Stonados
Stonados
| 31 August 2013 (USA)
Stonados Trailers

A storm chaser tries to save Boston from destruction when a freak tornado bombards the city with huge boulders.

Reviews
Clay Loomis

The SyFy folks are nothing if not predictable. All you have to do is look at the director's credits to see what you're in for here. And as to the writer of this nonsense, Rafael Jordan, he has absolutely no shame. He's got a couple dozen of these horrid movies to his credit. I presume someone is paying him to do it, but I can't imagine why.Tornadoes tossing boulders. OK. Well, I guess they had to make something, and this is actually no more insipid than Ragin' Cajun Redneck Gators or Chupacabra vs. the Alamo. Do we call this a job well done? If you were aiming to make a stupid movie, then absolutely yes.Kudos to all involved here. This movie is a mess and the makers just have to live with that.

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Leofwine_draca

After the surprise success of Asylum's SHARKNADO, the current trend for these B-movie disaster/monster combos seems to be tornadoes mixed with something else. STONADOS has to be one of the silliest of these ideas, as it's a film where tornadoes are mixed with stones due to some ancient prophecy or some such. It's all nonsense anyway, because tons of people are killed when tornadoes lift debris off the ground and chuck it at them, so why bother with this whole stone angle?Needless to say that this SyFy Channel production is pretty much devoid of any kind of originality or sense. It stars B-movie stalwart Sebastian Spence (CRASH SITE: A FAMILY IN DANGER) as a journalist who makes it his job to chase storms; inevitably he teams up with the usual group of officials/scientists/investigators to try to track down the menace before too many people are killed. William B. Davis (BEHEMOTH) also shows up as an old timer with a budgie in one of the film's many random sub-plots.STONADOS is a mish-mash of disaster staples, all of them played out enthusiastically, if without much in the way of skill or discernible talent on the part of those involved. The CGI effects aren't quite bottom of the barrel stuff here, but they're still a far cry from those in THE AVENGERS, for instance. STONADOS is very much par for the course for this sub-genre.

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Davideo_C

In Case you missed it on Syfy channel there's another kind of Storm front coming to DVD. No it's not the sequel to Sharknado It's just a stone's throw away from that. It's "STONADOS" . As the title suggests this time it's weird frozen boulders that are being hurled through the air to wreak havoc. Did I mention that these stone's were created in the atmosphere by volcanic dust and that when they land the sudden atmospheric pressure drop causes them to explode.Maybe it's because I'm from New York but much like the Denver Broncos I have to say it was a treat to see a New England city getting pummeled and destroyed for once. That's right when a sudden storm forms in the waters off the coast of South Boston, it not only sucks up a tour guide but Plymouth Rock itself! From then on this movie lands with some dark humor and some smashingly funny (I know, I went there but it fits) kills.As Maddy Randall (Miranda Frigon) is investigating the landing of Plymouth rock she calls her brother, science teacher and former storm chaser Joe Randall (Paul Johansson) There they meet up with Joe's old storm chasing partner. Now a cocky, self aggrandizing weatherman Lee Carlton ( Sebastian Spence) Who tells Joe of the weather phenomenon which he later copyrights as "Stonados". Of course mayhem ensues as not even Joe Randall's daughter and son believe flying stones are going to hit them and explode again. But Joe and Lee along with their old friend and lighthouse keeper Ben (plaed by William B. Davis, remember "Cancer Man" from the X Files?) are tracking the freak storms as they move into Boston Harbor and up the river Charles, of course Joe's son and daughter decide to go to a college football game. So it's up to the reunited storm chasers Joe, Lee and Joe's sister Officer Maddy to not only save his kids and then stop the deadly storms with an untested theory before the stonados grow in force and turn inland.Is this a great movie? Will it "Rock" (sorry did it again) the awards shows? Probably not, I mean flying, man eating sharks are a tough act to follow, BUT if like me you have a soft spot for films like "Sharktopus" and "Sharknado" you'll enjoy this disaster flick. It made me grateful to be hunkered down inside with just snow and polar vortex's outside. Therefore I give it three flying boulders out of five. This storm-front is predicted to hit the DVD shelves on January 28th so duck, cover and enjoy!

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Michael_Elliott

Stonados (2013) ** 1/2 (out of 4) Silly but entertaining film from SyFy has Massacusettes coming under attack from tornadoes but these aren't your typical ones. No, these tornadoes have sucked up Plymouth Rock and now they are shooting large stones all over the state but even worse is that these stones blow up after a few seconds causing more damage. STONADOS is being called a rip-off of SHARKNADO but it should be noted that this film was made first and was set to air in April but due to the Boston Marathon bombing the station held its release. With that said, the film for the most part is pretty fun as director Jason Bourque manages to do a nice job at keeping the viewer entertained. I think it's always important not to let the action stop in a picture like this and the director doesn't let that happen and in fact it goes by pretty fast. The entire film has a very good pacing, which is a major plus and it also doesn't hurt that the entire thing isn't taken overly serious. The film offers up some better-than-you'd-expect performances from Paul Johansson, Thea Gill, Sebastian Spence, Jessica McLoud and William B. Davis. Another plus is that the special effects are slightly better-than-average but please don't go in expecting Oscar-winning work. The effects are all obviously fake but they're certainly much better than you normally see on SyFy. The one strange thing is that the gore level is at zero and I really don't recall there being a single drop of blood. I'm not saying this here is a bad thing but it's quite rare for one of these movies. Fans of the disaster genre should find enough here to keep them entertained just as long as they don't take it too serious or expect too much.

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