My friends must tire of hearing me say, "I watch the bad movies so you don't have to." I average about 600 movies a year (really)...and most of them are bad. DI wouldn't even make it into the bottom 100 movies I've seen, in spite of what some reviewers have stated. It is obviously self-mocking and completely tongue-in-cheek, intended as a bit of soft-core disposable fluff. There are absolutely no pretensions.As far as the FX, I've seen much worse in many recent independent (and major studio) releases. Plus, the editing is coherent (even if the continuity is deliberately uneven) and you can actually hear the dialogue.As far as the plot, it actually has one, even if it's as silly as a Carol Burnett sketch. (BTW, the "healing boobs" scene is pretty sly.) Anyway, there's a lot more pretentious junk than this to watch, so give it a try some evening when you've had a few drinks and you need something disposable.

As teenagers my friends and I went through a phase of deliberately renting the worst film we could find rather than the best. If it also had a bevvy of beautiful women in revealing costumes (or lack of them) it was definitely our first choice. After a while we began to notice that the name Fred Olen Ray appeared as the writer/director/producer on a disproportionate number of them and soon we began to actively look for him as a mark of, well, not quality so to speak but a guarantee of gorgeous babes in peril and nudity. So, how many boxes in that quotient did 'Dinosaur Island' check? Well let's see; Beautiful women naked? Oh yeah, some absolutely gorgeous B-movie babies in leather bikinis and a lot less. They may be a primitive tribe but they've obviously mastered the art of aerobics and breast enhancement!Frequent use of stock footage? Yep, it's amazing how many Dakotas the military use even in the 90s. Even more amazing they seem to have the ability to fly directly from Korea to the US which is quite an amazing feat of endurance. Appalling special effects? Yep, I can't really decide which is worse, the baby T-Rex which is so blatantly a hand operated puppet or the adult T-Rex which is very obviously two men in a big rubber suit?Dialogue which makes you wince? By golly and how! Plot which makes little or no sense? In spades!Just for the record, the Stegasaurus is a vegetarian dinosaur so why do they kill it?So don't go in expecting Citizen Kane but for what it is this is a fine film in the great Fred Olen Ray tradition.

*SPOILER ALERT* *SPOILER ALERT*It's 10:00 p.m. on Friday night and I just had a shot of jack and finished off my third beer. This party is out of control! I just watched "Dinosaur Island" followed by an episode of "Black Tie Nights" on Cinemax. This couple was on a date and then they had sex. That's the show. Genius eh?Speaking of genius, "Dinosaur Island" was a T&A spectacular. Three army guys crash land on the island of the prehistoric breast implants. They must prove themselves worthy of their big bouncy affection by slaying the really cheap dinosaur that prowls the island. The girls are confused by the new arrivals in their midst. "What is this thing you men call love?" The guys are ready to shed the cavegirl's clothes and get this party started on a Saturday night.Once again, I must give praise where it's due. Michelle Bauer is the real deal. As the women pair off with the men, Michelle chooses the fattest loser to hook up with. She gives hope to all of us dorks out here every time she rips off her bra. Thank you Michelle for getting naked for us again. There are plenty of other women who take their tops off as well. So that's good too. All of the dinosaur scenes were ridiculously cheap but I didn't mind. You don't think I actually watched this for the dinosaurs do you? Of course not. Anyway, "Dinosaur Island" is a good T&A flick. It's worth a look for B-movie lovers. One last thing, keep an eye out for Nikki Fritz who shows up at the very beginning of the movie. I thought she looked familiar but I didn't realize it was her until after the credits rolled. She is the High Priestess who has her breasts painted blue and dances around like a stripper. Apparently the dinosaur is attracted to the human sacrifice by the hypnotic gyrations of cavewoman pole dancing.

As a collector and fan of B-movies, I'd have to put this one high on my most-valued list. It's literally overflowing with genre talent, most notably as a collaboration between two of the finest modern B-movie directors: Jim Wynorski and Fred Olen Ray. Also, it's got a killer cast, featuring Michelle Bauer (HOLLYWOOD CHAINSAW HOOKERS), Griffin Drew (BIKINI HOE DOWN), Richard Gabai (VIRGIN HIGH), Nikki Fritz (ATTACK OF THE 60-FOOT CENTERFOLD), and Antonia Dorian (BARE WENCH PROJECT). Sure, the jokes are cheesy. Sure, that "dinosaur" effect isn't quite Stan Winston quality. However, there's some things Hollywood can never duplicate, and that's the feel of a good B-movie with lots of scream queens. Here's hoping they never stop making movies like this.