ONE-EYED MONSTER is a low rent comedy horror that makes use of real-life porn-film legend, Ron Jeremy. The plot is preposterous - an alien life force comes to each and possesses Jeremy's detached penis before going on a killing spree - but the execution is surprisingly likable given the paucity of imagination and the sheer dumbness of the premise.The story template is pretty much a rip-off of Carpenter's THE THING, with characters holed up in a snowbound cabin and finding themselves bumped off one by one by an unseen premise. The special effects aren't up to much, so they're wisely left off-screen for the most part, which I think was a good idea. The humour is quite funny in places and as a whole the film is funnier than I'd expected. It's also tamer than you might think and rarely distasteful.Oddly enough, the best acting comes from the two genuine porn stars in the film, Ron Jeremy and Veronica Hart. Jeremy in particular comes across as a lovable goof rather than anything else. B-movie fans will enjoy the presence of old-time cult star Charles Napier in a supporting role, although my favourite character is the geeky Ed Bryne-lookalike sound technician.

Okay, so while lying in bed trying to die of an awful, awful cold, I ran across this title on the movie guide and after convulsing into uncontrollable laughter, thought "Naw....it just COULDN'T be about THAT!!!.." Oh, but it is!!!!! I saw Ron Jeremy's name and thought "now that name sounds familiar..." Suffice it to say, it is indeed THAT Ron Jeremy, the alltime super porn star of the 70s/80s who was known far and wide for his one-eyed monster.This is a very clever take on that theme. A porn film crew goes to Northern California to shoot a movie and gets trapped by a blizzard, a "shooting star" (no pun intended) and of course the one-eyed monster that positively terrorizes the entire crew. Believe it or not, the production values are quite good, elevating this waaay above cheesy. Moreover, the ensemble cast is excellent while the writing is crisp, witty, and hilarious. Of course it was also sick and twisted but I laughed until I cried. The outstanding performances, hands down, are those of Veronica Hart, an aging porn star who eventually "saves the day," (you will NOT be well for how she does it!!!), and a positively hilarious turn by none other than Charles Napier.Hate to be so cryptic but if your tastes run the gamut from the absurd to the sublime (this most assuredly being sublime), this should DEFINITELY be part of your collection. It is quite funny and though it didn't cure my cold, it sure made me forget I had one!! January 6, 2013 - watched again for about the 8th time - eeeeeeeeeeexcellent way to bring in the New Year!!!! - movie just rocks!!!! :0)

Aliens and adult films. What could they possibly have in common?You know it's "adult" because Ron Jeremy and Veronica Hart are in it. They are off in the woods making an adult film when the strangest thing happens.Ron is invaded by the alien force which settles in his penis. It detaches itself, and is now terrorizing the group.Needless to say, it is a funny movie. In fact, it gets downright ridiculous.Jason Graham and Amber Benson were excellent.If you liked Teeth, you will enjoy this one.

"One Eyed Monster" is a fun and solid throwback to the monster films of the past.**SPOILERS**Traveling out to the mountains, Laura, (Amber Benson) Jonah, (Jason Graham) Jim, (Jeff Denton) T.J., (Caleb Mayo) Lance, (Bart Fletcher) Wanda, (Jenny Guy) Veronica, (Veronica Hart) Rock, (John Edward Lee) Angel, (Carmen Hart) and Ron, (Ron Jeremy) the cast and crew of an adult movie, take over an abandoned cabin to make the movie. Attempting to get started, they notice a bright light in the sky but think nothing of it and get back to the shoot. When they start to notice him acting weird, it soon becomes apparent that an alien life force has invaded his manhood and has taken to stalking them all in an effort to propagate it's species. Trapped in by a snowstorm, they try to find a way of stopping it's sexually-potent attacks before they're all killed off one-by-one.The Good News: This one here was actually really good and enjoyable. One of the main points in here is the fact that this one turns out to be completely enjoyable and entertaining when it gets going, featuring a large amount of attacks and confrontations with the killer instrument. The very first instance, which happens during the movie shoot to the completely unaware participants of the situation, and when it starts to turn wrong is when it gets fun due to the aftermath left, which is a cheat due to being spelled-out by dialog but the gist of it is still quite fun. When it's apparent what has happened, it gets even more impressive when it goes on the rampage and knocks off two more within the space of a few minutes all the while managing to keep it's anonymity in the process. That's what makes those so fun, and that the whole thing is played off as one big scene is where it really gets the most enjoyment from. Another really good encounter is a fun chase scene through the snow, where the victim on a snowmobile tries to outrun the thing burrowing through the snow, which is pretty exciting at times and concludes on a rather great kill. There's some other good attacks found in here as well, from the different encounters around the shack, including a great one inside the kitchen where they're trying to trap it with a special sexual device, to the creepy chase through the darkened underground corridors, and it has a lot of good parts that make for some great times. The finale is also rather fun, packed with a lot of good points, from a deliciously sleazy sheer through the action that occurs in the shack to the rather fun and exciting conclusion to it all. There's also a rather good scene, which doesn't have any action at all, where the film decides to have some fun and decides to re-write history featuring the alien's impact in a major event in history in a manner that comes off as plausible under the circumstances and actually has some rather interesting presentations because of it, and even though its just dialog all the way through, there's some enjoyment to be had from this scene. It's also really nice to know that the film manages to have a level of cheese attached to it, mostly through the premise and how it unfolds, which is rather nice and definitely gets some good points to it. The last plus to this, and is a byproduct of the cheese, is the comedy that runs throughout. The jokes and gags are really good, and the situation is just too good not to be made fun of. These here are the film's good moments.The Bad News: There wasn't much at all really wrong with this one. One of the few problems is the fact that there's a pretty large amount of kills here which either happen off-screen or are completely bloodless, which doesn't go over well with this type of film. This is the kind of film where it's expected to go completely full-on in it's blood and gore scenes, and to have instances where scenes like the first attack are shown at an angle so as to be completely unable to witness any of it except through the dialog explaining it, which takes a lot of the fun out of the scene, or other attacks where it does the same thing and completely keeps the kill off-screen. When it does show them, it's fun, but the fact that there's more where we don't get as much blood as we expect there to be is where this one fails. The only other flaw in here is the sleazy tone which runs rampant through the film. From the sexual innuendo while the porn shoot is going on to the constant references to his manhood and finally to the props showcasing it in action and the kill inside the bathroom, it can be something that turns off those that have no desire to see such things on-screen. These here are the film's flaws.The Final Verdict: Playing more like the fun and cheesy throwback monster films of the past, only dirtier, this one comes off as incredibly fun and enjoyable. Give it a shot if you're into these kinds of films or a fan of the creative side, while those that will be turned off by the flaws should heed caution.Rated R: Graphic Violence, Graphic Language, Nudity and several sex scenes of various strength