this is the kind of movie that i try to remember with a fondness even in excess to how i really feel about it, just to make up for the fact that i often fail to make any real converts to my strange passion for movies that work better than they should. That Old Feeling is a good example (others I could cite: My Fellow Americans, Odd Couple II) of just how hard it is to really convey the intimacy that certain long-term rancor breeds...Denise Farina (who first entered my hall of fame in Get Shorty, because he nailed it, the way he abuses Gene Hackman, the huge oft-broken nose...brilliant). And Bette needn't reprove herself to me, and though I'm hardly a die-hard fan, there's something so vibrant about Bette Middler as she negotiates her raging trysts with her loathed ex...That friction, the movie suggests, is central to any sort of authentic passion. And, like any closet-romantic, I am dazzled by the knowledge that Paula Marshall (Molly, the newlywed) ended up getting married to her costar Danny Nucci (plays a paparazzi following around Molly's mom--Bette Midler) a few years after shooting on the film wrapped. chemistry is crucial.

***SPOILERS, OK?!?! SHEESH, GET OVER IT!*** I have extremely high expectations for movies. Unbelievably high expectations - unreasonably high.This picture meets - and even exceeds - expectations. Predictable? Yeah, but so what? You know that Molly's parents are going to end up together in the end. And you know Molly isn't going to end up staying married to the congressman. Who cares? That's not the point of the movie.The point of the movie, is Molly, her heart and soul. She's so tightly wound, she's about a quarter of an inch away from blowing a gasket. For anyone who's grown up trying to keep their head straight while their parents were off being crazy, you'll identify with her instantly. She's so self-loathing, trying to run her world and feeling like she's failed any time any little thing goes wrong, that she can't even see that her husband doesn't love her. Now, it's not that she's self-absorbed. In fact, quite the opposite. She's totally and completely giving of herself. Too much so; this is what comes about from a lifetime of having to keep other people's sh*t together. But she's simply not in tune with herself and her feelings, because of all the noise from all emotional sh*t going on inside her.Slowly but surely, bit by bit, she loosens up. And it's not the kind of loosening up where somebody just tells you, "hey, relax, don't be so stressed out, everything's cool!", and the hero realizes, "hey, all I have to do is relax, and not be so stressed out, and everything will be cool - that's terrific!". I hate those kinds of movies, they're insulting. That's not how sh*t changes.It's the kind of loosening up that happens slowly, subtly, without her (or the viewer) even noticing it. A slight shift here, a small turn there, a little diversion inside herself. Bit by bit, she goes from having a hurricane inside her head to feeling some bright, clear sunshine for a change. It happens without her even realizing it. You won't realize it either. That's why people can't figure out why they like this movie. It just kind of sneaks up on you, then BAM! So relax, set your intellect on cruise control, and allow yourself to be fulfilled by a charming, wonderful film.

This is a lovely romp without a wasted moment. The often quite broad comedy is believable due to the great script and fine acting. The story cuts to the chase in a way that is refreshing (see the scene where Lilly and Dan go outside at the wedding). The leads are all appealing, especially Danny Nucci and Paula Marshall as an unlikely duo and Bette Midler and Dennis Farina, who are evidently having a fabulous time.This is just flat out enjoyable and well-written, the way a lot of comedies were in the golden days of Hollywood. And like those great classic comedies, this is not a sappy sentimental story with any false nobility. People admit to not being perfect. They don't try to be anything they're not - or if they do they are quickly deflated.The underlying theme is "be true to yourself and don't get sucked into the boring b.s. of life." This is the kind of subversive edge that the great screwballs had, right down to including a pompous wannabe politician and a gold-digging second wife.Bravo. If only they'd make more like this. How about a sequel or the same team coming back together for another project?

As larger-than-life as she is, Bette Midler manages to allow her co-stars to share the spotlight a little in this naughty comedy. David Rasche and Gail O'Grady could each carry a film on their own, and Farina's role fits him like a glove. Rasche was my favorite character. Jennifer Aniston was offered Paula Marshall's role as the daughter, but they wouldn't pony up $1 million for her. Marshall is fine, but Aniston may have been worth it to draw more people into the theatre and make this film the bigger hit it deserved to be. Her stuffed shirt of a husband exudes a sexy stuffed-shirtedness. But Nucci is annoying and his supposedly comic scenes with Marshall fall flat. He's supposed to be likabke, he's not. With Carl Reiner directing, it would hard to not find this film funny, and unpredictable. This film is not for people with conservative morals, but everyone else should enjoy it.