Secret agent Bryan Cooper (aka Super Dragon) is called out of retirement to investigate mass hysteria in Fremont, Michigan where college students are committing murder and mayhem en masse. He figures out that it's got something to do with chewing gum being handed out in a local bowling alley and he traces the source to Europe where, with the help of a gangster (a dead ringer for Andy Devine) sprung from Sing Sing to give him a hand, he contacts "our man in Amsterdam", Charity Farrell (luscious Marisa Mell), and together they discover an Ernst Blofeld-type megalomaniac hellbent on, what else, world domination... Robotic Ray Danton, with his black patent leather hair and flinty onyx orbs that make him look positively reptilian, was at his best playing slimy bastards and the role of a smarmy, quick-thinking government agent doesn't suit him. He does his own stunts (as threadbare as they are) with all the agility of a mechanical bear and since he's an unlikely babe magnet, Ray's feminine conquests are as absurd as the plot. Amsterdam locations and a bit of tacky flair here and there can't elevate this James Bond rip-off any higher than sub-par but Marisa Mell, here "by special arrangement" according to the opening credits, ups the pulchritude ante as does sexy British starlet Margaret Lee (looking a bit like Diana Dors) as Cooper's Miss Moneypenny-ish "old reliable". Unless you're as fond of the dramatis personae as I am, find something better to do with your time but, that said, there's an MST3K version out there and I'll bet it's a blast.

Although it is executed with a certain degree of professionalism, and has some interesting touches here and there (like a bulletproof vest that reflects the bullet and sends it back to the sender!), "New York Calling Superdragon" is defeated by its sheer dullness. Not much happens throughout the film: there are no major set-pieces and little excitement. Nearly all of the action is limited to fistfights, unless you count the explosion of an obvious miniature building at the end. Ray Danton is an agreeable cut-rate Bond (and although others here have found him unlikable, I thought he was more respectful to the ladies than the real Bond); Margaret Lee and Marisa Mell are both sexy, but largely used for decorative purposes only; the villains are as forgettable as the rest of the film. (*1/2)

Super Dragon? What kinda spy name is that? This is one of the better spy movie send-ups, especially because it takes itself completely seriously. The Dragon is remarkably smooth and smug, and his lumpy, cheerful sidekick Babyface is along to help solve the mysteries of dead colleagues, toxic gum and villains who can't stop decorating. Our Hero is worldly ("Fremont, Michigan? That's a little college town, isn't it?") but accident-prone -- he'll stay away from Ludenkelder after this assignment. This movie is colorless as spy movies go, except for the wild colorings in the ladies' hair. ("Betcha that color comes out of a bottle," one character grumps.) Worth getting the MST3K-ized version of this film, especially for musical interlude provided by Joel and the 'bots. Unlike such efforts as Code Name: Diamond Head, this movie actually has some decent locations, including a panorama of foggy windmills that looks like a "starving artists" painting.Be sure to check out Mario Cuomo (well, it sure looks like him) as the art collector with a collection of pen-phones and unlisted numbers. Take my word for it!

This is the kind of movie, like Diabolik, that the French would find funny, but everyone else in the world would think is incredibly DUMB. Man, there sure were a lot of James Bond clones in the late 1960's, and finding them is really a crap shoot. On this one, chances are you'll not like it. A joint project among four countries (and a nice rule of thumb is the more countries involved, the worse the film.) by Monaco, France, West Germany and Italy, the film features none of those countries, but was filmed in the Netherlands. (I can't say I blame these countries for not wanting their country in the film.) Secret Agent Super Dragon himself reminds me of one of those perfect jocks who always got his way in school and nobody would even think of being against. I ended up hating him, and the film. Perhaps if he was more imperfect and human, we could root for him.