There were two scenes in the film that were funny. The first came when the *&#%^ just killed some chick by flying into her mouth. A group of the girls(remember, they're all porn stars) found her in that state ran to another cabin to tell everyone that they found a ($%#% in her mouth, and there was NO reaction. Definitely funny.The problem with this film is that there were a million jokes they could have used like the one above, but the film just isn't very funny at all. It was really difficult to get through.I was prepared for the low-budget production values, and I don't shy away from movies or dislike them for that characteristic alone, but this film just didn't capitalize on it's brilliant premise. While watching the film I was thinking of all the of ways it could have been better...unfortunately, this film is not funny enough to score any higher than this. 2, maybe 3 funny moments just doesn't fill 90 minutes. Bring in the Evil Dead bunch, re-cast Ron in his role here, maybe even add Adam Green as a director, and boost the comedy and horror aspects of this movie while still keeping it silly, and you'd have a real winner. Not funny enough to gain the cult status that the storyline led me to believe I might find.Great idea... heck, fantastic idea... poor script considering the endless possibilities. I'm no filmmaker or comedian, but even I could have made this infinitely funnier.You want a better film with a similar premise - try "Teeth" or "Chillerama(wadzilla segment)".

There are no words that can describe the boringness that is this film. When I saw the trailer, I expected a slapstick horror-movie that makes fun of both the cliché's in porn and horror-genres. Instead, this movie gets boring very quickly and for the most part is just people talking nonsense to each other with weird 'jokes' that never seem to go anywhere. I expected a little bit more entertainment from a movie about a penis that goes around killing people.The gore is also pretty nonexistent which was a letdown for me. I thought that a movie like this would at least go all the way with the killings, but this movie is actually pretty tame except for perhaps the shots of people wrestling with a rubber dildo. Some of the conversations are okay and can be pretty funny if it wasn't delivered so utterly uninspired and boring. I know this is the third time I mentioned the word boring, but its really all you need to know about this movie. Its actually pretty amazing that the creators could make this movie boring with the plot that it has, but they did it.If you are looking for a good nonsense horror-movie to watch with your buddies like I was, then don't stop here. This movie is mostly sleep- inducing and forgettable crap that doesn't deliver what you expect from it. Three stars go out to the cast and crew that did a decent job of working with the little they were given.

I recorded ONE EYED MONSTER on a whim, as it featured Ron Jeremy in his first legitimate movie. It's an "R" version of an adult movie being filmed away from the city, the boyfriends, girlfriends, etc.Thank goodness Ron Jeremy's screen time is limited to about 20 minutes, before his character -- he plays himself -- is killed off. As bad as Ron Jeremy's acting is, the rest of the cast is even worse! The acting is wooden, unemotional; and, insincere. The dialog is laden with sexual innuendo, which is not subtle or clever at all.About 40 minutes in (after the first few deaths -- yawn) I fast-forwarded to the end, which features the lamest special effects since THE CREAPING TERROR of 1964. I know this is supposed to be funny; and, yes, some of the death scene's are reminiscent of SCARY MOVIE; but, that does little to save this film.The gag of a homicidal, detached penis gets old fast. And, while I could live with such an insane premise, the worst is the long, dragged-out, heavy dialog. There was just too little action, barely any violence (for an "R" rated horror flick, with "graphic violence" that means virtually none); and, little of anything else to hold your attention.

One just has to love a movie that has balls! Oh, wait a minute, I didn't mean it that way! A rather typical "monster attacks isolated group" movie becomes a lot more fun when the group is a bunch of porn film people and the monster is the penis of Ron Jeremy!And it just gets better. Ron Jeremy and Veronica Hart star in it and, before the unthinkable happens, they manage to slip some commentary on the adult business nowadays. Is it any different than the comments of disgruntled senior citizens in other horror movies? YES! Because they are porn stars. OK, maybe when I put it this way it sounds terribly cliché, but it somehow wasn't! All the reused scenes from other movies that I would disgustedly call clichés, in this one they become omages to classic horror films.Bottom line: it makes a perfect fun beer movie with a bunch of friends. Girls could not possibly understand this, except maybe for the Kegel references.