Rock 'n' Roll Nightmare
Rock 'n' Roll Nightmare
| 10 July 1987 (USA)
Rock 'n' Roll Nightmare Trailers

At an old farmhouse, a family mysteriously dissapears at the hands of evil. Years later, hair metal band The Tritons comes to the farmhouse, whose barn now features a 24-track recording studio. Lead singer John Triton gets the band to perform their first night in the farmhouse after dinner, and weird little beasties suddenly appear, and strange things start to happen. Band members (and their tag along girlfriends) begin to act strangely and vanish one by one. Soon, only John Triton remains, and he holds a secret. Finally, the evil shows itself and a battle between heaven and hell ensues....

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Reviews
Vomitron_G

Screw those possible spoilers. You need to read this, if only for the fact that this film is still out there, unrestrained and does not come with a warning.It is virtually unfathomable that this film was conceived by regular folks out to make a normal low budget (horror) movie. Nobody in their right minds would come up with an idea like this - or a "concept" if you will - and then attempt to actually turn it into a movie. And only an insane aspiring "producer" (or one that has lost his wits a long time ago) would decide to invest money in something like this. Coca Cola Company, at the time, did see some benefit in it, though. Understandably, since the script contained a scene where a little demon-critter gets his hand flattened by a can of Coca Cola. That's pretty much the same like saying that Coca Cola is good for you. It's a force, or a tool, of pure goodness which you can use to fight off evil. This ridiculous theory even makes perfect sense in the light of this film, as basically - if you can actually say this film is about something - it is simply about Good versus Evil and nothing more. This should also tell you exactly how ridiculously senile this miserable piece of celluloid turd is. Because you tell me now, does that sound like a concept you or I could have come up with? Like I said, this epic failure was not made by normal people. "Rock 'n' Roll Nightmare" (aka "The Edge Of Hell") really is a shock to any young/struggling filmmaker's system to see how a steaming pile of cesspool-droppings like this ever received enough money to have cranes & dollies come with the "crew" that made this film. Actually, this is not a film; it's an un-film. A thing that never should have been.It was conceived, writing & probably influenced on many levels by one person. A guy named John Mikl Thor. He also (tries to) act(s) in it. Why? Why would he want to do that? Make some sort of un-film like this and then be the "star" in it? He can't act, he can't write, he can't sing, he can't... wait, it'll probably be much easier and quicker to list the things he actually can do... Nothing.So, okay, clearly Mr. Thor is a musician. Not a very good one, I suspect. Nor does he understand anything about 'the art of making music' and show this on film. When a guitar solo comes on in a song, you can see him playing this on a bass. Playing the air guitar would have been cooler, Mr. Thor. A shame nobody bothered to tell you that. Or perhaps they did, and you just wouldn't listen, right? Also, he's clearly the 'very wrong' type of musician. As becomes evident by the way he just plays his plain self in this flick. If it's so obvious that you've never written down a single musical note on a piece of paper, Mr. Thor, then don't sit your ass down in this movie and pretend that you can while trying to get your 'perfect love song' right. Mr. Thor might eat the cake, but his band members don't munch on sloppy seconds either. Extremely bad third-rate hair-band/poser hard rock music is what we are presented here. There's quite a bunch of sequences where the whole band can be seen rehearsing songs in their barn. But it's not a rehearsal of course. It's just the band performing (i.e. play-backing) like they would 'live', acting all stupid as if they are performing on some imaginary stage. In this case, it looks like they are trying to make it resemble a 7th-rate music video (shot in a barn, for about 3 complete & truly horrible songs). Even a blind guy can see that Mr. Thor just wanted to shamelessly promote his atrocious music and that a very bad horror themed un-film with no plot would be the best way to reach the kids. I suspect the music-vids-shot-in-a-barn segments where intended & created to have them easily removed from the film & turn them into an "official" music video that would hopefully get them some airplay on national TV. That's a pretty lousy scheme there, Mr. Thor.What's this movie about, actually? Well,... nothing. Absolutely nothing. A house. A barn. A bad hard rock band. Horribly dated fashion trends. Abominable music. Ugly people. Sex, nudity, sex. Talking about doing drugs but never actually taking some. Demonic possession. Demon critters. People disappearing, maybe one guy died but I can't recall seeing it. Tits & ass, both male & female. Groupies. Groupies having sex. Groupies vanishing. Groupies re-appearing. An empty house, eventually. A family with a kid from the past. A family with a kid from the past for which we get no explanation. Amazing latex & prosthetics SFX. Superb halloween masks. And an utterly baffling climactic end-battle/boss-fight... here it comes: The devil (a life-sized demon puppet on strings & sticks) appears. Mr. Thor tears off his shirt. Now he looks like a total barbaric moron and then he proclaims he's an arc angel. He proceeds to battle the devil-demon. Another song comes on and they just hold hands & dance in circles until the song ends. Devil-dude goes up in smoke after that. Then there's a final shot of some empty street with houses in some suburban area which I absolutely didn't get, and this un-film ends.This "movie" is impossible to grasp. A product extracted from a deluded mind. But who cares? It's not like anybody died or animals were harmed while making this movie. The film, in whichever format you might find it, does need a warning sticker to come with it, in my opinion. Something like... Caution: This movie can be hazardous to your health. Viewing this without alcohol may cause brain damage.

