, to be honest, this whole method of executing the victims one at a time, using this specific time at night to hunt, had my eyes rolling. If you want to eat people, just f'n do it.