In the beginning God created the heaven and the earth, followed by light, water, whales and a whole load of other shizz. Eventually, he created man in his own image. In time, man created Hollywood, and not long after that, the Italians created rip-offs. Adam and Eve Meet The Cannibals is the Italian answer to American 'loss of innocence' movies like The Blue Lagoon (1980) and Paradise (1982), the film following its photogenic titular couple (played by Mark Gregory of Bronx Warriors 1&2, and Andrea Goldman of nothing else) as they struggle to survive after being cast out of the Garden of Eden for sampling the forbidden fruit.The film is largely an excuse for directors Enzo Doria and Luigi Russo to show their stars in the buff; both Adam and Eve frolic buck naked, making this an equal opportunities exploitation flick—something for both men and women to enjoy. But being Italian rip-off movie-makers, they can't help but throw in lots of mind bogglingly daft nonsense, making their film an absolute hoot of biblical proportions. In addition to the copious nudity, viewers are also treated to a hilarious action scene inspired by Raiders of the Ark (a massive stop-motion boulder rolling after Adam and Eve in a display of pathetic special effects), a couple of dreadful animal attacks (a manky pterodactyl and a moth-eaten bear), a tribe of ape-men (and women), and, of course, the cannibals: a race of laughable pig-faced, ginger-haired creatures.Obviously, this is far from great cinema, and not really deserving of a very high rating, but for those who enjoy unadulterated trash, Adam and Eve Meet The Cannibals is a must-see.5.5/10 (rounded up to 6 for IMDb) for the bear and the prehistoric bird, and for Goldman, a terrible actress but very easy on the eye.

Adam and Eve (1983) ** 1/2 (out of 4) God creates Adam (Mark Gregory) and then graces him with Eve (Andrea Goldman) but before long they are cast out of the Garden of Eden after Eve eats from the forbidden fruit. Soon the two are out on a crazy adventure that leads them through some dangerous places.This here was released to American video shelves as ADAM AND EVE MEET THE CANNIBALS so that there should pretty much tell you everything you need to know. This here is 100% pure Italian exploitation and it's just a downright mind-numbing movie from start to finish. It's basically a version of THE BLUE LAGOON but we've got the story of Adam and Eve to tell but I seriously doubt the filmmakers were overly familiar with the Bible! If you're wanting something to show the kiddies then this here certainly isn't that. No, this here is pure exploitation and it's downright hilarious at times. There are so many crazy things going on in this picture that it would be wrong for me to spoil all of them but if you're familiar with the genre then you already know that bad special effects don't stop them from making a movie. Just wait until you see the scene where a giant big attacks Adam and he has to fight it off. Even better is a beyond awful sequence where Eve is attacked by a bear and Adam and another man has to rescue her. The look of this bear is so crazy that you'll be wondering if someone slipped acid into your drink! As you'd expect, we've got some really lame performances and the dubbing is pretty bad as well but there's really not too much dialogue. Instead we basically just see these two lovers go from one destination to the next and of course there's always some sort of drama. And yes, there are cannibals, ape creatures and a variety of other weird things on hand. The opening creation scene of Adam was actually well-done as was Eve's birth but on the whole there's really not much of anything "good" here.Fans of bad cinema are really going to love watching this. It's certainly one of the craziest movies out there and as awful as it is, the thing always has something happening in it and it's certainly never boring. A must see for fans of Italian exploitation.

ADAM AND EVE MEET THE CANNIBALS is undoubtedly the weirdest Bible story you'll ever see. It's an Italian trash classic that manages to ride the wave of no less than four popular sub-genres of the era, a film that provides fitfully cheesy entertainment despite the many shortcomings of the production budget and script. It's one of those films that only true connoisseurs of trash cinema will enjoy, a so-bad-it's-good piece of filmmaking from Italy.The first genre is the mini-wave of 'back to nature' films that followed in the wake of the success of THE BLUE LAGOON. I haven't seen too many of these, but the directors had already made one rip-off (BLUE ISLAND) so I guess they were well versed to make this story. The second genre is the religious epic, although ADAM AND EVE MEET THE CANNIBALS is about as far away from any Bible story as THE TERMINATOR. The third genre is the prehistoric caveman epic, popular at the time with QUEST FOR FIRE and all of the inspirations that followed, not least the gory Italian rip-off MASTER OF THE WORLD. The fourth is the cannibal film, bizarrely enough.This film's plot starts off traditionally, with Eve being tempted by a serpent and having a bite of the apple. Once they're kicked out of the Garden of Eden, the weirdness begins. The story follows a journey narrative as the twosome meet various tribes and characters and undergo some bizarre experiences. There's a brief battle with a stop-motion Pterodactyl (!) and encounters with ferocious tigers and the like. A rolling boulder scene straight out of RAIDERS OF THE LOST ARK but with hilariously cheesy effects. An encounter with some Neanderthals and later a long passage involving jungle natives which directly references the Italian cannibal film genre of the 1970s. Add in rugged scenery (the whole thing was shot in the great outdoors) and the cheesiest song accompanying a sex scene this side of LUST FOR A VAMPIRE, and you have one memorably bad film. The actor playing Adam, Mark Gregory, was familiar from his roles in the various BRONX WARRIOR type films, while Eve's Andrea Goldman was a complete unknown, and it shows.

There are no carnivores in Eden, and Adam's (Mark Gregory) first son may very well have really been the offspring of Handsome Bearkiller (Angel Alcazar), a brief extramarital partner enjoyed by Eve (Andrea Goldman) during the pair's estrangement. Never having seen fighting or killing, the two are totally unprepared to defend themselves after being cast from Eden, and equally astonished to see animals and men feeding off each other. They make their first clothing not from leaves, but from a pterodactyl's wings, the first creature to attack them and the first creature they had to kill. These are some of the interesting "facts" depicted by this imaginative take on the first book of Genesis. It's not as silly as it sounds, the acting and action are really quite good and the different twists to the familiar tale will hold viewer interest while still retaining the Biblical link. The aforementioned Cro-Magnon warrior bearkiller (Angel Alcazar) really steals the show with his valiant ferocity and desire to appropriate the rather helpless Eve from her wimpy inept Adam.