'70's British sex comedies, eh? You either love them or hate them. I have a soft spot for the 'Confessions' series ( mainly due to the presence of the scrumptious Sheila White ) and 'Adventures Of A Private Eye' is not bad either, but let's face it, many were absolutely appalling, saddled with witless scripts that did no favours to the often impressive casts they had. 'Eskimo Nell' is a rare exception. Michael Armstrong not only wrote but starred in this very funny movie as 'Dennis Morrison', a naive young man who aspires to be a film director. Turned down by every studio, he goes to work for seedy Benny U.Murdoch ( the wonderful Roy Kinnear ) of B.U.M. Productions, maker of such classic motion pictures such as 'Vampire Vomit' and 'The Sexorcist'.Benny wants Dennis to direct 'Eskimo Nell', based on the infamous Victorian dirty poem. To help him, Dennis recruits Clive Potter ( the late Terence Edmond ) and Harris Tweedle ( Christopher Timothy, three years before he became a household name sticking his arm up cows' bums in 'All Creatures Great & Small' ). They approach potential backers, all of whom have different ideas about what sort of film 'Eskimo Nell' should be. One wants a hardcore sex movie with his blowsy girlfriend Billie ( Beth Porter ) in the lead, another a kung fu musical, while yet another prefers a gay Western.Their headache increases when Benny runs off with the money. As they are legally responsible for the film, they have to make it or else face a lawsuit. In desperation, they approach Lady Longhorn ( Rosalind Knight ), founder of a puritanical religious group that wants wholesome family entertainment back on the big screen. Hence our heroes have to make four versions of 'Eskimo Nell' in order to please everybody.At the finale, the wrong cans of film are accidentally sent to a Royal charity screening, and Her Majesty The Queen gets to see the hardcore sex version...'Eskimo Nell' sends up '70's British sex comedies a treat. I'm sure the cast and crew had a lot of fun with it. Armstrong is not much of an actor admittedly, but the rest of the cast more than compensates. Roy Kinnear is a scream as the big breast-fixated 'Murdoch', a man who boasts that he once cleaned up at the box office with a film called 'Dirty Knickers'. Also on view is Diane Langton ( from the I.T.V. version of 'The Rag Trade' ) as busty porn star 'Gladys Armitage' ), Katy Manning ( who had recently been seen as 'Jo Grant' opposite Jon Pertwee's 'Dr.Who' in the B.B.C. series ) as Dennis' posh girlfriend, Christopher Biggins, Sheila Bernette as an actress who does not mind getting her kit off but who balks at the thought of doing any acting, Nicholas Young ( from the I.T.V. sci-fi show 'The Tomorrow People' ) as camp-as-a-row-of-tents 'Deadeye Dick', Anna Quayle as 'Reverend Mother', and a fleeting glimpse of '70's porn icon Mary Millington as a stripteasing traffic warden.The director, Martin Campbell, went on to make two well-received James Bond movies - 1995's 'Goldeneye' and 2006's 'Casino Royale'. Simon Park, who wrote the music, later penned the theme to 'Eastenders'! Some gags are old, such as the naked actor getting part of his anatomy trapped in a clapper-board, and who is then carried off on a stretcher, bandages wrapped round said part ( I remember Stanley Baxter doing something similar ). We are a long, long way from the kind of British film industry 'Eskimo Nell' set out to lampoon, of course. Times ( and public tastes ) have changed. But this is still an amusing film all the same. 'Eskimo Nell' won't leave you cold.

Nobody could claim that this is a great film, but it is amusing and it does portray well a certain moment in time in the British film industry. It is well enough made, indeed, this is the second feature from the man who would later direct the recent, Casino Royale and The Legend of Zorro and he certainly establishes something of a CV for himself with this. A keen group are out to make a film and a greasy executive/agent ably played by Roy Kinnear helps them raise the finance. Unfortunately everybody who can invest will invest only if the film is of the particular genre he wants and includes his latest girlfriend or even boyfriend in one instance. This means numerous versions have to be made and Cambpell certainly has fun here. For us though most of the fun is in the original setting up with interviews and casting. There is plenty of nudity but it is not in your face and as they say, essential in the script. One particular tableaux presumably for the porno version is well done and a cry from one of the more pretentious thespians is classic; 'But what is the motivation for my erection?' Stars the writer of this and director of Mark of the Devil, Michael Armstrong, who also worked with Pete Walker.

