Big Alligator River, The (1979) * (out of 4) Another Jaws rip-off from Italy has a rich man building a resort in the jungles of Southern Asia only to have the locals call in a huge alligator to eat everyone. This is from director Sergio Martino who is best known for his giallo and cannibal films but this thing here is quite bad and easily the worst of any Jaws rips I've seen. The film is incredibly slow moving and the first hour is nothing but talk, talk, talk. The alligator attacks go into high gear at the end but by then it's way too late. The cinematography and music score are the only saving grace.

Not to be confused with Lewis Teague's "Alligator" (1980) which actually IS an excellent film, this "Il Fiume Del Grande Caimano" laboriously ends the exotic trilogy Sergio Martino made around the end of the seventies (including the rather watchable "L'Isola degli uomini pesce" and the not so good "La Montagna del dio cannibale"). Tracing outrageously the plot of "Jaws", the script fails at creating any suspense what so ever. The creature is ludicrous and its victims are simply despicable. Stelvio Cipriani's lame tune poorly illustrates the adventures of these silly tourists presented from the very beginning as the obvious items of the reptile's meal. No thrill out of this, rather laughters actually! And we could find this pitiful flick quite funny if the dialogs and the appearance of the natives were not so obviously inspired by pure racism. Very soon the giggling stops in favor of a sour feeling witnessing such a patronizing attitude. We could excuse badly made films and poor FXs, but not that kind of mentality. Never!

I really do fail to see the actual surplus value of this movie. It's not bad enough to be hilarious. There's no sleaze or gratuitous nudity (although there was plenty of opportunity). There's no gore. There's no suspense in the first hour of the movie 'cause there's way to much scenes of tourist having a party and natives playing funky tribal music. That last part was actually funny on many occasions: You see these natives hitting congas and 'jembés' and that's indeed what you hear (badly synchronized) on the soundtrack. But they also added this funky bass-line on the soundtrack. So, where was the bass-player? At one point the natives get angry and start killing the tourists. Why all of the sudden? It's supposed to be because the evil white men build this tourist complex, which according to their myth awakened the wrath of the river-alligator-god (I actually missed the explanation for that one). But the natives did help for several months to build the tourist complex, so why the sudden angriness? And how in the hell did they manage to push the helicopter in the water??? It's all silly and pointless. This movie also features the skinniest Afro-American model I've ever seen.At one point our heroic leading couple visits this cave where a weird, crazy old man lives. The only point to that scene is that they make the "shocking" discovery that the killer-crocodile is actually an alligator. Crocodile or alligator, what's the difference? It's big, it's made out of plastic and it eats people. All the same to me. The alligator is a rather silly creation. It's very stiff & motionless and doesn't even flap its feet when it swims. The eyes don't even move when they're shot in close-up. I guess they didn't know 'animatronics' back then in Italy during 1979. There's also a lot of pointless inter-cut shots of the local wildlife. I suspect it's stock footage.Like, I said, the first hour was pretty lame and the only reason I didn't switch off the movie was because my cat was asleep on my lap and I didn't want to wake the sweet thing. But the last half hour of the movie did get better. We finally get to see some action when the alligator swims through a horde of panicking people snapping its teeth and munching on them. The most entertaining (and at the same time funny) scene is when Alice and Daniel drive a van over a bridge and it collapses. We're looking at a matchbox-version of the van falling in the river here. Funny. But nicely shot. In fact there are several other nice traveling camera-moves. Surprisingly for this type of flick. I was gonna point out some stupid details concerning the end of the movie, but I don't wanna spoil it completely, in case you do decide to watch this movie. My advice is to stay away from it. If you wanna see a decent alligator movie, then see Lewis Teague's ALLIGATOR. I admit, that one isn't Italian and isn't a JAWS rip-off, but it certainly is more fun. And if you're interested in other movies made by director Sergio Martino, then I strongly recommend the highly entertaining 2019: AFTER THE FALL OF NEW YORK. That one's an over-the-top rip-off of every possible existing post-apocalyptic-future-of-doom-movie. "Italians" and "rip-offs", two words that go together very well.

A photographer and model are flown to a new resort hotel in the middle of the jungle to shoot some publicity photos. The hotel is owned by a ruthless developer who appears to have little regard for the environment or the people surrounding his paradise. He has hired many members of a local tribe to work for him in his hotel. But what the developer hasn't counted on is that the land Paradise House sits on is sacred to the tribe. It's the home of their giant alligator god, Kroona. After the model goes missing, the photographer finds it difficult to convince anyone that something is wrong. Has the model become another sacrifice to Kroona? The Big Alligator River is a mish-mash of ideas from a lot of other movies. The most obvious influence comes from Jaws. Martino admits on the DVD that Jaws was the inspiration behind this movie. The scenes of kicking legs in the water being stalked by a POV shot or of a large unseen creature attacking a boat or of the alligator's inevitable demise are almost direct rip-offs of Jaws. Among the other influences I noticed was King Kong. A woman being tied sacrificially to a wooden raft is very reminiscent of Fay Wray's plight.As for the alligator, it hardly comes across as realistic. Instead, it looks almost like a stiff rubber child's toy. Victims must remain virtually immobile if the alligator is to get his mouth around their bodies. In recent reviews I've read of Jaws, I've noticed more and more complaints about how "fake" the shark looks. I would advise anyone who feels this way to steer clear of Kroona from The Big Alligator River.Beyond the bad special effects, The Big Alligator River features a less than stellar storyline (it drags in many places), generally poor acting (there are exceptions of course), and just plain silly dialogue. But given these weaknesses I can't bring myself to rate this movie any lower. I had too much fun with it and will eventually watch it again. Despite the flaws, I found it to be good cheesy fun. It might not be everyone's cup of tea, but it's mine.On the positive side, The Big Alligator River has one of the best, most enjoyable set-pieces I've seen in a while. The scene where many of the hotel guests are trapped in the water between the alligator on one side and a group of natives throwing flaming spears at anyone attempting to escape on the other side is remarkably effective. Pick your poison – being chomped by an alligator or being shish-kabobed by the natives. It's the definite highlight of the movie for me.