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BA_Harrison

After what seems like an eternity watching a white van travelling down a series of roads, Rock 'n' Roll Nightmare begins proper at a secluded farm-house where crap 80s hard-rock outfit Triton, led by musclebound singer John Triton (Jon Mikl Thor, who is like David Lee Roth on steroids, but minus the charisma), plan to record their latest album.As the guys (and their big-haired women, who have also come along for the ride) are busy rocking 'n' rolling, evil forces rise up from the bowels of Hell to cause all manner of mayhem; the demons, however, are unaware that front-man John is an undercover archangel out to destroy them all...Heavy rock and horror have always been natural bedfellows, but never has the union been so plain bizarre as in Rock 'n' Roll Nightmare, a nonsensical slice of 80s cheeze, written and produced by it's star Jon Mikl Thor (who proves to be as lousy at scriptwriting as he is at songwriting). Making not a lick of sense from start to finish, this film serves primarily as a glorified music video (we are treated to several bad rock tunes in their entirety), secondly as a spot of soft-core porn (between the music, the band members get it on with their girls), and finally as an actual movie.Unsurprisingly, the acting is dire, the special effects are laughable (the demonic creatures are badly made hand puppets and manky marionettes), and the direction is uninspired (Evil Dead style camera-work yet again), all of which qualifies the film as essential viewing for experienced fans of trash cinema. And if that wasn't enough, there's also Thor's embarrassing heavy rock fashion sense (his wardrobe includes a particularly nasty silver jacket with tails), a band member who speaks with the worst Aussie accent ever (so bad, I thought it was Cockney!), a one-eyed monster chicken in the farmhouse fridge, and an attack by deadly flying starfish (!), all of which should be more than enough to convince you that life ain't complete until you've witnessed this unbelievable crap-fest for yourself.

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movieman_kev

There are movies that exist out there that are so awful, so bad, that they're good "Filthy McNasty", "Class of Nuke em High" the first Troll film, and on and on. This putrid little horror cheapie that is Rock N Roll Nightmare is definitely NOT on of those. This Jon Mikl Thor starring piece of crap is so bad that I revs past bad, soars past 'so bad, it's good' and takes a firm nosedive into 'so bad that it's freaking terrible' territory. No redeeming value whatsoever. My 2 year old niece can do better than this celluloid waste. I kept hearing about how the last 10 minutes made sitting through the rest of the film worthwhile. Well no and no. Thor tells a foam latex devil puppet that he had tricked him, gets pelted with clay starfish, and that's pretty much it. Yeah that was so worth sitting through boring minutes of nothing but a car driving down the road, so worth watching people wash dishes, and endless scenes of filler and padding. I love heavy metal, i love low-budget horror flicks, so one would think i'd love a combination of the two...right?? WRONG. Do yourself a favor, bub, go rent "Trick or Treat", "Rocktober Blood" or pretty much any metal/horror hybrid and leave this one in the dust bin where it belongs. Followed by a sequel!!!! That I hear is even worse (is that even possible) DVD Extras: Commentary by Director John Fasano and actor Jon-Mike Thor (the latter also provides a video intro & afterwards); 15 minute interview with Thor; 13 minute behind the scenes make-up featurette; 21 minutes of rare footage from the set; and two music videos Eye Candy: Both Jillian Peri and Teresa Simpson get topless My Grade: F

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burbs82

Why a 9 you ask? Because my 1-10 scale is different, and my dreams not like yours. B-movies are on a different scale system, and this one is very special, mainly because of the ending and the totally radical Jon-Mikl Thor soundtrack. But the ending... I won't spoil it, but it will shock even the most hardened b-movie connoisseur. You WILL be left asking yourself questions like:Jon-Mikl Thor; Genius or Madman?Jon-Mikl Thor; Was that a skinny woman's nightie you were sporting during the (GNARLY) song 'Energy'?Jon-Mikl Thor; Is my new-found fear of showers only a TEMPORARY side-effect from watching the movie?Jon-Mikl Thor; Based on the lyrics to your (RADICAL) song 'Energy', do you think it's accurate to say you SOMETIMES act like a fool? And did you say 'I feel small when on shrooms'? 'Cause sometimes when I'm on shrooms my head feels small, then really big, then small again...Jon-Mikl Thor; Is that hairspray manufactured on our plane of existence or just in the heavens? That super-hold hairspray could only be created by the Gods themselves! By the beard of Zeus!The answer to all of these questions and more is YES! Even the ones that weren't yes or no questions. Jon-Mikl Thor is the freakin' INTERCESSOR! You'll take whatever answer he has to give and you'll freakin' like it or he'll cast you out of Valhalla and laugh at you! That's Jon-Mikl Thor! High on his mountain! Weird, stupid fun.

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