So, I started watching Parasitic online. The *only* reason I was going to give it a try is because it was filmed at The Castle in Ybor. Nope. I couldn't even get to the 10 minute mark. Horrible. It has been promoted as "cheesy, campy fun"... Wrong. I love cheesy, campy fun. I live for cheesy campy fun in horror movies. This is just bad. It is like the maker of this movie stood on 7th Ave. in Ybor and randomly asked fake-tittied bimbos if they wanted to be in a movie. No acting experience necessary. The best these "actors" can hope for in a career is amateur porn... very amateur. I am surprised (and slightly embarrassed) that The Castle agreed to do this. I agree with the others who have posted that Tim Martin should stick to FX. Directing is obviously not his forte. I want my 10 minutes back.

It's not often that I feel physical pain while watching a film but "Parastic" managed to accomplish just that. This is by far one of the worst casts I have ever seen on film. I was left shaking my head and randomly yelling at my TV. I'm convinced that my dog can deliver lines better than this group of so called actors. I have to say that the "Paris Hilton" wannabe was by far the worst of the bunch and hopefully we won't be punished by seeing her in future roles. The sound was horrific, the acting was dreadful and the fact that we are supposed to believe a group of people could be stuck in a building the entire night being chased and knocked off one by one because their boss is the only person that carries the 1 key ever made for this place is beyond insane. I found myself rooting for the monster and looking forward to the next death. If I were Timothy R. Martin I would consider removing the huge "WRITTEN AND DIRECTED BY TIMOTHY R. MARTIN" portion that is inserted before the credits in an effort to get as far away from this piece of work as possible.

Usually I can find something good to say about any movie, but unfortunately not this one. The writing is awful. The dialog is ridiculous and utterly unbelievable. To top it off there is something weird and tinny about the audio, only the spoken parts though, the obnoxious music comes across loud and clear. It actually sounds like a porno movie where they dub the sound in post production. Every one of the characters is unlikable so there is no one to root for. The visual quality is bad too. The whole film (except the opening shot and one end shot) is set in a bar with the lights turned out. It is too dark to see much of what is going on. The action is too slowly paced to keep your interest. It seems as if the movie spends hours sitting around the bar in the dark bitching about being stuck in the bar, then hours searching for the missing people. It becomes tedious especially since the characters are so disgusting to be around. This movie is too bad to be entertaining and not even remotely funny. It's a complete waste of time.

I truly want my money back. This guy thinks he can direct because he's been on the FX crew of a bunch of movies. If the rating system had a zero, he'd be getting that. The acting was awful and the sound man was inebriated or deaf. I bet this would have been a decent B-movie if it had acting talent, directing talent, and a sound man with the ability to hear. But alas, it sucked in all departments. Tim Martin, please go back to FX and leave direction to the pros. It seemed like the actors read from a prompter and just their line for the scene before cutting, there was no chemistry between them at all. The FX was the only thing that was half way decent and it left a lot to be desired, but it at least would get a B rating.