I'm a zen master, and there is various practises we employ in order to clear the mind of the everyday babble that all humans endure. One is to ask yourself "What is the sound of one ninja crapping?" and "If a ninja teleports in a forrest and no one is there to see it, does anyone give a crap?" Joseph Lai, Tomas Tang and Godfrey Ho were the undoubted masters at bringing this zen train of though to life, and here is a fine example.When I say fine, you know what I mean. It's a mid-eighties ninja film (but NOT a cut and paste film), and it's pure, unfiltered, garbage. Therefore it's great! Set initially in New York (Hong Kong with the Stars and Stripes sellotaped to various walls!), we find ourselves meeting two cops, the Chinese John and the Af-Am Spencer, being chewed out by their boss for arresting the senator's son for attempted rape – turns out the chief would have been happier if they'd let him just get on with it. This has nothing to do with anything but the fight is pretty funny.The plot itself involves John being framed for possessing drugs, escaping jail, and then trying to find out why anyone framed him in the first place. Obviously it's something to do with the drug trade but what you need to know is that there's five 'elemental ninjas' who have amazing powers (water, earth, air, fire, kebabs) that are rendered unamazing by the zero budget of the film. Watching a ninja surfing on a thin piece of bamboo or burrowing underneath sand is soothing to the soul.So John's got to go up against these dudes while having flashbacks to his own ninja training, which includes a direct rip from the start of Enter the ninja. There's a few twists and turns but no one in their right mind would care about them. These films are all about the brain damaged action and the laughs! And speaking of brain damaging, there's this brilliant bit of editing where John slumps his head over just right when the film cuts to a scene where a door is kicked open, making it look like John smashed his head on a table.Even better is the overlong sex scene (that John manages to have while the cops are looking for him) not only does this go on forever and THEN reveal that John hadn't yet taken his trousers off, but then the sexy music switches to some bizarre off kilter tune while the actress starts vibrating her arse all over the place. Genius.There are many, many battles in this one, there's stolen musical cues (like Psycho), and the usual bad dubbing. No one makes films as stupid as this anymore.

John (Lou) and Spencer (Thomas), who may or may not be part of some sort of Blues Explosion, are Kung Fu cops on the beat in "New York". There's a mysterious bad guy on the loose named Mr. Tong (Chang) and he commands an army of ninjas known as the Five Element Ninjas. Their history goes back "1000 years!" with each ninja mastering the forces of metal, fire, wood, earth and water. Now we know where those plagiarists at Captain Planet got the idea. When drugs are planted in John's home by a spectacularly evil police captain, John not only has to fight to clear his good name - he has to take on the Five Element Ninjas as well! Will he be able to do it? Find out today! Having been fans of Alexander Lou since we saw Mafia vs. Ninja (1985), we were happy to see him again (even though MFN came out after The Super Ninja) - especially teamed once more with his co-star Eugene Thomas. The Super Ninja doesn't disappoint with its Ninja Boom-era insanity and has all the hallmarks fans have come to expect: crazy dubbing (especially for Thomas, it sounds like a White guy doing a racist "Black guy" impression...with hilarious results), gravity and physics-defying ninja action in the forest, and fast and furious Martial Arts, which often get lost in the general aura of silliness.Because the movie is about Lou going on a revenge mission in a series of events started by the unknown (?) vendetta of his commander, which perhaps is not enough on its own to fill 90 minutes, director Kuo-Ren Wu simply extends scenes to the breaking point: while we usually enjoy the time-honored workout montage, the problem is that the Prerequisite Torture and the quasi-pornographic sex scene with Lou and his girlfriend Nancy (Lung) just go on for an interminably long time. That being said, some of the classic items we know and love are here too: the yelling while shooting a machine gun, the sax on the soundtrack, and ninjas that travel quickly underground like Bugs Bunny, and much more. So the crazy quotient, while not quite as high as in Godfrey Ho-land, is still pretty darn high and makes the movie overall pretty entertaining.One of the best sections of the movie came when it took time out from the plight of Alexander Lou and it introduced the strengths of the Five Element Ninjas in a series of quick profiles. Also it should be noted that ninjas can walk directly up a tree like they're walking up stairs, and Alexander Lou's sleeveless half-shirt that says "MAN" on it. As if his manliness was ever in question.In all, The Super Ninja just reinforces why the Ninja Boom of the 80's was such a beloved and successful time for ninjas the world over.

The Super Ninja is a great ninjafest which is very similar to The Mafia Vs Ninja, but The Super Ninja is much better. First of all, it has much more ninjas, and colourful ones. Second, Its plot is much more interesting. Third, it's cheesier than The Mafia Vs Ninja. Fourth, The fights are much better and the climax is very exciting! The story is about John, an Asian cop who works in America with his black partner called Spenser. One day, John was caught by his fellow cops for possessing drugs that had been put in his apartment in order to set him up. However, John doesn't give up! Therefore, He has to fight against his fellow cops, drugs dealers and the five element ninjas! I would like to add to this review some technical details such as dubbing, fights, nudity and cheese. Let's start with the dubbing, shall we? Well, its dubbing is very amusing, it's hardly synchronized and the characters have voices that hardly suit them. The fights are very entertaining and sometimes even stunning, the ninjas have great techniques, however, John fights more elegantly. About the nudity, well, there is one or two softcore scenes which add the film another aspect which manages to entertain as well. The cheese! I can certainly say that The Super Ninja has some of the cheesiest killings that I have ever seen, I am not sure if those killing have been filmed intentionally cheesy or not, one thing for sure, there is a fair share of cheese on the top of this pizza!!! Bottom line, I recommend that every fan of ninja movies check this cheesy ninjafest because it sure has made me have some good laughs! 9/10

In the same category as "The Ninja Protector" and "Mafia vs. Ninja" this non-stop action movie is a real treat. That is if you like this kind of movies: lots of bad dubbing, unbelievable flying action, terrible acting and funny ninja violence. Most of the cast from "Mafia vs. Ninja" rejoins in this hilarious movie that is a true MUST for any movie maniac!