DRAGON AGAINST VAMPIRE is a typically inane martial arts/horror combo from Godfrey Ho, here writing under the pseudonym Benny Ho. The director is credited as one Lionel Leung, who only has this single credit to his name, which sounds suspiciously like another Ho pseudonym. Nothing would surprise me at this point. The film is yet another South Korean/Hong Kong co-production that may be the result of two films stitched together, as it's completely nonsensical.The story begins with three grave robbers larking about in a cemetery and getting spooked by lively corpses. One of them, a fat guy, finds a cute dog and eats it in a distasteful scene. Eventually they meet a martial arts master who looks a bit like Yuen Biao if you squint a lot, and they also encounter a vampire which is sadly Westernised rather than the hopping variety that I personally love seeing in Chinese cinema. What follows is a jumble of scenes that seem to be randomly thrown together. There are cheesy effects, a lot of night time stuff, bad humour, and a little action, mainly at the climax. It's very, very bad, and thoroughly confusing.

It took me a while to grasp this movie. There is a plot, more or less, but there are so many random things that... well... Who is the guy in the coffin? or the other coffin? He isn't the vampire, because he comes from a door. Why are they on the run? Why does the swastika fend of the undead? I honestly cannot fathom why there is a turtle and a log in the river to save Tony. This film must have lost a few scenes in the editing room, because it doesn't make sense Spoiler: Somewhere in the movie, we are introduced to another vampire. Well, Surprise! that vampire is the other vampire wearing a mask. But you can clearly see that the other vampire is a real person, and has silly putty on his nose. Also, the characters find a severed head. Upon first glimpse, A friend and I thought the corpse had been thrown through a mattress, but no, it is supposed to be a severed head. Don't blame us, you can see the poor b******d's body. See this movie. I bought it for a dollar, and it was the best dollar I have ever spent. You will laugh, you will cry, because this movie sucks a-hole and is my god, at the same time.

Okay, first of all, this movie confused me so utterly the first ten times i saw it that i had to just keep watching it until it made sense. I wondered (and still do) if the people who dubbed it for release in the US even owned a translation, or if they just made all the dialogue up on the fly. But honestly, DRAGON AGAINST VAMPIRE has EVERYTHING!!!!!!!!! It has a magic kung fu master who scampers around on his hands because he never leaves full lotus position. When we first meet him, he seems to be living underground. There are random flashbacks that are difficult to distinguish from dream sequences or all the other random parts of the movie. There is a fat man who pounds his belly a lot and cooks and eats a dog. Suddenly the waitress' pants fall down. And then they are haunted. Random bad things happen. There are bells and strings on the ground. What's going on? Why are their faces on the billboard? Why is that man trying to beat them up on the side of the road? Good god, is he escaping on top of a giant tortoise or is it a motor-propelled log? What is going on?????????Anyway, Do you get my drift here? Eventually i understood what it all meant and how it fit together (as you will too, with time and patience), but if you put your intellectual sensibilities aside for just a little while, this is one of the greatest, most nonsensical pieces of cheap cinema ever available for $3.99 at your local five-and-dime (i bought mine at Woolworth's before they went out of business and have never regretted it for a moment!!!!). I strongly recommend this movie to everyone with a good sense of humor, a loose grip on reality, and an alcoholic beverage (or else a peculiar friend who never stops laughing and can speak in funny voices).

The video box cover presents this flick as a hybrid of the martial arts and horror genres. Upon renting it, I figured that if it did not succeed as a horror flick (which was not likely anyway), that it would at least have some good martial arts sequences -- or vice versa. Well, it fails on all counts.Basically a series of lame, crude comedy sketches. Bad dubbing. A ripoff.