This film is one of the greatest illusions I have ever witnessed - It managed to make my interest disappear right before my very eyes. Astounding! The acting made my hair stand on end (without any wires) and at one point I must have been hypnotised, because to this day I still haven't been able to recall anything redeeming about this film. There was some discreet mind-misdirecting going on during the act, I mean film, because my mind didn't just begin to wander, it took a bus halfway through the film and didn't turn up until the next morning. Conjuring Oliver Reed up in this film was a pretty clever gimmick as well. The penultimate showpiece was a "sleight of hand" trick: where I gave 36p of my money (via Amazon) for this DVD and never saw the cash again - simply amazing! All these of were mere parlour tricks though, compared to the final, and best trick of all... the one where I sawed the disc in half!

When his son Michael, who is an undercover CIA operative, is kidnapped and imprisoned by the Angolan army, his father Col. Bill Smith (Borgnine) snaps into action and assembles a team of inter-racial mercenaries to travel deep into Africa to free his son. This team includes, but is not limited to: Smith himself, Blade (Vosloo), Toshiro (Kwong), Sam (Mulford), Chuck (Kennedy) and Rick (Greene). All have their specialties in the fighting arts. On the side of the baddies we have Col. Schneider (Vaughn), supposedly an East German with some interests in the Angolan army vs. the rebels, and Capt. Simpson (Reed), yet another character who has his own interests. Add to this mix Elia (Lom) and you have a desert/jungle adventure best suited to Saturday afternoon viewing.Clearly, the only real reason to see this movie is its incredible cast. Our hometown hero Ernest Borgnine leads the pack with his engaging and always-upbeat performance. It really is a pleasure to see him shooting machine guns along with all the younger cast. We also always love to see Oliver Reed doing what he does best - yelling crazily - whether he technically has to be there or not. He plays a very similar character here as he does in Rage to Kill (1987). Robert Vaughn brings his distinct voice to the proceedings, and a fairly early performance by Arnold Vosloo completes the picture. Interestingly enough, he met and married co-star Nancy Mulford when they met on this film. See, Skeleton Coast really brings people together.While the many stars on show will draw viewers in, and there is plenty of beautiful scenery and such, the movie is kind of flat and feels like filler at times. It also has some wacky musical stings that seem inappropriate. Really, this is just a star-studded Exploding Hut movie, and it's also a bit overlong (probably to try to accommodate all the characters).On the technical front, if you watch this on Netflix streaming, the colors are soft and faded. On the Nelson VHS, that is not the case. The movie looks a lot more normal, with sharper colors. If you opt to buy this movie, look for the Nelson VHS.While the wonderfully jolly Ernest Borgnine is a personal hero, Skeleton Coast really is nothing overly good OR overly bad. It's kind of somewhere in the middle. If you're a fan of any of the stars involved, and you're okay with that, do proceed. If not, your time might be better spent elsewhere. If Skeleton Coast was The Expendables (2010) of its day, then Ernest Borgnine truly is the original Stallone.For more action insanity, please visit: comeuppancereviews.com

One has to wonder why all these Hollywood actors signed up in 1987 to do a movie that was a co-production with South Africa. Even when you put that fact aside, what you still have here is a very strange production. For one thing, can anyone figure out why Oliver Reed's character is in this movie? He makes a couple of appearances, then bam! he's gone and never is seen again. Herbert Lom's character could also easily be written out as well. Anyway, the movie overall is kind of talky and a little dull. Though there are some nice African locations, some decent action sequences, and Ernest Borgnine once again gives an entertaining performance. You get a little more out of him in this role because it gives you a rare chance to hear him swear (something Borgnine doesn't like to do in a movie), and you get to see him really ham it up when he disguises himself as a Cuban colonel (!) A movie to watch while you're reading a book.

Despite the fact that the main premise of the film is a rip off of the 1983 movie "Uncommon Valor" (starring Ernie's 'Poseidon' sparring partner Gene Hackman), this film lacks it's portentous nature and concentrates on non stop action,some great battle scenes (despite what was obviously a limited budget) and a group of veteran actors, knowing full well that this isn't exactly "Shakespere In Love", having fun with their roles: most notably Ernest Borgnine, who gives it everything he's got. In fact, the ones who will enjoy this movie the most will be fans of the '60s TV sitcom "McHale's Navy" -- or 'mercenary army' in this case. Substituting for Joe Flynn (Capt.Binghampton) is Robert Vaughn playing a German colonel, forever frustrated by the rumors of the approaching army's invasion of the prison fortress and the political prisoners contained within: his constant berating of his assistant Schroeder reminds one of Bob Hastings' Lt.Carpenter in similar circumstances. Also the mercenaries themselves --(Leon Issac Kennedy plays 'Chuck'....at times one expects Tim Conway to stumble out of a doorway, followed by the inevitable explosion) a religious expert knife thrower, an elder statesman soldier, an explosives expert, a beautiful blonde who can handle herself in a fight and a ninja named Toshiro (no -- no sign of 'Fuji') Led by the Colonel, with the help of a local rebel army, they invade the fortress to rescue the Colonel's CIA operative son -- and pick up anything else that catches their fancy. A great performance by Ernest Borgnine as the Colonel, in typical 'McHale' wiseguy fashion; his scene of him disguised as a Cuban sergeant and his ordering around of Vaughan's men and later when confronted by an army of angry soldiers is hilarious, reminding one of his 'Cousin Guisippe' twin role on 'McHale'. His scenes with the Angolan rebel leader played by Simon Sabella are beautifully performed and are unlike scenes normally found in action pictures. Also on hand is Herbert Lom as a slightly shifty informer and Oliver Reed as the head of the country's diamond security (The scene when he launches a rocket attack on Borgnine and co. -"Fire! Fire! Kill the bastards!"- is a highlight -- obviously he was looking forward to heading off to the pub when this shot was completed!) All in all, a pleasant feel good action picture -- and most heartily recommended for all "McHale's Navy" and Ernest Borgnine fans.