The Official Rare Exports Inc. Safety Instructions 2005
The Official Rare Exports Inc. Safety Instructions 2005
| 22 September 2005 (USA)
The Official Rare Exports Inc. Safety Instructions 2005 Trailers

Not meant for the public eye, this film reveals the dark reality of what's wrong with company's product. With its primitive instincts triggered by bad behaviour of people around it, the seemingly tame Father Christmas will forget the intensive training and turn into a brutal beast. You better watch out, you better not cry, There's no room for mistakes.

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Reviews
Horst in Translation ([email protected])

And by this I am not talking about the quality of this 9-minute short movie. More of the contents. However, not everyone can be a winner and this description also applies to the short film. I don't think it's nearly as good as the first short film from 2 years earlier, maybe because the surprise effect is gone. 5 years after this second short, writer and director Jalmari Helander turned the idea into a full feature film. Back to this short film here, Helander basically tried to bring back all the factors that made the first one so funny (actors, style, narration), but still it comes short. Nonetheless, I think people who really loved the first can give this one a go too, or skip it and go for the long movie directly. Everybody else can give this one a pass.

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WakenPayne

Apparently With All The New Father Christmases Around People Need To Be Taught How To Behave Around One, This Is Fantastic At Being One Of The Dumbest Movies Anyone Is Likely To See, Its Nice To See A Country Outside The United States & Britan That Makes Dumb Movies.The Funniest Rule Is "Don't Drink Or Curse", I Had To Pause The Film To Actually Laugh Because I Had A Fear That I Wouldn't See The Rest Especially The Narrator Saying " If You Do This In Front Of A Father Christmas Death Is Certain." (I Suppose I Will Never See Santa The Same Way Again.) This Is Actually My Favourite Short Film This Is Along Side 9, Punisher First Round, Rare Exports 1, Human(Off Halo Legends), Detective Story (Off Animatrix) & Max Payne: Hero (To Name What I Call "The Best").Overall I Highly Recommend This."You Better Not Shout, You Better Not Cry, You Better Not Pound I'm Telling You Why, Santa Claus Is Coming To Town."

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Michael_Elliott

Official Rare Exports Inc. Safety Instructions 2005, The (2005)*** (out of 4)Fun sequel to RARE EXPORTS, INC. has seven Father Christmas' being shipped across the world only to eventually kill humans. This safety video was put out by the company so that people will learn what they can do when Father Christmas is present. The things to avoid doing include smoking, drinking and being rude. If you want to survive an encounter with Father Christmas then it's important to have some gingerbread cookies on hand. Director Helander's sequel to his now cult film is certainly a worthy followup and an all-around smart film in terms of the way it goes for the comedy. Whereas the first movie played out like an instructional video or some documentary you'd see about hunting, this one plays out like those incredibly silly safety videos everyone has been forced to watch at some point in their lives. I really loved the way the film showed silly stuff being done including a very funny sequence where you must try and play dead to avoid an attack. The silly nature of the film is perfectly brought to life with the dead-serious narration that once again really packs a wonderful punch and makes the film come to life. The entire ten-minutes are full of wonderful gags and the technical quality is extremely high.

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Aleksi (marspatukka)

This is actually a sequel to the short film Rare Exports Inc., witch tells you the story of hunting and producing decent Santa Clauses of a wild Northern beast. I had seen the first part few years ago, and I just recently got to see these "Safety Instructions" and I must advice you to get your hands on both of these short movies, they are simply hilarious.---------SPOILERS--------- The name tells pretty much everything there is to know about this film, the safety instructions to Father Christmas. Film starts with a scene with hunters familiar from the first movie, shipping a Father Christmas-box to his new happy owner. But something went wrong and the crate never reached it's destination, so seven hours later when our hunters reach the harbour where the accident has taken place, they find few brutally mutilated sailors.After examination of the place, scene changes to a warehouse where our hunters demonstrate all types of behavior that affects Father Christmas in a negative way. These are for example of course cursing and drinking, smoking, making loud noises, etc.This follows with the capture/execution-scene of the escaped Santa, and then in the end we have also a short graveyard-scene which explains where do Father Christmases go when they die.Most of the scenes are pretty graphic, and I must add that this is no film for the smallest of the family.But nevertheless, great laughs and I know I can watch this again and again. And all this in 10 minutes! 10/10

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