The writer of this film is Michael Armstrong. He was also director/writer of a previous Tigon film 'The Haunted House of Horror'. During the making of that film he experienced some very unpleasant run-ins with an individual representing AIP (the American distributors). This resulted in Michael's script being re-written and a very different film to his original concept being produced as the end product. This film 'Eskimo Nell' parodies those experiences. Listen to Michael's voice over in the 'extras' section of the DVD of 'Haunted House of Horror' for a graphic description of his experience and learn who some of the characters in 'Eskimo Nell' actually represent!

In the artistic wasteland of 1970s' British sex comedies (and arguably a good deal of British cinema at that time altogether) Eskimo Nell shines out as a modest beacon of wit, satirical in a way that still strikes a refreshing note. These days no doubt, Morrison and Tweedle would be assigned to work on several cheap UK gangster films at once, as that's the genre which has lately shown the greatest lack of nerve in the home grown industry. Back then, with UK's business in worse decline, it was such dire products as Come Play With Me (1977), that exemplified a depressing wave of home grown 'sex' films, neither sexy or arguably, real cinema at all: just the sad, exploitative effects of a restrictive lack of investment, and censorship. Together with the slightly more family orientated Confessions... series and the even softer saucy postcard world of the Carry On... series, this is what represented the officially sanctioned 'adult' industry at the time.Eskimo Nell's satire therefore had in its sights a ripe and obvious target, although it is still frequently overlooked as just another sex film of its time. Its a perception not helped by its small budget, mediocre (if enthusiastic) acting as well as a lingering air of titillation characteristic of the genre. Real life actor-screenwriter Michael Armstrong, whose previous film was the more predictable It Could Happen to You (aka: Intimate Teenage Secrets, 1975) - which would never the less make an interesting double bill with his Nell - made the hard to see crime factional drama Black Panther (1977) after this, before disappearing into TV and the humdrum. Greater things have come of the director Martin Campbell however, as he has since made such films as GoldenEye, Vertical Limit, as well as just being engaged on Casino Royale.The present film falls into three main parts. First there is the setting up of the project, a period of the narrative dominated by the avuncular, disreputable Murdoch - a professional performance by Roy Kinnear, the sort of role at which he shined. Once he disappears and matters move onto the complicated matter of the filming, then character comedy is swapped for situational, the change bringing probably the funniest moments of the film. Finally, there is the anticipated premiere, the chase after film canisters and so on, providing a suitable wrap up. As others have pointed out, this last section changes the emphasis of the satire somewhat, from one focusing purely on the sex film industry as such to mimicking the strategies of the caper film.Much of the pleasure of Nell comes from the incidentals, which have a real feeling of time and place, as well as a feeling that some of the principals had had first hand experience of the industry they spoof. As the guileless Morrison, Michael Armstrong makes an impression as a hopeful but little else; his pretentious cineaste-speak sounds hollow even as satire, especially when compared to the gloating, tit-centred obsessed speeches of Murdoch. Morrison's fazed expressions, to be replaced by that of creative concentration during the actual production, remind me of a similar innocent: that of Dennis Barlow, at the centre of Richardson's underrated The Loved One (1965). Both Barlow and Morrison share an initial bewilderment at encountering a strange society, and one tinged by aberrant sexuality. But while Morrison remains detached and never opportunistic (as well always slightly surprised at the brave new world in which he's suddenly found himself) Barlow is able, initially at least, to make headway of sorts. In fact one of the weaknesses of Nell is that its central trio contain no central dynamic, other than being desperate to salvage the situation in which they have been trapped. Even the penguin obsessed and virginal Tweedle, the most eccentric of the three, pales in significance compared to the outrageous characters surrounding him the sex film world.Nell follows in the tradition of the British sex comedy in never being erotic, merely naughty. It gains an edge for us today from being so self referential, with an intelligence missing from other productions of the time, and some have compared it to Truffaut's Day For Night (1973). In truth it is far less accomplished than that, bearing more of a resemblance to Confessions Of A Blue Movie Star (1978), being less about cinema itself than the practical bluntness required for the production of porn. And its best moments appear as part of that production: the gay cowboy ripping a succession of skin tight jeans as he gets off his horse; the kung fu religious school with the bizarre juxtaposition of Sound Of Music with Bruce Lee, or just Christopher Biggins' cherubic face as he raises up a suggestively wrapped umbrella into our line of sight - with equally suggestive dialogue, naturally. The British DVD is barer of extras than a starlet's soliliquy.