One of those low-budget mockumentary stinkers that have a very thin story (or in this case no story), just a bunch of annoying actors saying essentially the same thing over and over, implying that some weird danger is afoot. And they keep promising this danger, and promising and promising it to the increasingly restless viewers, but it never materializes - until the very last scene: but at that point it's a wrap-up, folks! You got nothing! Now go back to your real horror films, folks. In that sense, not much different from "Monster A Go-Go" actually.The first hour is incredibly boring. All we get is the backstory of some dullard who may or may not have seen supernatural things, brought to us by actors that somehow manage to be quite annoying, and this goes basically for the male cast. They serve us the most boring details, over and over. An "expedition" made up of some of these amateur goons goes to his ranch, and they just wonder around aimlessly while doing their corny little camcorder improv shtick. OK, at least they're not teens, but they might as well be, intellectually.After the first hour things pick up - ever so slightly, almost unnoticeably. The characters bicker and they seem scared - while the viewer waits impatiently for something horror-like to happen. Or at least some proper hints and clues as to what the hell they're supposed to find there: a cult? Indian sacrifice? What? Nope, we get no info at all. You, the viewer, are low in the pecking order and not much of a priority for the amateurs who make these kinds of turkeys.And then the two idiotic plot-twists. It was all fake! Tuh-duh! The twerp set the whole thing up. Seconds after he reveals this stupid and quite illogical surprise, the group gets attacked by the real forces of evil and that's it. No explanation, not even an inkling of a hint of a clue. Like a Bugs Bunny cartoon, minus the ingenuity.So if your idea of scary entertainment is watching boots hung on trees, or bad actors pretending they're frightened despite nothing much happening around them, this might be a film for you. Have fun with this dross, because these film-makers are in need of fans. Any fans. Clueless newbie horror fans and anyone else who finds boring things interesting.

This film started out really slow and a bit boring for me. When they started exploring the house, things started picking up and I really enjoyed it. The landscape really helped a lot, and helped set the mood I feel. I enjoyed the film up until the end. I thought there were a lot of things they threw in and never explained (Was there a point to the Nazi memorabilia?) The very end of the movie was something seen a million times and the effects were not good. I think if they just focused on the story of the woman in white it would've been a lot better.I did like the documentary style of movie that this was. The ending ruined it for me.

Roger Ebert claimed that Human Centipede was the worst movie ever made, but at least it had a purpose (and plot and acting). No, this is truly, absolutely, the worst movie ever made in the history of all movies.Don't think I take this condemnation lightly. This "movie" should not even be called a film. It is the movie version of muzak, or Kidz Bop. It's a movie that got made that no one thought was good or intended for anyone to see. I truly think that they hoped to sell this to netflix and some really, really low-level channels, like channel 33 in Guatemala at 3:00am.Oh, if only this film were bad. There are movies that are so bad, they become campy or cult films. No, this film is the most mediocre waste of film to ever be produced. This film is like a computer algorithm wrote it, and it's got the formula down exactly, but it just slapped in whatever. Or that the film maker made it really fast, like a college kid with a paper due the next day.It's a bummer, because the base of a good movie is there. I mean, it's about his own father who was on Unsolved Mysteries because his ranch was so haunted! So, even though the beginning is full of this lame guy and his painfully, painfully white privileged, LA friends, for about 20 minutes you have a tiny hope that this thing might be watchable.First third of the movie: I'm mildly interested because of the true family dynamics so even though the central cast sucks, maybe this will come out to be enjoyable.Second third: This isn't much of a spoiler, because this film has seemingly hundreds of things haunting the ranch including: Cherokees, angry ghost of woman raped to death by Cherokees, Nazis, possessed pigs, dead animals, live animals, blurry things, thudding things, scary blurred face ghost children, ghost pickup trucks, aliens?, ghost rocks (not kidding), ghosts down a hole, goat-killing demons, tire-slashing demons (I will grant that they might be the same as the goat-slashing demons), a tiny baby piano, spiders, maybe the Blair Witch (they go in circles a lot and yell about maps), people going crazy, women screaming on cell phones, kids screaming, and so on. So, the second third is sort of a numbing, deep confusion.Last third: Playing Candy Crush and wondering how much worse this can get (the ending. There isn't a student film around with a worse ending.)

I'm may be a little biased with my review. So, real Texan here. It was an excellent surprise to see Jack Glover's appearance in the movie. I haven't been a fan of bouncing camera Blair Witch Project/Cloverfield style of filming taking over so many new horror movies! I'm glad I gave this one a chance. The manual camera style isn't over the top, and it actually works well with the plot. I think it's time to take a weekend trip to The Devil's Backbone. I know I'll never forget my times with Jack Glover as a child. The fact that he was portraying himself went a long ways with me. I've looked up some of the other stories/events the movie references, and it's obvious there was a lot of research that went into the story.