Howsabout this for dumb plot: a group of sexy female killers-for-hire (code-names Black Widow, Cobra and Scorpion) bump off several scientists, and are then given the task of getting hold of four computer chips that, when combined, can control a satellite with the power to pinpoint the exact locations of all of the world's weapons; it's a mission that might prove impossible to complete were the chips sensibly locked away in a high security vault, but instead each is hidden inside a medallion and worn out-and-about by government agents, making life a whole lot easier for the big-breasted assassins.With such a laughable set-up and very little in the way of decent (non-sex related) action, The Dallas Connection is easily one of the weaker films in my Sidaris 'Girls, Guns & G-Strings' box set, but even though the film's writer/director Drew Sidaris possesses even less talent than his father Andy when it comes to telling a decent story, he's a chip off the old block when it comes to hot women, The Dallas Connection featuring some of the most physically impressive ladies of the whole series.Leggy Julie Strain is back once again, as head assassin Black Widow, wearing her usual assortment of bondage themed outfits and skirts that fail to reach as far as her stocking tops; assisting her is blonde Julie K. Smith (as Cobra), owner of the film's most impressive chest, and scorching brunette Wendy Hamilton (as Scorpion) who really knows how to work the wet suit and thigh-high PVC boots look. Working for the good-guys, we get silicone-chested Sam Phillips as Samantha Maxx, one of the agents tasked with wearing a medallion. All the ladies get nekkid at some point or other to get it one with the film's assorted hunks, making this one just about worth a watch despite the dreadful story, diabolical acting and dull direction.

This flic will be remembered as a classic for the some of the funniest dead-pan dialogue and gratuitous shots of T&A to fill one of the most absurd plots since "Gymkata". From the asteroid showers, to the extended shower scenes, to the blow-up doll decoy, to the awkward reactions to the horse race which obviously isn't taking place, this movie never stops entertaining.It stays perfectly on the line between over-the-top farce while appearing to try to be a "real" film, in true Ed Wood fashion. It's amusing to read the comments of disappointed viewers who attempted to derive substance from this B-movie. This is one to watch late night on cable, preferably with some good friends and a keg.

The usual action flesh fantasy for male viewers, this Sidaris flick is not as good as a few others, but the girls looks great (there is my favorite Playmate, Wendy Hamilton, that doesn't show as much as I hope, but it's still a threat; there is also Julie Strain's Black Widow, with an opening scene Basic Instinct style that it's really good) and the action is good enough to let the 90 minutes of the movie pass without any boring moment. The plot is contrived, but it's part of the show: for a Sidaris movie it's a good enough one

If you've seen one Sidaris flick (even those directed by his son), I think you've seen 'em all. Bullets, babes, explosions. All in a day's work and the Dallas Connection is no different. The story is downright dumb, the production values are on the low side and the budgetary restrains keep the action scenes short and terminally unexciting. The only real value (like most Sidaris flicks) are the women on display. Supplied here by Playmate Wendy Hamilton and former Penthouse Pets Julie Strain, Samantha Phillips and Julie K. Smith (one woman who seriously makes me drool). Her cowgirl grind in the club and the hot tub scene easily take top honors.Take away the sad attempt at action and this is a glorified T&A flick for the guys. You know this, I know this. So final verdict, unless you're willing to withstand a hokey movie the likes of only the Sidaris name can make in pursuit of seeing some pretty ladies (or your a fan of Julie K. Smith), you're best to stay away. Don't say I didn't warn you otherwise.